


Home

by Caramelquokka0325



Series: Home [1]
Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Broken Families, Brotherhood, Bullying, Chan Dad, Child Changbin, Child Jisung, Child Minho, Comfort, Developing Friendships, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Family Bonding, Family Dynamics, Father-Son Relationship, Foster Care, Friendship, Healing, Multi, Neglect, Nightmares, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Separation Anxiety, Separations, Social Anxiety, foster parenting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-09
Updated: 2020-09-09
Packaged: 2021-03-05 06:00:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 41,917
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25369507
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Caramelquokka0325/pseuds/Caramelquokka0325
Summary: Changbin hadn’t expected his life to be turned upside down with the arrival of a little boy named Jisung. Only eleven years old with wide brown eyes and tousled hair, he stood on Changbin’s doorstep holding only a backpack and a puppy dog plushie that was missing an ear. He hadn’t expected to have to fight for him so hard. Yet he wouldn’t trade a moment because the smiles were worth the tears and the laughter was worth the heartache.REVISED: But may contain some mistakes!
Series: Home [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1837153
Comments: 38
Kudos: 256





	1. Changbin

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! This is my first work here so feedback is more than welcome! I wrote this story based off of a lot of personal experience so it’s close to my heart! Though I strive to make the work as accurate as possible, there may be some mistakes and please bear in mind that everyone's experience is different! Also please keep in mind that some themes and moments of the story may be triggering! I will tag as relevant before each chapter! More important notes are at the end of the chapter since I don’t want to spoil the story but have some comments! Happy reading!  
> TW: Brief mentions of neglect, emotional abuse.

Choosing to foster was a big decision in Changbin’s life. Possibly the biggest. It was just in his nature to have always been drawn to the kids who didn’t have anyone else. Through all the ups and downs, he wouldn’t trade it for anything.

It was only a few weeks of pure happiness before reality came crashing back in. This time, in the form of a little boy named Jisung. Only eleven years old, with wide brown eyes and tousled hair, he stood on Changbin’s doorstep holding only a backpack and a puppy dog plushie that was missing an ear.

The workers had told Changbin that he was quiet and shy. That he seemed very obedient and hadn’t had any outbursts so far. They had told Changbin that he would be an easy kid to take in. Changbin had happily opened his arms and his doors for the boy to join his small family. He had no idea that the months to come would be harder than he could ever have dreamed.

For eleven years old, Jisung was small. Not just in size, but in heart. He had seemed to be just fairly comfortable in the beginning. Faking confidence and settling into his place without a fuss. Within days, any semblance of confidence shattered and Changbin was left with a deeply hurting child that he didn’t know what to do with.

Almost every night, Changbin dealt with the meltdowns. Sometimes it started with a long day, or a sudden reminder, or even just a moment of insecurity that made Jisung crumple in on himself. And by the time Changbin had picked up the pieces, he was already standing there again with his lower lip trembling and his eyes filling with unshed tears.

The worst day of the first week was when they had their first visitation after coming up with the plan with his dad. Jisung cried all the way home and Changbin was at a loss. 

He wanted to just sit on the couch and close his eyes, but he couldn’t stop thinking about the boy just a few doors away who was probably on his bed still crying. He pushed himself up and headed to Jisung’s room.

He knocked softly before swinging the door open to, sure enough, Jisung sitting on his bed with his puppy cradled to his chest and tear tracks on his face.

Changbin approached slowly and didn’t make a big scene of sitting down on the bed. He let Jisung get used to his presence before speaking.

“Is there anything you want to talk about?” Changbin asked him.

Jisung shook his head slightly and traced circles onto his knee.

“If you’re ever sad or feeling down, I’m here to talk to.” Changbin told him. 

He may not open up anytime soon just because Changbin said it, but it let him know Changbin was around if he needed.

“How long do I have to stay here?” Jisung said so softly, Changbin almost didn’t catch it.

“I’m not sure…” Changbin answered honestly. “It’s up to how the reunification process and court dates go.”

He let Jisung sit in silence for a moment before questioning him further.

“Do you want to go home?”

Jisung nodded slowly after a few moments and then his gaze flickered up to meet Changbin’s.

To some people it may not make sense how a child could want to return to their father who was neglectful and at times abusive. But in a detached way, Changbin understood. Children wanted to be with their parents. And being in an unknown place, with unknown people would make a child want to return to what they knew. What felt safe, even if it wasn’t.

“We’ll see how it goes.” Changbin smiled at him. “But while you’re here, you can tell me what you would like to make it a good stay, okay? Almost like a vacation.”

Jisung tilted his head at that. He was probably confused at how open and gentle Changbin was being. He didn’t have many experiences with adults treating him in that way.

“You have school in the morning.” Changbin expertly led the conversation away. “When I pick you up, we are going to go to my parents’ house for dinner.”

He had already told Jisung but it was good to give a reminder, especially since schedules were something Jisung wasn’t used to. 

“How many people will be there?” Jisung asked.

“Just my parents.” Changbin replied. 

Jisung nodded, not seeming phased by it. Changbin would have preferred to ease him into meeting his parents and then friends, but his parents were going on an extended vacation so they were a bit rushed.

When Changbin had decided he wanted to be a foster parent, his own parents had been shocked. They personally had no experience with it and viewed it negatively. Because of Changbin’s young age they had thought it impossible. However, Changbin met all the requirements and passed with flying colors. Since he had worked as a caseworker himself for at least two years, he knew the system well.

He knew how many kids were desperate for homes. Even if he wasn’t the definition of a traditional family, he would offer one if he could. 

Half of the foster homes that take in kids never end up actually adopting. Changbin thought he had understood at first, not sure if he was ready to adopt his own child. But he believed if he was given the opportunity, he would adopt easily.

His parents had also heavily objected at the time he mentioned the possibility, still getting used to him just being a temporary home. Yet in the end Changbin did what he knew was best.

Jisung was not a fan of school. He was in grade six and so far, Changbin hadn’t heard him mention any friends. He was so shy and hesitant in the new grade. He was still in the same school as before but he felt different. 

Changbin’s best friend had mentioned to him that even familiar things felt strange and different once you were in a new foster home. Changbin had kept that in mind and not assumed that Jisung would be totally comfortable in familiar settings.

That’s why Changbin had taken a week to let Jisung adjust. He wanted to take Jisung shopping for more than just the basics but he even held off on that to let him breathe for a moment, especially after the first visit with his dad.

Changbin pulled up to the school to pick up Jisung. He sat in the same spot on the same curb every day so Changbin would be able to find him. At least, that was what Jisung had told him. Changbin picked up a hint of anxiety for being left behind from him.

“How was school?” Changbin asked Jisung as he climbed into the car.

“Okay.” Jisung replied softly.

Changbin always made a habit of asking him about his day if he wasn’t around.

“We have another hour of driving to get to their house.” Changbin warned him. “But here.”

He passed back a bag with some food he had packed for the trip. He had expected Jisung would be hungry after school and his parents tended to eat dinner later than they did.

“Half a sandwich, one bag of strawberries and some chips.” Changbin commented as Jisung rummaged in the bag.

“Thank you.” Jisung said quietly.

It was obvious that Jisung was anxious. Changbin had become very perceptive and he noticed the way Jisung frowned without realizing it.

Like he learned in many of his cases at work, direct confrontation was hard. Instead, he found ways around it to get him to open up without feeling pressured.

“Grandma and grandpa have a fish pond in the backyard.” Changbin told him. 

“Do you like fishing?” Changbin asked Jisung.

“I’ve never tried.” he responded. “Is it hard?” 

He shoulders relaxed and his expression smoothed out as he started talking to Changbin. 

The rest of the drive was calm and they were a few minutes away according to the GPS when Jisung spoke up to Changbin again.

“What do I call them?” he asked with a slight frown.

“Who?” Changbin was confused. “Oh, my parents?”

Jisung nodded.

“Anything you feel comfortable with.” Changbin replied. “You can call them by their names if you want. They don’t mind.”

“Okay.” Jisung went back to staring out the window.

When they arrived, Jisung was visibly nervous. While Changbin locked the car, he pressed his hands together nervously. It softened Changbin’s heart and he let himself put his hand on Jisung’s shoulder for encouragement.

Changbin greeted his parents at the door and Jisung trailed behind Woojin.

“Hey son.” Changbin’s dad pulled him into a brief hug as they got closer.

“This is Jisung.” Changbin stepped back and introduced the shy boy. “He just turned eleven years old.”

Jisung’s ears flushed pink and he gave a small wave before subconsciously shifting closer to Changbin.

Luckily, Changbin’s parents had learned how to leave space and not overwhelm in the beginning. They invited them in and started to introduce to the other guests.

“Let’s go outside!” Changbin gently guided Jisung’s towards the door to the backyard. “We can look at the fish.”

It was a nice fish pond and fairly large. Changbin dropped to his hands and knees and dipped his fingers in after a moment to encourage Jisung to come closer. Changbin guessed it probably wasn’t too clean but he let it go.

“Feel the plants!” Changbin urged Jisung. “If you touch it, the fish swim out.”

Jisung tentatively crouched down and put his fingers in the water. 

“It’s cold.” he commented.

“The fish like the cold though.” Changbin shrugged.

“I don’t like cold water.” Jisung scrunched up his nose but put his hand deeper. “I like warm baths not showers.”

“Showers have warm water.” Changbin frowned at the logic.

“At my house you take a cold shower if you did something bad.” Jisung said simply.

Changbin frowned at that, surprised by his admission. He had never heard of that type of discipline though it sounded far from acceptable.

“That’s…odd.” Changbin finally settled on.

They started talking about the fish but Changbin tucked away the information for later.

The rest of the night wrapped up well and Changbin was happy that Jisung had felt comfortable in the new environment. He had tired himself out by playing around.

Jisung fell asleep on the car ride back home because he was so tired. Changbin felt his heart melt all over again at how young he looked with his cheek squished against the seatbelt and his hand still loosely holding the cookie they had left with.

Changbin debated waking him up or not to take him inside. He didn’t want him to feel disoriented so he decided just keeping him asleep was best.

He undid his seatbelt carefully and took the cookie from his hand. Jisung only shifted slightly as Changbin lifted him gently into his arms. Changbin unlocked the door with one hand, while supporting Jisung on his shoulder.

Jisung sighed sleepily against him and brought his arms up over Changbin’s shoulders. When Changbin leaned down to set him on his bed, he tightened his grip around his neck.

“Mm daddy…” he mumbled, making Changbin freeze.

He was half asleep but his whisper had startled Changbin. He tried to let it pass and gently pulled his arms off so he could lay on his bed.

Jisung rubbed his eyes and blinked up at him.

“You can go back to sleep.” Changbin whispered as he slipped his shoes off.

Changbin tucked the blanket around him and handed him his mismatched puppy plushie. Seeing the little comfort toy made him sad for a moment.

“Sleep well Jisung.” Changbin brushed his thumb under his eye that was already closed again.

That weekend they went shopping, just him and Jisung. Changbin had a rough list but he was more interested in Jisung getting what he wanted. He barely had any possessions at Changbin’s place.

He had requested some things brought from his own house but it wasn’t nearly enough. They pulled up to the mall with Changbin’s wallet ready to be depleted.

Jisung was a bit overwhelmed and not sure where to start so Changbin took him to a store he might like.

“I get to buy one?” Jisung gasped, pressing his hands up against the glass.

“Ah… no but we can look at them for fun.” Changbin scratched his head, hoping he wasn’t too disappointed that he couldn’t pick out a puppy from the store.

Jisung giggled as a white puppy jumped up against the glass like it was excited to see him. Changbin watched him with a smile.

Changbin let him take his time looking at all the different puppies. It would hopefully make him more relaxed as they spent the rest of the day. He joined Jisung at one of the cubbies that was against the ground.

Jisung was crouched, watching a family of puppies and their mom intently. Changbin crouched next to him.

“One is different.” Jisung pointed to a jet-black puppy that was a different breed than the others.

“Yeah.” Changbin nodded.

“Why?” Jisung leaned closer.

Changbin glanced at the name card on the corner of the glass that introduced the inhabitants.

“Looks like his mom can’t take care of him so this mom is.” Changbin pointed to the dog. “There is room for him with the other puppies.”

“Oh.” Jisung nodded in understanding. “He’s like me.”

“What do you mean?” Changbin tilted his head.

“He can’t be with his real family so he is staying with another one.” Jisung explained, resting his chin on his knees.

“I guess you’re right.” Changbin considered his words.

Sometimes Changbin wondered how much Jisung understood of what was happening with his own family. Like when he had shared so nonchalantly that he was punished with cold showers. It made Changbin wonder how he viewed the world. Was it a dark place or a light place?

Changbin wanted to know what was going through Jisung’s father’s mind as well. He really couldn’t understand how a parent could treat their own child like a burden or a nuisance. No child could commit such a great sin as to deserve such treatment.

Changbin couldn’t shake his words from his head for the rest of the day. He got Jisung ice cream afterwards, hoping it could be a memory that gave him hope. He hoped it made the world seem a little brighter in his eyes.

Because Changbin knew that to a kid like Jisung, it wasn’t just an ice cream cone. It was the feeling that someone cared enough to do something simple for him. 

He held his bags of new clothes and things on his lap on the way home. It wasn’t just the material item. It was the realization that someone was there to look out for him or take care of him.

Changbin hoped that his home could be a safe place for Jisung, even if he wasn’t with them forever. He hoped to share some hope with the boy.

Changbin realized just how fragile Jisung was when they were watching a movie that Changbin had picked out. It was a kid’s movie and when Changbin had read the reviews it didn’t send off any red flags.

Until there was a scene where one of the characters had an argument with their parent. To Changbin it was very mild but when he looked over, Jisung was watching frozen with a stricken look on his face.

“Hey…” Changbin whispered, leaning over towards him.

When he got close to Jisung, the boy jerked away from him, turning his frightened eyes onto Changbin. His hands came up against his chest protectively and it made Changbin draw back slightly.

It was obvious the scene had bothered him but Changbin didn’t want to draw attention to him and make him feel more uncomfortable.

“Why don’t you come with me.” Changbin whispered and stood. “We can get some ice cream.”

Jisung followed him into the kitchen, his arms wrapped around himself and the same troubled expression on his face.

Changbin pulled a container of ice cream out of the freezer and then turned to address him.

“Whatcha thinking about?” he asked. He hoped Jisung would share honestly.

He fidgeted in place a bit before answering. Changbin didn’t look at him, pulling out bowls for the ice cream so he felt less pressure.

“I don’t like yelling.” he finally said.

“Mm…” Changbin nodded.

“I don’t like when people yell when they fight.” Jisung whispered quietly.

Changbin took in his words thoughtfully. Yelling must be something Jisung was familiar with and therefore had a strong aversion to.

“I don’t like yelling either.” Changbin told him. “It’s not very kind, huh.”

Jisung stared up at him with his wide brown eyes that made Changbin melt every time. He wondered if Jisung had any idea how charming he was.

“In our house, we don’t yell when we fight.” Changbin told him as he served ice cream into the bowls. “If I have a problem, I use a calm voice to talk it out.”

He handed a bowl to Jisung who seemed much less anxious now.

“I won’t ever yell at you, okay?” he added in, wanting Jisung to feel absolutely certain that Changbin wouldn’t subject him to that.

Jisung blinked at him and the hint of a frown flitted across his face as if he was confused. But then he nodded.

“Do you want to keep watching the movie?” Changbin asked.

Jisung nodded again and reached his hand out to carry Changbin’s bowl for him. Changbin smiled at the sweet gesture and handed it to him.

During the next week, something shifted with Jisung. He suddenly grew even more attached to Changbin. Changbin had to remind himself over and over that he was only eleven years old. He was still so young, he would understandably have coping mechanisms to deal with the complex emotions and situations he was going through.

But he worried that his separation anxiety and attachment would cause division in the future. He had offered Jisung love and understanding and everything he had been deprived of. Jisung absolutely took it all in and more. He was so desperate to be loved and praised and protected that he noticeably spent his time trying to get Changbin’s attention.

It had felt positive at first, the way he had become more comfortable and started to engage with him. Until Changbin started to realize he lacked proper boundaries. He could see Jisung starting to sway back and forth between his father and Changbin. He didn’t want to be a source of division.

Jisung slipped his hand into Changbin’s while they walked to the park without seeming phased. Jisung had probably never held hands with his own father like this and was taking advantage of the opportunity. It wasn’t wrong, but Changbin knew it would just make Jisung fall for him all the harder.

He kicked at rocks in the sidewalk while holding Changbin’s hand, sometimes adjusting his grip. He was wearing one of Changbin’s jackets because it was the first one he had grabbed. It was too big on him and the sleeves swallowed his hands so he had to keep wiggling his fingers back through. 

It just made him look smaller and more fragile, reminding Changbin of the fine line they walked. His goal was reunification, but it made it hard for him not to want to scoop Jisung into his arms and protect him when he was right there being a kid.

He was just a kid who was trying to navigate through a life made ten times harder than most. When Jisung slipped his hand out of Changbin’s to push his sleeve up again, Changbin waited and kept his hand extended.

He wouldn’t deny Jisung of what small comfort it gave him just because he wasn’t the one who should be offering in the first place.

That was the way it was with Jisung. Changbin wanted to keep him safe and help him feel confident. Yet sometimes Changbin felt himself slipping into wanting to keep Jisung with him forever. His father had made so many mistakes, it was hard for Changbin to think of reunification sometimes. But it was his responsibility so he had to think rationally.


	2. Jisung

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome to chapter 2! This one is in Jisung’s POV! There will be four POV’s in this story, so heads up! This is still a pretty slow chapter as I wanted to give a good background and description of some of the things revolving around foster care. Especially the relationship between Jisung and Changbin.  
> TW: Social anxiety, past descriptions of abuse.

Jisung had never experienced anything like living with Changbin. Some mornings he woke up and just lay in bed trying to think through how Changbin would let him stay there. It was like a dream that didn’t make sense. Why would someone let him live in their house and eat their food and take up their time?

He sometimes didn’t understand why Changbin was the one taking care of him now instead of his dad. He had been transplanted into a new home overnight and it still felt weird sometimes.

Jisung hopped out of the car and onto the asphalt of the park’s parking area. He had new sneakers, bright blue with bright white laces. He didn’t want to take them off because he loved them so much. Changbin even let him wear them in the house as long as they weren’t dirty.

“Doesn’t look like he’s here yet.” Changbin observed. “Let me put sunscreen on you.”

Jisung’s dad was usually a little late to visits. Sometimes Jisung expected him to forget to come but he showed up eventually.

“I’m hungry.” Jisung announced as Changbin rubbed sunscreen onto his arm.

“You’ll have lunch when he gets here.” Changbin replied. 

Jisung’s dad was supposed to bring lunch today. It was one of his “tasks”. Changbin didn’t like to call them that but the caseworker marked them down if he did them so Jisung guessed it was a task.

Changbin tilted his chin up to apply sunscreen to his face. Jisung closed his eyes and scrunched up his face, making Changbin laugh and poke him.

“Oh, look who just pulled up!” Changbin put away the sunscreen and stood up. 

Jisung was a little shy of his father. Especially now that he was living with someone else. He thought his dad might be secretly angry at him about it. It was always a little awkward in the first few minutes when Changbin left.

Jisung sat at a picnic table and swung his feet back and forth underneath him as he ate the sandwich his dad had brought. It was just peanut butter and bread and it made his mouth feel dry but he didn’t say anything.

He briefly wondered what Changbin was eating. If he was with him, he would probably cut the crusts off his sandwich and have cut up fruit.

His dad stared out over the park grounds as he ate. Jisung hummed under his breath as he ate, letting himself slip into his own world as well.

“What are you singing?” Jisung glanced up in surprise.

“A song I learned at school.” he replied. “I have a music class.”

His dad nodded so Jisung smiled widely, squeezing his eyes closed because Changbin said it made him look cute.

They walked afterwards and Jisung found a stick. He wanted to show it to Changbin because it was so long but he decided it belonged at the park. He dragged it along the ground as he walked beside his dad.

After a little while, Jisung looked at his dad next to him. Changbin let Jisung hold his hand when they walked together sometimes. It was fun to swing their hands back and forth when they walked. He wanted to try with his dad but he didn’t know if it would be okay.

Jisung decided he would be brave so he boldly grabbed his dad’s hand in his own. His hand was a little sticky with peanut butter and dirt but his dad didn’t pull away. It made Jisung happy and he even swung their hands a little bit.

When Changbin picked him up, Jisung was in a good mood. He ran up to Changbin and tugged on his arm to show him the pond.

“Hold on!” Changbin laughed. “Let me talk to your dad for a minute, okay?”

Jisung shifted back and forth on his toes as they talked.

“He told me he’s been going places with you.” His dad shoved his hands in his pockets.

“Yeah, we’ve been going to the aquarium, baseball games, stuff like that.” Changbin smiled back.

“I just don’t want him to get too used to those things.” His dad replied. “You know that’s not something I can do.”

Jisung crouched down and traced in the dirt with his finger.

“I understand.” Changbin finally said.

“I would appreciate it if you checked with me first.” Jisung didn’t understand why his dad was interested in what they did. “He’ll get spoiled.”

“What we do in my household has no bearing on you.” Changbin replied and Jisung noticed his voice lacked his usual brightness. “We both hold up our sides of this relationship and have jurisdiction over the time we spend with him independently.”

“I have the final say over what my son does.” his dad responded back and Jisung caught a hint of frustration in his voice. Why was he getting angry? Jisung didn’t understand.

“At the moment, the state does.” Changbin replied evenly. “We’re both doing our best.”

Jisung glanced up when his dad didn’t respond. Why would he want to know what they were doing?

“I’ll see you next week.” he finally said. “Bye Jisung.”

Jisung stood up and waved as he headed back to his car.

Changbin seemed awfully quiet to Jisung and it made him confused. When he sat in his seat, Changbin wiped his hands with a sanitizing wipe.

“Why are you sad?” Jisung tilted his head.

“I’m not sad.” Changbin looked at him and gave him a smile.

“Did my dad do something wrong?” Jisung asked.

Changbin cleaned between his fingers in silence for a moment.

“No. It’s fine.” Changbin brushed his hand over Jisung’s hair as he stood back. “Don’t worry about it sweetheart.”

Jisung smiled at the pet name and sat back in his seat, feeling better.

Changbin was quickly becoming someone Jisung trusted. He thought Changbin was endlessly cool and loved spending time with him. Changbin was very kind and let Jisung come into his office whenever he wanted. If Jisung was bored, Changbin almost always set aside time to play with him.

One worry of Changbin’s, that he started to notice more and more, was Jisung’s lack of discussing his friends. He never talked about people or at school or otherwise. Changbin brought it up one night while Jisung was doing his homework.

Changbin was sitting on the couch doing some work while Jisung lay on the carpet working on math homework.

“Hey Jisung, I was wondering who your best friend is.” Changbin spoke up.

“My what?” Jisung raised his head to look at him.

“Your best friend. Like who do you hang out with most?”

Jisung considered for a long moment and then he pointed back at Changbin.

“Me?” Changbin was surprised.

“I guess.” Jisung shrugged awkwardly. “I don’t have a best friend at school.”

“Okay, then who are some of your other friends?” Changbin persisted.

“Umm…” Changbin could tell Jisung wasn’t able to supply an answer. “It’s hard to make friends at school…”

Changbin was honestly surprised. Jisung was a genuinely sweet, fun kid. At home he was very talkative and engaged. It seemed at school he was shy and withdrawn.

He talked to Jisung’s teacher that week and she informed him he hung on the outskirts of group activities and hesitated to initiate one on one interactions. It honestly baffled Changbin. Jisung seemed like the type to go all in. But then again, maybe he felt different on the inside. Many foster kids felt different than other kids their age event though their very personality was no different.

It almost seemed cliché, but Changbin wanted to help Jisung build his confidence. First at home and then at school in tandem. But he was faked with a stubborn obstacle.

Jisung’s father never seemed to know the right things to say to Jisung. Changbin couldn’t even count how many times Jisung had broken down over something that had happened. He always tried to hide it too which made it harder to combat.

“Hey kiddo…” Changbin sat down next to Jisung who was sitting on his bedroom floor, his back against his bed, and face buried in his arms.

Changbin put his arms over his shoulders gently and pulled him closer. Jisung allowed Changbin a lot more physical contact as time went on. Now Changbin didn’t feel as nervous giving a soothing hug.

“What’s going on?” Changbin asked softly.

“I-I don’t know.” Jisung sniffled. “I… my dad doesn’t want me anymore.”

“Why do you think that?” Changbin asked carefully. “Did he say that?”

“Kind of.” Jisung blinked at him with glassy eyes. “He said I’m too much work.”

In these situations Changbin always had to take a deep breath before continuing. He had always been a very just person. He couldn’t stand when people hurt other people. He hated to see Jisung hurt by his father, even unintentionally in many cases.

“Nobody is too much work.” Changbin told him. “We’re all the same humans Jisung. We all have different things we have to deal with but YOU are definitely not too much work.”

“But-.” Jisung started.

“Listen to me sweetheart.” Changbin said gently. “We all have to make an effort with people but it should never be work. Being with you is only joy for me. No work.”

“But you have to take care of me and…” Jisung looked confused.

“I do all of that happily.” Changbin assured him. “If you love something or someone, it’s not work, it’s something you love.”

“Then does my dad not love me anymore?” Jisung whispered.

“No. That’s not it.” Changbin shook his head quickly, trying to tread carefully. “Right now, he’s… confused. He’s a bit confused on what it means to take care of someone.”

“Oh…” Jisung seemed to process his words.

“It’s not necessarily a bad thing.” Changbin continued. “He is still figuring some things out and it has nothing to do with you.”

“Really?” Jisung sniffed and wiped his tears.

“Yep.” Changbin nodded. “Don’t feel bad about yourself Ji. You have nothing to do with it.”

Jisung seemed to take his words to hurt since he stopped crying and looked a little more at ease.

When he was brushing his teeth, Changbin came in to say goodnight.

“It’s getting colder at night so I put an extra blanket on your bed.” he told Jisung. “Also, my friend Chan and his son are coming over tomorrow for dinner. I forgot to say.”

Jisung rinsed his mouth out quickly and wiped his lips.

“For dinner?” he asked.

“Yeah. Remember I told you about my best friend?” Changbin said. “I invited him over to meet you.”

Jisung nodded and padded into his bedroom. Changbin followed as he wiggled down under the blankets. Changbin stood in the doorway for a minute and then came in and sat down on the edge of the bed. Jisung rolled onto his back and peeked up at him from under the covers.

“Did you have a good day today?” Changbin asked.

“Mm hm.” Jisung hid a yawn behind his hand.

“Good…” Changbin whispered. 

He waited for a moment and Jisung blinked up at him expectantly.

“Does your dad give you a goodnight kiss?” Changbin asked him.

Jisung shook his head. Changbin wanted to do something to show how much he cared beyond just words but he wanted to make sure Jisung was okay with it.

“No.” Jisung answered.

“Can I give you a goodnight kiss?” Changbin asked.

Jisung nodded, feeling expectant.

Changbin placed his hand gently on Jisung’s chest first and closed his eyes. He stayed like that for a moment and then opened them again. Jisung stayed still, his eyes studying Changbin closely.

“Goodnight Jisung.” he smiled and then leaned forward and pressed his lips against Jisung’s forehead for a moment.

He leaned back and smiled down at him, brushing his hair back behind his ear. Jisung just stared back. He had never been kissed goodnight. He decided it felt kind of good. He kind of wanted Changbin to do it again but he stood up and adjusted the blankets before heading out of the room.

Jisung lay still for a minute and then reached up and brushed his fingers across his forehead where Changbin had kissed him. It made him feel…safe. He knew Changbin was just outside of his room if he needed anything.

With that thought he turned over and pulled his puppy plushie close. Within minutes, he was fast asleep.

The next day Jisung hid in the kitchen when Chan arrived. Of course he had to go out and say hi but he was suddenly super nervous. He could hear Changbin greet him and their footsteps into the living room.

“Chan’s here!” Changbin poked his head into the kitchen and then motioned for him to follow. 

Jisung still lingered for a minute and then came out of the kitchen and into the living room. Changbin waved him closer with a smile.

He stood next to Changbin and leaned against him a bit shyly.

“Jisung, this is Chan.” he introduced.

Jisung drew back from Changbin as Chan smiled at him brightly. Something about him seemed so nice that Jisung felt some of his anxiety drift away. When he held out a fist, Jisung let a smile slip out and bumped his fist with him.

“I’m glad to finally meet you!” Chan said. “I’m sorry I haven’t been able to visit for a while.”

He pouted a little at the end and Jisung looked up at Changbin with a smile. Chan was definitely nice, Jisung decided. He didn’t have the fake voice that many people used with him. He seemed genuine. Young kids sometimes were the best judges of that.

“Why don’t you say hi to Minho?” Changbin gently patted Jisung on the back. Jisung felt shy again.

“Jisung, this is Minho!” Chan pointed at the boy next to him who looked up. 

“Hi.” Minho didn’t spare Jisung a second glance and looked back down at what he was holding.

“Hi…” Jisung trailed off and then returned to Changbin’s side. He bumped his forehead against Changbin’s hip shyly to avoid looking at the others. Changbin patted his head.

“Should we eat dinner now? It’s ready.” Changbin gestured into the dining room.

Jisung stayed silent as they ate. He couldn’t stop staring at Minho. Apparently, Minho went to the same school he did. 

“Jisung!” Chan caught his attention with an excited look. “Changbin told me that you have a music class at school.”

Jisung blushed furiously and looked down at his plate.

“Yeah… it’s fun.” he said shyly.

“Do you get to learn to play any instruments?” Chan asked further.

“Guitar.” Jisung looked back up at him. “I practice it at school.”

“That’s pretty cool!” Chan gave him a thumbs up.

Jisung gave him one back and it sealed the deal. They were decidedly friends. Sometimes it was easy for kids to make friends, especially with engaging adults. But other times it was hard. Jisung thought it was hard with Minho.

Later that evening they played a board game. Jisung had never played so he was a little confused. He sat next to Minho and Chan. He kind of wanted to ask Changbin what to do but he didn’t want to show how lost he was.

He put a card down to play and Minho huffed in frustration next to him.

“You can’t play that one.” he handed the card back to Jisung.

“Oh…” Jisung fumbled with the cards in his hand, not sure what to do.

“Play a card that matches this.” Changbin tapped the board as if that was helpful.

Jisung set down another card and sat back, glad his turn was over.

“You can’t just pick a random card.” Minho said irritably. “You can’t play this one either.”

He gave the card back to Jisung who just wanted it to be over. He kept his head down, bangs falling into his eyes as he studied his cards closely.

“It’s okay Jisung.” Changbin spoke up. “Do you want me to help you?”

Jisung shook his head but his hand trembled a bit when he slowly put another card down.

Minho opened his mouth to say something but Chan tapped him on the shoulder and gave him a stern look. Jisung still understood and retracted the card back and set his hand on the table.

“I don’t want to play anymore.” he mumbled.

“You have to play!” Minho said immediately. “Otherwise it messes up the rotation!”

“He doesn’t have to play if he doesn’t want to.” Chan countered Minho.

“Here.” Minho put the cards back in Jisung’s hand and scooted over so he was sitting right next to him. “I’ll help you.”

Jisung grasped the cards again, letting Minho shifted some cards around. Minho tapped one and gestured for him to put it down.

Jisung obeyed and glanced at Changbin for approval. He nodded and raised an eyebrow to make sure he was okay with still playing. Jisung guessed he didn’t mind.

Whenever it was his turn, Minho would study his options carefully and then whisper in Jisung’s ear what he suggested. It still didn’t make sense but it made Jisung feel less shy when Minho would get excited and pat him on the back as if he had done something on his own.

He thought Minho was kind of intimidating and kind of nice at the same time. He was really smart. He won the game but he gave Jisung a high five anyways.

When they left, Jisung waved them goodbye. He hoped they would come over again.

Jisung loved to watch Changbin cook. The kitchen had a bar where people could sit on one side and the whoever was cooking could prepare food on the other. Jisung loved to sit on his knees on the stool and watch Changbin. Changbin would usually just talk to him and ask him questions while letting him taste test of course.

“Would you like to help me?” Changbin asked tonight.

Jisung perked up in excitement and hopped off of the stool to stand next to him. He wasn’t quite tall enough to reach the counter comfortably so Changbin pulled over the footstool that was by the sink.

“I’m going to pour the flour in here and you can hold the handle and shake it.” Changbin explained. “That way all the clumps are broken up.”

Jisung nodded solemnly and gripped the handle of the sieve. Changbin poured in flour and he shook it carefully over the bowl, his tongue poking out in concentration.

“Good job!” Changbin praised him and Jisung smiled proudly. “Do you want to crack the eggs too?”

Cracking the eggs was a little harder since Jisung was scared to crack it hard against the side of the bowl. He would tap it and then check it but it had no cracks. Finally he got it to crack and opened it over the bowl. Changbin only had to fish out a few pieces of shell.

After he washed his hands, Changbin let him roll out the dough they had made and cut it into pieces to fill with the meat he had cooked. He took the meat and put it in a bowl with some other ingredients but there was no space on the counter to set it down.

“Can you hold this for a moment?” Changbin asked.

Jisung held the glass bowl in his hands as Changbin made space on the counter to set it down. Though the meat had cooled a bit, the bowl had been sitting by the stove and had become hot. Jisung’s hands started to burn and he wanted to set it down but kept holding it. The heat transferred to his hands and he bit his lip.

“Thank you.” Changbin finally took it from his hands.

Jisung pressed his hands against his thighs, the tingling sensation still present. Changbin noticed and pressed his hand against the side of the bowl to check.

“Was it hot?” he asked and grabbed Jisung’s wrists. He turned his hands over so he could see his red palms. They weren’t burned but they stung a bit.

“Oh my goodness, I’m so sorry sweetheart!” Changbin sounded instantly worried. “I didn’t know it was hot still!”

“It’s okay.” Jisung replied. He knew Changbin didn’t do it on purpose.

“Ouch, I didn’t mean to hurt you.” Changbin raised Jisung’s hands to his lips and pressed a gentle kiss on each palm. “I’m so sorry.”

“I’m okay.” Jisung smiled to make him feel better.

Changbin ran a washcloth under cold water and pressed it to Jisung’s hands.

“If something is hurting you, I want you to tell me.” Changbin said. “I don’t want you to stay quiet because you think you have to. If something hurts you then say something.”

Jisung nodded, feeling slightly surprised by his words. He wasn’t used to adults caring about how he was feeling.

“And if anything bothers you in here.” Changbin tapped his chest over his heart. “You don’t have to tell me everything, but if I do something wrong you can let me know, okay?”

“Okay.” Jisung nodded again, sensing that Changbin was serious.

“Okay deal.” Changbin smiled and rumpled his hair.

Jisung still was confused sometimes when Changbin did some things, but it was never a bad experience. If anything, he found himself gravitating towards Changbin more and more every day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! I would like to say a little bit about the relationship between Jisung and Changbin. Every situation is different, especially in foster care with so many different families and kids. Some kids struggle a lot with their foster families and don’t feel like they belong. Others become attached to their family. In this case, Jisung quickly becomes attached and starts to have some internal struggle feeling torn between his biological father and Changbin. Not sure if that was clear since Jisung’s internal thoughts don’t process this yet.  
> If Jisung seems a bit young for eleven, or acts in ways that younger children do, that’s on purpose! Like I said, some children swing towards being strongly independent and act older, while others haven’t developed as much and act younger than their age. A lot of his affectionate behavior is also common for children who never experienced such things so they crave it more.  
> Lastly! Now that I have introduced the first two major characters, let me know how I did and if you like their personality representations! Let me know if you have any questions or comments! Will be updated every other day. 10 chapters total.
> 
> BEING REWRITTEN TO ADJUST CHARACTER NAMES


	3. Chan

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! In this chapter we shift to another household! The third POV out of four! This time it’s Chan! I also have an original character in this chapter that I added in because she really fit! Especially with Minho struggling with a father figure, I wanted to give a strong mother character that he connected with. It’s pretty cute!  
> TW: Past domestic abuse, anxiety, nightmares.

Chan was woken up for the second night in a row by sounds coming from the room next to his bedroom. It seemed to have become more frequent which bothered Chan.

“Mm…What is it?” Ara asked him sleepily as she felt him swing his legs out of bed.

“Just Minho.” Chan quickly shrugged on a shirt and padded into the hall, shutting their door behind him.

Ara was a heavy sleeper so she usually didn’t wake up in the night. Chan was a light sleeper which meant every time Minho had a nightmare, he heard it. 

He opened the door to Minho’s room slowly and sure enough, the boy was tangled up in his blankets, his head turning from one side to the other when Chan stepped inside. It made Chan’s heart ache every time.

“Minho.” Chan sat on the edge of the bed and rubbed his shoulder. “Wake up bud.”

After a few moments, Minho woke up, and per the usual, began to cry.

“Shh…” Chan gently worked to untangle him from the blankets. “You’re okay.”

Once Minho wasn’t constricted by his covers, Chan lifted him enough to tuck him against his chest and hug him close.

“You’re safe.” Chan reassured him. “I’m here and you’re perfectly safe.”

The way that Chan comforted Minho from his nightmares was drastically different from how he interacted with him in the daytime.

Minho was a tough kid. He had truly grown up in the worst situation imaginable. When Chan got his placement call, he honestly had second thoughts. He had to reconsider if him and Ara were ready for the responsibility that came with a child that carried such a dark background.

It was Ara mostly that convinced him to take Minho in. If they felt they weren’t able to provide for him physically or mentally, they could always contact the state and send him back, though Chan hated thinking of that. It seemed like it would be mentally damaging to the child, especially since Minho had already lived in three homes.

The first night Minho had stayed with them, Chan sobbed in their room for almost an hour. Out of love. It was an impossible feeling to describe, but he truly fell in love with Minho when he saw him. His heart reached out in compassion and empathy in ways he had never experienced before.

But it was hard. So hard that he began to question many days if he had made the right decision. Minho let Chan hold him at night when he was distressed from a nightmare. It was the time he was most vulnerable and needed someone to anchor him down and remind him he was safe.

Yet, in the day, he pushed Chan away at every opportunity. He was more open to Ara and seemed to listen to her more. When it came to Chan, he was fiercely defiant and closed off. Many times angry.

“It’s not your fault.” Ara had consoled him. “He’s never had a positive father figure. He’s just trying to protect himself.”

Chan tried not to take it personally but it still weighed on him. Minho was only twelve years old and sometimes he had the cold hardness of a man in him. It was hard for Chan to watch, having been in a similar position before. 

He himself had been a foster child, but not nearly in such a rough situation. His parents eventually just didn’t care enough anymore and lost custody. It hurt and he missed his mom, but he had good adoptive parents.

Minho’s mother was not present and his father incarcerated. Minho even lacked visits with his father since he was in jail. Though from the nightmares, maybe less interaction was better for him.

“I’ve never dealt with anything like this.” Chan had said to Changbin over the phone late one night. “Domestic violence is something I don’t even know how to relate to. How am I supposed to help him process it?”

“It sounds so unhelpful, but you have to take time.” Changbin consoled him. “Every child is different and every child internalizes and processes it differently. Don’t try to rush him into anything until you know how he will let you in.”

Chan didn’t know how to get Minho to let him in. That’s why he treasured the moments when Minho let him hold him and stroke his hair and whisper comforts to him. They never spoke of them in the morning but they happened and Chan hoped they made a difference somehow.

Minho was sensitive deep down. Sometimes Chan could forget it and be reminded just moments later. 

“You have one minute to be ready.” Chan warned Minho from the door of his bedroom. “Otherwise, we’ll be late.”

He left Minho sitting on his bed with his arms crossed. Getting Minho to go to school was a weird tightrope to walk. Many days he didn’t care at all. But when he didn’t want to go, he would do everything in his power not to go.

This morning, Chan was already at the end of his patience. He was tired and he would be late for work if they didn’t hurry and leave.

“Breakfast is ready.” Ara pulled him over to kiss him as she pulled out plates.

“Minho is not ready.” Chan sighed and looped his arm around her waist. “I don’t know what to do at this point.”

“I’ll go talk to him.” Ara smiled. “Are you going to the store after you pick him up?”

“Yeah, need anything?” Chan asked.

“I’ll text you the list so you don’t forget.” Ara said as she headed upstairs.

Chan sat to eat breakfast while she talked to Minho. She did real estate so she wasn’t home much in the day. Chan alternated from being at work or working from home. Since his job was more flexible, he drove Minho to and from school.

Chan headed back upstairs when he was done. They would definitely be late at this point. He paused outside of Minho’s room when he heard them talking.

“Why does it feel weird?” Ara was asking Minho.

“Because they know.” Minho replied. “They know about my dad.”

“I see…” Ara said.

“It’s not like I care though.” Minho sounds nonchalant but it was obvious he was just saying it to hide his discomfort. 

Chan dropped his head, feeling compassion for him all over again. He couldn’t imagine having a father who was in prison. 

They left the house twenty minutes late but Chan didn’t say anything. 

Ara and him talked to two of their therapist friends in order to be able to understand what Minho was going through better. His sleeping disturbances were common as well as his struggle going to school for many children witness to domestic violence.

Chan and Ara’s goals were to help Minho reverse the psychological damage that he had sustained for most of his life. It was a very long journey which Chan knew would be hard.

Ara connected with Minho almost immediately. She just had a way with him that Chan envied. He got home from work one day to find both of them sprawled on the couch watching a nature documentary in their pajamas. 

Minho loved the documentaries as much as Ara did. Especially the ones about big cats. One time, Ara and him had spent all dinner talking about tigers.

Chan shrugged off his jacket and walked into the living room.

“Sorry I’m late.” He leaned over the couch to give Ara a kiss. “Which one are you watching tonight?”

“Exotic birds.” Ara replied while tossing a piece of popcorn in her mouth.

“Thrilling.” Chan said teasingly.

He promptly got smacked by a pillow. Ara and him had been best friends long before getting married. There were no holds barred with them in the best way.

She had been there for him when he had struggled most and he had promised to be there for her until the end of time. When she had told him she wanted to foster he was shocked. They had decided not to have kids right away since they were young.

But she had been adamant about fostering. Part of it had been Chan’s own experience that encouraged her that it was something she wanted to do. They both knew that fostering kids was not something just anyone could do. 

It was terribly complicated and much harder than raising your own child. Every kid came with their own background, struggles and even trauma. It was hard sometimes to be able to care for a child who wasn’t your own.

That night, Ara snuggled close to Chan and pressed her head against his chest. She loved to hear his heartbeat when falling asleep.

“We made the right decision.” She said softly into the dark.

“With what?” Chan responded.

“With Minho. Today especially I knew we made the right choice.” She answered.

“How do you know?” He rubbed her back with his hand.

“He’s just becoming so much happier and seems like he’s trying really hard with school and friends.” Ara elaborated. “Therapy is going well and I feel like I’ve gotten to know him better.”

“Mm.” Chan hummed, rubbing her back absentmindedly.

“I know it doesn’t feel the same way for you.” She shifted her head to tuck against his neck. “But there’s so much hope. I see it so clearly. He won’t be so closed off from you forever.”

“How long do you think I have to wait?” Chan said it jokingly but he was genuinely curious as well.

“He talked to me about you today.” Ara answered. “I was… really surprised.”

“What did he say?” Chan’s hand stilled between her shoulder blades.

She was quiet for a minute, like she was thinking through what to share.

“He asked me if you ever hurt me.” She finally said quietly. “He seemed genuinely concerned about it.”

Chan stayed quiet. The words hurt more than he expected even though he understood where they came from.

“When I told him no, he had a hard time believing me.” She continued. “He asked about what we do when we fight and seemed honestly confused about how… kind we are to each other.”

When Chan still didn’t say anything, Ara patted his chest and drew back a little.

“It bothers you doesn’t it?” She asked.

“Of course it bothers me.” Chan replied quietly. “A kid shouldn’t have to be concerned about those things. He shouldn’t be… afraid of me for the reasons he is.”

“You’re right. But that’s not what we can focus on.” She nodded against him. “Remember what my friend said?”

“You can’t change the past. You can only heal the present.” Chan sighed.

“It’s not you. I can tell deep down he doesn’t want it to be you either.” Ara ran her fingertips up and down his chest soothingly. “He’s just scared. He just wants to know that he can feel safe around you.”

“I know…” Chan pulled her closer. “I’m doing my best as well. It’s hard for me too.”

“If anyone can show him what a good father is, it’s you.” Ara comforted him. “You two will get there.”

They were interrupted by a soft sound from the other room. Chan turned his head and lay still, his ears attentive for another noise.

“He’ll let you do this much for him.” Ara said as he slipped out of bed. “It’s a start.”

Chan didn’t fully understand how Minho could allow him so close after a nightmare but not at any other time. Regardless, he still embraced the moment.

But tonight was different. He usually comforted Minho until he drifted back to sleep but didn’t talk to him more than that. Tonight he wanted to let Minho know that he hadn’t given up.

“You’re here in your room where it’s safe.” Chan consoled him.

Minho sniffled against his shoulder and took a few deep breaths.

“Minho.” Chan said. “I…”

He didn’t know how to say what he wanted to. He didn’t know if Minho was able to receive it.

“It’s okay to be afraid.” He finally said. “But I’ll never intentionally hurt you in any way. I just… wanted you to know.”

It wasn’t the most eloquent and Chan wasn’t sure if Minho would take it to heart but he said it anyways. Minho didn’t respond but he became quiet faster than usual. Chan hoped it meant something.

The first time Minho showed some effort with Chan was when he was struggling with homework one night. 

Minho was committed to getting good grades like no one Chan had seen before. He was almost obsessed with getting a perfect grade. That’s why his struggle with homework made him so discouraged.

Chan didn’t even attempt to offer his help to Minho, knowing he wouldn’t accept it. Ara sat with him instead, studying the problem closely.

“I was never all that good at math…” She admitted. “Why doesn’t Chan help you? He is much better at solving math problems.”

Ara and Chan switched places so he could look at it. As he had expected, Minho pulled his books closer to himself and dropped his gaze.

“I can figure it out on my own.” He muttered.

Chan almost got up again but Ara subtly held her hand out to indicate he should stay.  
She left them there at the table and began to tackle the dishes in the sink. Chan sat quietly next to Minho. He honestly felt awkward, not sure what he was doing sitting there if Minho had rejected his help.

Minho’s eyebrows drew together in concentration and a little frustration. Chan noticed he had a habit of chewing on the end of his pen when he was focused on something. His patience and determination was admirable.

His concentration was broken by him bringing his pen down and letting out a small breath. He didn’t look at Chan, but pushed his book over so Chan could see it. 

It was a small allowance. A simple gesture. To Chan it meant the world because it was one way Minho was letting him draw close. He was so fiercely independent that any way that he asked for help was a big step.

Chan didn’t comment at first and looked over the problem quietly. Minho gave him his pen and notebook when Chan held his hand out for it.

The minutes stretched on as Chan solved it and then checked it against the solution.

“Here. I’ll show you how to do it.” Chan turned the notebook back towards Minho and began to walk him through it.

It was a really basic interaction but it left Chan feeling excited and hopeful. Trust was built slowly and in the little ways.

The hope he had seemed to vanish when he got a call from the principal’s office just two days later.

“He got into a bit of a confrontation with a student.” The principal pressed his hands together on top of his desk. “Luckily it wasn’t physical but a teacher had to break it up since it became quite… aggressive.”

“I see.” Chan pressed his hands against his thighs. 

He hadn’t expected himself to be in a situation like this so he wasn’t sure what to say.

“The other student hasn’t been spoken to yet but I thought it would be best to involve you right away considering your… situation with Minho.” The principal gestured between Chan and Minho, who was sitting next to him with his arms crossed.

Chan frowned for a split second and then schooled his face into a neutral expression. Was he alluding to Minho being fostered?

“I have to say, there were some worrying things I need to address.” The principal leaned back in his chair and Chan’s heart sunk lower if it was possible. “Maybe Minho would like to tell you himself first?”

Chan looked to the boy next to him but Minho pointedly looked away.

“Please let me know the issue.” Chan addressed the principal.

“I’m still not sure how the conflict started since Minho hasn’t spoken a word since it happened.” The principal sent Minho a look that made Chan tense in his seat. 

“But they were in the hall when the teachers became aware of a verbal dispute.” Chan hated the way the man relayed the information in such a detached fashion. “The other student seemed to back off and didn’t engage while Minho kept shouting at him.”

“Shouting?” Chan didn’t mean for the question to slip out. He was just surprised that Minho had raised his voice. He had never seen anything other than a mellow side of Minho.

“Yes.” The principal shifted almost uncomfortably. “Now I know this must be hard to deal with as a… guardian in this situation. But there are rules that students must follow regardless of their background.”

Chan frowned openly this time and noticed Minho averting his gaze to the floor.

“Can we talk about this without Minho here?” Chan asked. “He can wait outside.”  
The principal nodded and let Minho leave before leaning forward and addressing Chan more seriously.

“To resolve with the other student, I can explain that Minho is in a unique situation.” The principal said. “I have a feeling they will understand if they know he’s a foster child.”

“I want to know exactly what happened.” Chan stopped him.

The principal nodded and relayed everything that had taken place to Chan. When he finished, Chan dropped his head for a moment to compose his thoughts.

“I will gladly speak with the parents of the other child.” He finally said. “I’ll be involved in the process of resolving this as much as needed.”

Chan was beyond relieved to finally walk out of the office. Minho was sitting outside waiting for him. 

“Get your things.” Chan said quietly.

He didn’t know what to say to Minho yet. He felt like he needed to process for a bit longer. Minho hadn’t physically hurt the other student but his words had been harsh and they honestly shocked Chan. They had a bite that a twelve-year-old shouldn’t be able to deliver, not to mention the words he had uttered that were certainly banned in the school due to their language policy.

Chan was silent, driving Minho home. He ran his fingers over his chin, lost in his thoughts. By the time they got home he had one pressing question.

“Why did you say those things?” He asked as they sat in the driveway.

Minho sat silently in the passenger seat. His fingers played with the hem of his jacket nervously.

“I just want to understand what made you feel you needed to defend yourself to that student.” Chan pulled one leg up onto the seat and shifted to look at Minho.

“He was just talking about my dad.” Minho muttered and looked out the window.  
Chan had expected it to be something like that. The outburst had been strong enough to mean there was a significant trigger.

“I don’t know what to do.”

Chan’s admission hung heavy between them and Minho looked at him in surprise.

“You can’t say those things to anyone. Ever.” Chan told him. “I’m not sure what the other kid’s parents will say but… you’re in trouble. Even if they drop it, there has to be some type of discipline.”

Chan’s heart squeezed painfully at the thought. He had no idea what to do to resolve the issue. Minho just hung his head and kept fiddling with his jacket.

“I’ll think about it.” Chan settled with saying. He couldn’t think of any way to show Minho that his actions would have consequences.

Minho went inside first and Chan leaned his forehead on the steering wheel in defeat.

As soon as he got in the house Ara approached him.

“What did you say to him?” She asked first.

“It’s a mess.” Chan groaned and tossed his jacket aside. “He basically cussed out this student and a teacher had to break it up.”

“So… what did you say?” She searched his eyes and put her hand on his arm.

“What am I supposed to say?” Chan whispered harshly; the stress evident in his voice. “I told him I would… think of something.”

“What do you mean think of something?” She asked.

“A consequence for what he did.” Chan rubbed his hand over his face. “I have absolutely no idea what to do!”

“Did you ask him about it? Or hear his side?” Ara asked worriedly.

“Of course I did.” Chan shrugged. “Well, I asked him why but he didn’t say much.”

Ara bit her thumb anxiously, mirroring how Chan felt. Chan sat on the couch, leaning his head against the back. After a minute, Ara sat beside him and pulled one leg up under her to face him.

“How we handle this is really important.” She said quietly. “We have to be sensitive to how he’s feeling while still letting him know there are rules.”

“Exactly. But how can I do that?” Chan tilted his head to look at her.

“I don’t know exactly but we have to be careful.” Ara said sincerely. “I could tell when he walked in here that he already feels bad.”

Chan could tell Minho felt bad too. Dinner was tense and Chan felt even more defeated after it. He didn’t even want to stay in the kitchen while Minho washed the dishes.

“I’ll finish them.” Chan set a bowl down next to the sink. “You can go do your homework.”

Minho stepped away from the sink but stayed standing there with his head down and his bangs falling in his eyes. It took him a moment to really break down.

“Ah…” Chan froze as Minho started crying. 

He was almost silent but his shoulder shook and his sniffles betrayed his tears.

Chan reached out to touch his arm but he flinched away, bringing his arms up to wrap around himself.

“Oh honey…” Ara slipped between them and pulled Minho into a hug. “It’s okay.”

Chan headed upstairs. He thought it was better to give them space but he also couldn’t deal with all of the emotions whirling around within him. Most of all, he felt bad.

He had always been an empathetic person. Seeing Minho struggling made him want to fix it. But it wasn’t something he could fix with a snap of his fingers. Each day settled like a weight in his chest, piling up, and he didn’t know how to relieve the pressure.

He paced the bedroom for close to an hour before heading back downstairs.

“He’s not angry at you.” Ara was sitting next to Minho on the couch. 

Chan stilled at the base of the stairs.

“Yes he is.” Minho sniffled and rubbed at his eyes. “He’s going to punish me.”

“That doesn’t mean he’s angry at you.” Ara brushed his hair out of his eyes tenderly. “And he doesn’t want to hurt you or make you feel bad.”

“I deserve it.” Minho’s lip trembled as he tried not to cry again.

Chan walked towards them slowly, making his presence known.

Minho immediately sat a little straighter and wiped his face with his sleeve in an attempt to hide the tear stains on his cheeks.

“Hey…” Chan sat down on the coffee table in front of Minho.

There was no anger or frustration in him. He only wanted to be gentle and relieve Minho’s fears.

“I’m not angry.” He said first. “And… I’m not going to discipline you.”

Ara snapped her gaze to him at that, a question evident in her eyes. Chan knew that having clear boundaries was imperative but, in this situation, he knew he couldn’t let Minho suffer twice.

“I think you’ve been punished enough.” Chan said. “I know you feel bad.”

Minho sniffled and nodded slightly.

“I was too harsh in the car.” Chan apologized. “You’re not in trouble with me. I just wanted to make sure you knew the severity of the situation.”

Chan gazed deep into his eyes to convey his emotions intently.

“I should have asked you your side of the story.” He continued. “I’m sorry I wasn’t as receptive as I should have been. You don’t have to tell me what happened but I’ll hear it if you choose and won’t punish you for it.”

Minho pressed his hands against his lap anxiously and took a while to respond. Chan was patient and open to if he chose to share or not.

“H-he said that since my dad is a criminal… I can’t be around them.” Minho said quietly.

Chan nodded slowly. He felt the hurtful words as if they had been said to him.

“They said…” Minho glanced up at Chan for a brief moment. “That they were afraid of me because I’m bad too.”

Next to him, Ara bit her lip hard enough to drain the color from it. Chan also clenched his jaw, trying to keep his expression neutral.

“They said one day I would be in jail because…” Minho trailed off.

“Because what?” Chan asked softly when he didn’t finish.

“Because evil things come for me at night.” Minho finished quietly.

Chan tilted his head and frowned in confusion. The last part didn’t make sense to him. What evil things came at night?

“Evil things?” He asked.

“I thought they were my friends.” Minho wrung his hands together. “So I told them about my nightmares…”

“Oh…” Chan ran his hand through his hair. “They should never have said those things Minho.”

“They’re true.” Minho replied and his brown eyes looked impossibly hopeless as they gazed at Chan. “I yelled at him because I knew he was right and… it scared me.”

Chan was surprised that Minho was so honest.

“You aren’t a bad person. And your nightmares aren’t your fault.” Ara spoke. “They’re just your brain trying to process honey. There’s nothing wrong with that.”

“What they said is not acceptable.” Chan assured him. “It’s not the truth.”

“I’m sorry.” Minho said softly.

“It’s okay.” Chan reached his hand out but hesitated, checking if it was okay to touch Minho. He froze for a moment and then nodded.

Chan pressed his hand against Minho’s arm and rubbed his thumb back and forth comfortingly. He didn’t want Minho to feel bad anymore. He had obviously been hurt by the other child. Chan didn’t want to condone his behavior, but he wanted him to know he was going to be okay.

Ara put her arm around him and talked him through it more while Chan listened. It didn’t feel like a victory to either of them but in reality, it was the first real dispute they had resolved with Minho. Chan didn’t know yet but it carried a lot of weight for Minho.

That night, Minho didn’t have a nightmare. It could have been that they were all so exhausted at the end of the long day, but Chan hoped it was because he felt a little safer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Minho is the opposite of Jisung. Instead of seeking comfort through drawing close, he turns to self-comfort and is anxious to let himself be open. A significant number of kids in foster care are placed there because their parent or parents are in jail. If no other relative claims them, they will be placed with a family. Also there are no visits between Minho and his father since he is serving a sentence in prison. I don’t have a backstory to him being in prison, if anyone was curious, it isn’t relevant to the story.  
> Chan’s reaction to Minho’s conflict at school wasn’t necessarily perfect but no parent is perfect! What I really wanted to focus on was them working through figuring everything out after it occurred! Hopefully it was okay!  
> Let me know if you have any questions or comments! Will be updated every other day. 10 chapters total.


	4. Minho

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone! Welcome to another chapter! This one is truly a roller coaster so be prepared! I feel like Minho’s character is hardest to write for me but that just means I am super determined to get him right! I would love to know your thoughts now that the four main characters have been introduced!  
> TW: Nightmares, Bullying, Vomiting (non-descriptive)

Minho avoided the boys who he had thought were his friends at school. He hated the guilty feeling he got every time he saw them. Instead of eating lunch with them, he ate lunch in the outside seating area.

It was a little lonely, but it was better than having to be around so many other people. Sometimes he felt so tired of being around anyone.

Yet, he didn’t want to be truly alone. Maybe that was why he stood up and walked to a different table when he spotted a familiar head of brown hair and light blue sneakers.

He didn’t say anything as he sat across from Jisung. He was also sitting alone. 

Minho could feel Jisung’s wide eyes staring at him as he sat and unwrapped his sandwich. He didn’t really know Jisung. He had only interacted with him a few times at Woojin’s house. He seemed awfully shy.

They sat in silence and when the lunch bell rang, they didn’t exchange a word. Jisung watched Minho pack up and leave first. Even though they hadn’t had a conversation, it felt like there was a silent agreement that it was okay. It was better than being alone.

Jisung sat in the same place every day so Minho started sitting there as well. It was almost strange how they ate together but didn’t say anything. But to Minho it was calming in a way.

On Wednesday, Jisung surprised Minho by reaching across the table and tapping him lightly on the arm.

“What?” Minho asked.

In response, Jisung slid a cookie wrapped in plastic wrap towards him.

“I made it.” Jisung explained shyly. “For you.”

“Oh.” Minho held it in his hand thoughtfully. “Um, thank you.”

Jisung smiled brightly and withdrew his own hand, looking relieved.

“Do you want to be friends?’ Jisung asked simply and directly.

Minho blinked back at him. He was taken a little off guard. He had really only thought of Jisung as a lunch companion. A friend seemed like… a lot.

“I don’t know.” Minho answered honestly.

“Okay!” Jisung shrugged, not seeming bothered. “I’ll ask you again tomorrow.”

He asked Minho the next day and the next. He didn’t seem disappointed when Minho responded the same way. He supposed it was because it wasn’t a hard no.

To Minho, it wasn’t much of a problem. Jisung sat with him whether he agreed to be friends or not. He had become more talkative. He did most of the chatting and Minho listened, though it still felt as if they were having a conversation.

Minho enjoyed being with Jisung. Until he didn’t. The shift happened after one of his therapy sessions when Ara was talking with his counselor. He wasn’t purposely trying to eavesdrop, it just happened.

“Developing positive relationships or keeping relationships will be harder.” She was saying. “Most likely, he will cycle through friends or have just a few.”

Her statement made an uncomfortable feeling settle in his stomach.

“Engaging in as many community building activities as possible is a great step.” Ara nodded her head at the suggestion. “I’ll send you an email with some local options.”

Minho didn’t like the thought that he wasn’t good at making or keeping friends. It made him feel defiant against the thought. He could have many friends if he wanted.

On Monday, when he went to school, he fell back into the friend group he had before the argument. He didn’t even have to apologize further, he just slipped into the group. They didn’t really care. And there were new friends that started hanging out with them.

Their group was so big that sitting together for lunch was too hard, especially in the crowded inside seating area. So they moved outside.

Minho was walking along with his friends when someone tugged on his sleeve. He stopped and glanced behind him to see Jisung.

“Hi.” Jisung raised his hand and then quickly tucked it behind his back.

“Hi.” Minho returned the greeting awkwardly.

“Do you… want to eat lunch together?” Jisung asked, gesturing to where they usually sat.

“I’m eating with my friends today.” Minho poked his thumb back towards his group and started walking backwards towards them.

“Okay.” Jisung waved again, this time a bit more shyly.

Minho turned away and jogged back to his friends. It was fun being in the big group, except that he didn’t get to contribute much with the loudest voices getting the most attention.

He was surprised when Jisung came up to him the next day. This time with his backpack still on. He tucked his thumbs under the straps and fell into place next to Minho.

“Hi.” He greeted as usual.

Minho dipped his head and kept walking along with his group, but Jisung stayed by his side. When Minho turned his head to look at him, he perked up.

“What are you eating for lunch today?” He asked.

“I… can’t remember.” Minho glanced at his friends who were starting to sit down at an empty table. 

There wouldn’t be room for Jisung, or Minho for that matter if he didn’t grab a spot.

“I’ve gotta go now.” Minho said and quickly found a seat.

He purposely didn’t look at Jisung until the younger boy had walked away. He felt a twinge of guilt but brushed it aside. Surely Jisung had other friends he could spend time with. 

Sometimes he felt a tiny bit of longing for someone to pay attention to him like Jisung did instead of having to fight for it. But Jisung was only one friend and he wanted to have a bunch of friends. He wanted to fit in. Jisung was a grade below him and hanging out with someone younger wasn’t cool.

He enjoyed talking about his friends at the dinner table when Ara or Chan asked how his day was. He was happy when they all sat together laughing or talking.

He expected Jisung to back off after a couple of tries, but he was surprisingly persistent. He seemed to always be waiting for Minho during lunch so he could walk with him and try to get him to sit with him.

“I like your shoes.” Jisung commented as soon as he fell into step with Minho.

“Thanks.” Minho mumbled.

“Are you eating with your friends again today?” Jisung asked.

“Yeah. I am.” Minho wanted to roll his eyes. He always ate with them now.

“I was wondering if you had thought of an answer to my question.” Jisung lengthened his stride to keep up with Minho.

“Huh?” Minho stopped next to his friends as they debated which table to sit at.

“Do you want to be my friend?” Jisung looked at him innocently and Minho’s mouth opened to tell him yet again that he didn’t know.

“Did he just ask you to be his friend?” His friend asked from behind him with an amused tone.

Minho turned towards his friends. His ears heated up as the attention shifted to him.

“You’re that kid that’s been hanging around.” His other friend pointed at Jisung.

“Sit with us!” Another boy motioned him over.

Jisung pointed to himself incredulously.

“Yes you! Come on!”

He was pulled over to a seat and Minho sat across from him. As usual, everyone started talking and joking around.

The boy next to Minho tapped on his arm and cupped his hand against his mouth to whisper in his ear.

“Tell him to bring us banana milk.” He told Minho.

“Who?” Minho looked at him, confused.

“The boy who follows you around!” He whispered back as if it was obvious. “He’ll do it if you say.”

“I don’t have money.” Minho replied.

“So? Have him pay for it.” The boy replied as if it was obvious.

Minho stared back at him, surprised that he would suggest such a thing. Was it because Jisung seemed so compliant to Minho? It didn’t seem kind.

But now, two of the others were looking at him expectantly like they expected him to do it. He didn’t want to disappoint them or make them angry again.

“Jisung.” He called out, suddenly hating the sound of his own voice.

The younger boy looked at him with those stupid puppy dog eyes that Minho decided he didn’t like either. He looked away as he spoke.

“Go get us banana milk.” He said.

“Okay!” Jisung stood up eagerly and then waited. “Um… who wants one?”

Everyone raised their hand except Minho. Jisung hesitantly stretched out his hand for money. They laughed at his action.

“You have money, don’t you?” One of Minho’s friends asked.

“A-a little…” Jisung replied.

“Then do us a favor!” He smiled afterwards but Jisung stayed still, looking torn.

“You want to be Minho’s friend, don’t you?” He prompted. “This is what friends do.”

Jisung looked at Minho who glanced away. He felt guilty for making Jisung use his own money to pay for their drinks.

“I’ll get as many as I can.” Jisung finally agreed and got up to retrieve the banana milk.

“This is great!” One boy said to Minho when he left. “You didn’t tell us you had a little follower!”

Minho swallowed uncomfortably and didn’t answer. Something didn’t sit right with him about taking advantage of Jisung like this. His friends liked it though so he guessed it was okay.

It wasn’t just a one-time occurrence. Jisung was allowed to sit with them but they asked him to do things for them. Minho was uncomfortable at first but he slowly started to not care as much. The more he told Jisung what to do, the more the others accepted him into their group. He was surprised how much they included him now that he did what they wanted. Instead of being on the outskirts of the group, he was at the center.

Jisung didn’t have to sit alone anymore since they let him in. He was in the position Minho had been in just a few weeks prior. Minho justified his actions by reasoning that at least he was a part of the group even if he barely was allowed to interact.

Jisung didn’t complain or say anything, though, he seemed awfully quiet. He tried hard to sit next to Minho but Minho always avoided him. When Jisung showed hesitancy to do what they wanted, he offered a spot next to himself as an incentive. It was kind of thrilling to have power over someone just by being himself.

But the illusion came crashing down when Chan picked him up from school a month after Jisung first sat with their group.

Minho was walking with his friends when Chan pulled up to the curb next to them. Minho didn’t have his backpack on since Jisung was carrying it. Jisung was carrying four of their backpacks. He had done his best to carry one on his front, and the rest on his arms. They were surely heavy but Minho had let him keep his own backpack on so it was fine.

He trailed behind them since it was harder to walk with the weight.

“Minho!” Chan called for him through the rolled down window of his car.

“I gotta go.” Minho waved to his friends and then grabbed his backpack from Jisung.

He felt a twinge of worry that Chan had seen Jisung carrying their bags but he shrugged it off and got in the car.

“Why was Jisung holding your backpack?” Chan asked when he buckled his seatbelt.

“Um… he lost a bet.” Minho made up an excuse.

Chan seemed to fall for it and didn’t press for more.

At dinner, Chan called Minho down a little earlier. Ara was already sitting at the table, looking down at her hands.

Chan set down his phone and gestured for Minho to sit. Something in his expression made Minho wary.

“I just got off the phone with Changbin.” Chan braced his hands on top of his chair.

Ara kept staring down at her hands, fiddling with her fingers while Chan looked bothered. Minho knew he was in trouble for something.

“He talked to Jisung because I asked him about what I saw earlier today.” Minho’s heart sank at his words.

“Jisung told him that you have been… telling him what to do at school.” Chan said quietly. “And that you’ve told him he can only sit with you if he does what you say.”

Chan waited for Minho’s answer.

“It’s nothing bad.” Minho replied nervously. “Sometimes I ask him to do a favor or something but I never force him to do anything.”

“Just because you didn’t force him to do it, doesn’t mean he is enjoying it.” Chan frowned. “From what Jisung said to Changbin, you promised him that if he did what you wanted then he could be friends with you.”

Ara lifted her head at that and her expression was so disappointed that Minho felt a wave of guilt.

“We are friends…” Minho said quietly.

Chan bit his lip but didn’t comment on his statement.

“How long has this been going on?” Chan asked.

“I don’t know… a month?” Minho answered.

“You’ve been doing this to Jisung for a month?” Chan leaned forward in shock.

“If he wanted to stop then he would have stopped!” Minho tried to defend himself. “I didn’t do anything he refused!”

“Minho!” Chan didn’t shout but it was obvious he was angry. He rubbed his hand over his face. “What don’t you understand?”

“He’s younger than you.” Ara cut in. “He probably doesn’t feel like he can say that he wants to stop. Did you ever ask him what he wanted?”

Minho stalled, knowing he hadn’t actually asked Jisung for his opinion or how he felt.

“He wanted to be your friend, Minho.” Chan continued. “He doesn’t have good boundaries and you took advantage of that. Do you see how that’s not kind? He only continued because he expects you to start being kind to him.”

“That’s not my fault.” Minho mumbled. “I don’t want to be friends with him.”

“You’re not going back to school.” Chan cut his hand through the air sharply.

“Ever?” Minho gasped.

“For the rest of the week until I decide how I’m going to handle this situation.” Chan replied. “And this time it’s not because I don’t know how to discipline you. I just want to do what’s best for Jisung.”

“Did you ever think about him when this was going on?” Ara asked him, seemingly genuinely concerned.

“Of course I did! He followed me around everywhere like an annoying puppy!” Minho crossed his arms.

From the look on Ara’s face, he hadn’t helped his case.

“You’re eating dinner and then going straight upstairs.” Chan said with a note of finality. “You’re only going to therapy and that’s it this week. No time with friends or anything like that.”

Minho kept his mouth shut, not wanting to dig his grave any deeper.

That week was pretty terrible. Minho got tired of spending time in his room really fast. He missed his friends, but now every time he thought of them, he felt guilty thinking of all the times Jisung had looked at him with his brown puppy dog eyes. He mostly felt guilty for all the times he had asked Jisung if he wanted to be his friend in order to get him to do something.

On Friday, Chan poked his head into his room after knocking on his door frame.

“Changbin and Jisung, will be coming over for dinner in an hour.” He informed Minho.

Minho sat up from where he had been laying on his bed in horror. Jisung was coming for dinner? He didn’t dare show his face.

“I expect you to be downstairs five minutes before they arrive.” Chan said as if he read his mind.

Minho bit back a groan and nodded tightly. He wanted to dig a hole and hide in it forever.

It was as awkward as he expected. Chan and Changbin were laughing and talking comfortably as soon as they walked in. Minho helped Ara carry platters of food outside because Chan was grilling and he wanted an excuse not to interact right away.

Jisung seemed to not want to talk to him either. He hovered close to Changbin and stole shy glances at Minho. 

“Minho! Come here!” Ara motioned him over with a smile. “Can you take these two pitchers and fill them with the lemonade and watermelonade I have in the fridge? Have Jisung help you.”

Minho quickly shook his head. 

“I can do it myself.” he refused.

“Nope, Jisung will help you.” She shook her head and called Jisung over.

Minho headed to the kitchen quickly. He wanted to get it over as soon as possible.

Jisung stood quietly to the side, holding his empty pitcher while Minho filled his own. Something about him just standing there irritated Minho. He was the reason that Minho didn’t get to see his friends.

“Did I really hurt your feelings?” Minho asked, but his tone was sarcastic.

Jisung stared back at him, his eyes searching his face for the answer he thought Minho wanted to hear. Finally he just looked down.

“I didn’t make you do anything.” Minho shrugged. “We were just having fun.”

Jisung didn’t respond to that either and just held out his pitcher for Minho to fill.

The night ended with Minho feeling even worse about the whole situation. He knew deep down that Jisung had been hurt. He just didn’t want to come to terms that he had been the one to do it.

When he returned to school, he was excited to rejoin his friends. He was shocked when one of his friends poked him in the chest when he got near.

“First you get me in trouble for talking about your dad, and now we don’t have Jisung anymore. You aren’t allowed to sit with us.”

Minho sat alone that day. His friends didn’t want him around. They didn’t care about him at all. Minho felt genuinely hurt even though he knew he had brought it on himself.

The next day, they called him over after school. A flicker of hope lit in his chest but it was quickly extinguished as they shoved their bags into his arm.

“Since you made us lose our carrier, it’s your job.” They laughed cruelly.

Minho stared at them in disbelief and then accepted them into his arms. It was what he deserved wasn’t it?

He had resigned himself to his fate when a hand grabbed his elbow and pulled him to a stop. It was Jisung.

He shook his head at Minho and then grabbed one backpack and slipped it on himself. When he grabbed another was when Minho realized what he was doing.

“Stop.” He said and promptly dropped all of them on the ground.

Jisung blinked at him in surprise as Minho pulled the other bags out of his arms and dumped them unceremoniously in the dirt.

“What are you doing?” One of his so-called friends exclaimed.

“Not carrying your bags.” Minho snapped back. “And neither will Jisung. Carry them yourself. I don’t want to be around you anymore.”

They stared at him in shock but Minho didn’t back down. He reached down and grabbed Jisung’s hand in his own.

“Let’s go Jisung.” He said with a cold glare directed at the other boys. 

Jisung let him pull him away from the group that were still standing stunned.

He let go of his hand after a few moments and spared him a quick glance.

“Sorry.” He mumbled.

“I forgive you.” Jisung replied after a moment.

They sat next to each other on the curb while waiting for Chan and Changbin to pick them up. It felt like they had returned to square one. Sitting in silence just happy not being alone.

Jisung fiddled with his backpack strap and kicked at the concrete with the toe of his sneaker. Minho wondered if Jisung really meant it when he said he forgave him. Minho had really put him through a lot.

There was a more pressing question on his mind that Minho wanted to ask.

“Jisung?” He asked hesitantly.

The younger boy tilted his head to look at him. Minho decided his puppy dog eyes weren’t all that bad.

“Would you be my friend?” He asked.

Something inside him fully expected Jisung to reject his question. He definitely didn’t deserve it.

“You don’t have to do anything for me.” Minho looked down at his shoes. “We could just… eat lunch together? Maybe. Only if you wanted.”

“Yes.” Jisung nodded his head. Minho looked at him in surprise. “I definitely want to be your friend.”

Minho smiled at him slowly and then reached over and slung his arm across his shoulders.

“Okay. We’re friends.”

School was much better now that Minho had a real friend to spend time with. Jisung still followed him around as much as possible at school, but Minho didn’t mind. Jisung was a good kid and he was good company. His shyness around Minho melted away as quickly as it had the first time and soon he was back to his bubbly, energetic personality.

But there was one thing looming over Minho that he couldn’t get out of his head. 

His father’s release was creeping closer and Minho couldn’t shake it from his thoughts. His father had been in jail for so long that he could barely remember his face clearly. Most of the memories were bad so he tried his best to keep them out of his mind.

Minho didn’t understand why his nightmares wouldn’t go away. He sat in therapy once a week and answered the questions and did what they said but nothing changed. Every couple of nights he woke up crying or screaming, desperate to get out of the darkness. 

Each time, Chan was there. He would pull Minho into his arms and let him cry out the fear. Minho never pushed him away. He couldn’t explain why he let Chan hold him. It was just the only comfort he allowed himself from anyone.

Chan was hard for him to read. He was always calm and mellow which had Minho waiting for him to snap. Even when he was angry at Minho, his anger seemed justified and he never took it out on him verbally or physically.

Minho knew deep down that Chan wanted to be close with him. It was obvious in the way he looked at him, the way he waited for Minho to let him, and the way he lit up every time Minho allowed him to come close.

It wasn’t that Minho didn’t want a relationship with Chan. He knew that it would either come crashing down around him the moment he let his walls down, or it would end. As far as he knew, it was coming to an end quickly with his father’s impending release.

For the first time since he had started living with Ara and Chan, now almost half a year ago, he got sick. He woke up in the morning feeling hot and constricted under his blankets. As he struggled to kick them off, he felt a wave of nausea wash over him.

At the time he was supposed to be leaving for school, he was kneeling on the bathroom floor trying to rid his stomach of whatever was causing him to be sick. 

“I’m leaving now.” Ara came into the bathroom and ran her hand over his head once. “If you need anything, tell Chan okay?”

Minho nodded, feeling absolutely miserable.

A few minutes later, Chan appeared in the doorway.

“I thought you had to go to work.” Minho commented.

He honestly wished Chan had gone to work since he hated being so vulnerable in front of others. Especially Chan.

“Took the day off so I could stay here with you.” Chan shrugged like it was nothing and came into the bathroom. “How are you feeling?”

“Cold.” Minho shivered. His muscles were starting to get tired from trembling so much.

“Can I check your temperature?” Chan stepped even closer to him.

Minho nodded but expected Chan to get a thermometer. Instead he just pressed the back of his hand to Minho’s forehead.

“You have a fever.” He concluded. “I can bring you a blanket but your body might get too hot.”

The next hour was torture. Minho threw up until he couldn’t anymore but still his body tried it’s best to bring something up. His abdominal muscles ached from cramping for so long.

The whole time he hung his head over the toilet, Chan crouched beside him, rubbing his hand up and down his back. He occasionally brushed Minho’s sweaty bangs back from his face.

“I-I want to be done.” Minho whined as he felt his stomach turn yet again.

“I’m sorry Min.” Chan switched to scratching his back with blunt fingertips in soothing circles. “You’ve got it all out so you should stop throwing up soon.”

Minho was so tired, he let his head fall forward, not caring if it rested on the toilet seat. Chan reached his hand forward and caught him before he could. Minho leaned his head against Chan’s palm, not minding the alternative.

“Do you wanna lay on the couch?” He asked.

“Too dizzy.” Minho replied. 

He instead slumped down onto the towels that had been laid out. He stayed curled on his side, not minding the cold floor seeping through.

Chan sat beside him with his back resting against the wall. He combed his fingers through Minho’s hair gently. At this point, Minho didn’t really care. The soft touch had his eyes fluttering closed automatically.

“Can you talk to me?” Minho whispered. He wanted a distraction.

“What should I talk about?” Chan replied.

“Anything.” Minho swallowed back the rising sick feeling. “Just talk to me please.”

“Okay.” Chan thought for a moment. “Do you want to hear about my mom?”

Minho hummed in affirmation, too exhausted to speak.

“My mom could bake just about anything.” Chan started off. “Cook too. Anything you wanted; she could do it. It might take a few tries but she could manage it in the end.”

“She was really soft-spoken.” Chan leaned his head back against the wall. “She always thought before she spoke. That’s probably why I made her cry so much. I always let my words run before my mouth.”

Minho was surprised to hear of a smart mouthed Chan.

“She made an effort with my real mom.” Chan voice got quieter as he remembered. “She always told me it was okay if I wanted to be with her. And she gave me every opportunity to have that. She was really rooting for me and my mom.”

He was quiet for a long moment and his hand stilled so it was just resting on Minho’s head.

“What happened with your real mom?” Minho asked.

He knew Chan had been a foster kid like him but he didn’t know the details.

“She finally decided she was tired of trying.” Chan resumed stroking his hand through Minho’s hair. “Of course… I wasn’t. But it didn’t matter. She voluntarily let me go.”

“Really?” Minho whispered. It was kind of hard to imagine Chan going through something like that. He seemed so… normal.

“My mom adopted me immediately. It was honestly more of her decision than my dad’s, though I know he loves me.” Chan pressed his hand to Minho’s forehead to test his temperature again before continuing. “It was the best thing that I never even knew I wanted.”

There was another stretch of silence before Minho asked another question.

“Why haven’t I met them?” He wondered out loud.

“My mom passed away three years ago.” Chan replied. “And my dad lives far away.”

“Oh.” Minho felt… bad for Chan. He had expected Chan to have a perfect family with a perfect journey to adoption. He hadn’t expected it to be so sad.

“Do you want to move to the couch now?” Chan asked.

Minho nodded and let Chan lift him and carry him to the living room. He tucked a blanket around Minho and got him a bowl just in case.

When he sat down next to Minho again, he reached over and lifted Chan’s hand back onto his head. He craved the comforting touch. It helped distract him.

“Why did you choose to foster me?” Minho asked, letting his eyes close again.

Chan waited before responding and Minho wondered if he had learned to think about his words like his foster mom had done.

“If you asked why I chose to foster in general I would say Ara. She’s the one who first had the idea.” Chan explained. “She convinced me by using my own experience. If I could give that to another child then I would be happy.”

“But the reason I stuck with you even after the placement was… you’re just like me.” Chan said softly.

Minho opened his eyes and shifted so he could look at him.

“What do you mean?” He asked.

“Inside I think you’re a little afraid and maybe a little lonely.” Chan answered honestly. “I kept it all bottled up inside because I was afraid that if I wasn’t strong, or independent, then I would get left behind again.”

He smiled down at Minho and brushed his thumb over his forehead.

“You don’t have to be brave all the time for me. You can be scared, or anxious, or  
confused, or any of those scary emotions around me.” Minho clung to his words. “I’m your parent because I chose to be, not because you earned me.”

It was a foreign concept to Minho, that someone would choose to care for him. He had learned first through Ara and then Jisung and now Chan, that people did care for him, regardless of if he deserved it or not.

“You can’t ever lose my love for you because you didn’t have to earn it.” Chan told him. “It will always exist regardless.”

Minho didn’t say anything. He didn’t know what to say. It was strange in some ways and familiar in others. He could just be himself around Chan. It was a beautiful thing.

That night, he fell asleep on the couch, Chan’s words treasured safely in his heart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! I’m sorry for all the drama! It had to be done! Be looking forward to some really happy friendship moments between Minho and Jisung later on because this chapter was so angsty! And yes, this was finally a break through moment for Minho with Chan. I’m honestly nervous already if the ending will be satisfactory for everyone. I have to warn you, a lot happens before the end! Now that all characters have been developed, we will zoom through more interactions! Also I hope Chan’s backstory touched your heart. I think it’s very sweet! >u<


	5. Changbin

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! At this point in the story we are halfway through! I am wrapping up the last three chapters at the moment and am excited to share them! This chapter is important because it is the one where Changbin begins to experience a shift from being Jisung’s foster parent to wanting to adopt him permanently. This one is definitely much happier and fluffier than the past few! Enjoy!  
>  TW: Mentions of unhealthy relationships

Changbin was reminded yet again of just how much Jisung craved a paternal figure when they went on Saturday to a seminar type festival that he had been invited to speak at. It was for foster parents of all different backgrounds, whether they were old, new, or perspective.

Jisung had been bundled along even though it probably wasn’t the most fun event they could be at on the weekend.

It was in a large auditorium with booths set up with everything under the sun that related to foster parenting, as well as guest speakers that spoke in the rooms that had also been rented out. Changbin was spending half the day at a booth that offered therapy options in the area.

He was set to be working the booth with another worker who had more experience with therapy. Changbin knew the importance of therapy when it came to trauma so he was glad to be able to promote for the day.

Jisung was sitting with his head bowed over a word search book intently. Changbin had been surprised when he had asked to buy it when they went shopping but Jisung was genuinely intrigued by it. At least it kept him busy.

“Seo Changbin?”

A voice called his attention.

“Hi!” A woman dressed in semi-formal attire extended her hand to him across the booth. “I’m Misun, your resident psychologist for today.”

“Hello!” Changbin shook her hand and bowed his head. She was the one slotted to work the booth with him.

“Sorry I’m a bit late.” She apologized as she joined him behind the booth. “I underestimated traffic.”

“It’s no problem!” Changbin smiled. “I hope you don’t mind I brought an addition.”

She glanced at Jisung and smiled.

“The more the better right?” She shrugged and laughed.

They didn’t really talk much for the first hour as a wave of people started to filter through.

She seemed very simple but in the best way. The way that made you feel as if you knew the person inside and out after just one conversation. And she was very polite. Changbin observed her interactions with the group as the day progressed. 

She engaged easily with everyone else but also sat quietly with a slight smile on her face, content to let the others speak. Changbin was impressed. He also snuck a glance at her beautifully shaped eyes and delicate features when she was speaking.

He hadn’t expected his partner to be so pretty. She was professional and held herself confidently which made her seem ten times more attractive.

During a lull, Changbin decided it was time for lunch.

“Can I get you something from one of the stalls?” Changbin asked Misun. The way his time worked made it so he had a short break during this time.

“Oh, that would be great actually.” She smiled. “Anything is fine really!”

She reached for her wallet and pulled it open.

“It’s on me.” Changbin held out his hand. 

“Are you sure?” She extended some bills towards him. “It’s not that much.”

“Which is why I don’t mind paying.” Changbin assured her. “Really, don’t worry about it!”

“Thank you.” She bowed her head in thanks and then tucked her hair back behind her ear, suddenly seeming shy.

“Do you want to come with me?” Changbin asked Jisung.

He set aside his book and followed Changbin to one of the food stalls they had set up just outside of the auditorium.

“You can choose what we eat.” Changbin gestured to the options.

Jisung was very cute when faced with decision making Changbin had learned. He would scrunch up his nose and press his lips together in a serious look. He was very expressive no matter what the emotion was.

He chose a hotdog place in the end. Changbin got Misun a hot sandwich from the stall next to it since he thought she would prefer it over a greasy hotdog.

Jisung accepted the hotdog from Changbin with wide eyes. It was one of the large ones held on a stick. Changbin laughed under his breath at his expression as they started walking back. Jisung was focused on his treat so much, he didn’t see the curb.

The toe of his sneaker caught on the concrete and Changbin didn’t even have time to reach for him as he stumbled forward.

“Oops!” Changbin’s heart skipped a beat but it wasn’t a bad fall, just a little stumble that sent him to his hands and knees.

Jisung stood up immediately, his hotdog now on the ground. He looked at it for a moment and then picked it up. 

“Are you okay?” Changbin checked.

Jisung nodded and avoided his eyes, shy all of a sudden again. Changbin was just moving to reach out for his hotdog to toss in the trash when Jisung moved it to his mouth.

“No!” Changbin jerked his hand out and caught him before he could stick it back in his mouth. Jisung’s eyes were wide and startled at the sudden movement. He blinked up at Changbin in confusion.

“It’s dirty.” Changbin took it from him, kind of shocked that he would eat it even after it dropped on the ground.

He walked a few feet to the nearest trash can and tossed it in without any disappointment in his heart. It was just a hotdog. But it was obviously more to Jisung because when Changbin turned back he had his shoulders hunched and his head down.

“We’ll get another one.” Changbin told him.

To him it didn’t seem like a big deal. He didn’t mind going back to the stall one bit.

“I’m sorry.” Jisung whispered and brought his hand up to brush against his cheek.

“Hey…” Changbin crouched in front of him to see his face.

Jisung rubbed the back of his hand over his eyes, his lip trembling. Changbin was at a loss because he was crying and he didn’t know why. Could it be that he didn’t believe Changbin would get him another one? Was that why he had tried to eat it even though it was dirty?

“I’ll get you another one.” Changbin reassured him. “It’s okay.”

“I-I’m sorry I dropped it.” Jisung sniffled and glanced at Changbin shyly.

“It was an accident.” Changbin smiled. “It’s not a big deal.”

Jisung stared at him like he didn’t trust him. Changbin supposed he didn’t have much of a reason to based off of his past experiences.

“We’ll go get a new one, okay?” Changbin stood up and went so far as to offer his hand to the anxious boy.

Moments like these reminded Changbin of just how much kids can internalize. The idea that if they make a mistake then they bear the consequences felt awfully harsh for an eleven-year-old. It sparked a hint of anger in Changbin’s chest that Jisung had been taught this. The fact that he cried showed he expected punishment.

Changbin would never punish for an accident and he wanted Jisung to know that. Jisung was quiet, wiping away any remaining tears with his sleeve. When they got the new hotdog, Changbin led Jisung aside to the grass.

Yet again, he crouched in front of him and made eye contact to convey that he was serious.

“If you make a mistake, it’s okay to be disappointed.” Changbin told Jisung. “But it was just a mistake. And I won’t be angry over it.”

Jisung stared back at him, his eyes scanning Changbin’s face to gauge his sincerity.

“No matter what happened, you don’t need to feel embarrassed or worried towards me.” Changbin extended the hotdog to him. “You deserve this regardless of what happened.”

Jisung took it slowly and Changbin could practically hear his brain struggling to comprehend. He wanted to let the boy know that the level of care given to him wasn’t dependent on his actions. 

A parent does what’s best for their child even if they don’t “deserve” it. He wanted Jisung to feel safe, even in the little ways. Changbin wouldn’t deny him food or allow him to eat something dirty just because he had made a mistake.

“You can eat it.” Changbin encouraged softly. “It’s yours.”

Jisung blinked up at him with slightly conflicted eyes for a moment before slowly taking a bite. Changbin smiled as gently as he could, hoping Jisung would be able to store the experience as a positive mindset.

They walked back in silence for a few moments, Changbin’s heart still a little uneasy.

Then warm fingers brushed against his hesitantly before Jisung’s smaller hand slipped into his larger one.

Changbin glanced down at him but Jisung avoided eye contact, holding his hotdog tightly in one hand. Changbin wrapped his fingers back around Jisung’s slight fingers securely. He wouldn’t deny him the simple gesture either. It obviously made Jisung feel safe and it exhibited his trust in Changbin.

Misun shot Changbin a questioning look when they returned and she noticed Jisung’s red nose and teary eyes.

“He’s just fine.” Changbin said under his breath to her as he handed her the sandwich he had bought. 

“So you’re a psychologist?” Changbin asked as they sat together during a break.

“I am. My passion is the psychology of family relationships.” She answered. “Which explains why I’m here.”

Changbin smiled and nodded.

“I’m actually a writer as well. I write extensively about psychology.” She continued. “I strongly believe in research-based writing so most of the research I have done has been on the very basic definition of a ‘family’. Though I strongly believe that there is more than one way to define the word and many ways to delve into the mental and psychological environment of a family.”

“I’m sorry.” She blushed slightly and stopped herself. “I don’t mean to bore you.”

“No not at all!” Changbin quickly denied. “I’m very interested!”

“Well, that’s why I’m here.” She shrugged with a smile. “I don’t know much about the foster care system, but I’m invested in learning and hopefully sharing my knowledge with others in my writing.”

“That’s truly admirable.” Changbin complimented her genuinely.

“What about you?” She turned it back upon him. “What do you do for a living?”

“I’m actually a caseworker so I’m quite familiar with the system.” Changbin started to explain. “Which is helpful for my real full-time job which is being a dad and foster parent.”

“Oh so your kids are foster kids?” She asked and gestured to Jisung behind them.

“This one is mine through foster care at the moment.” He patted Jisung’s head who hadn’t been paying attention at all. Misun gave him a bright smile which he returned shyly before returning to what he was doing.

“That’s really awesome!” She replied. “I hate to be too nosy, but are you a single parent?”

“I am.” Changbin replied. He expected her to be surprised or respond awkwardly but she wasn’t phased in the slightest.

“Even more admirable.” She gave him a thumbs up and he couldn’t help the odd swooping in his chest at the cute gesture.

They finished out the day together in comfortable companionship, referring people to each other as needed with relevant questions.

Changbin could tell Jisung was ready to go at the end with how fidgety he was. Once he had him gather his things, he turned to Misun.

“It was really nice meeting you.” He said and felt a bit sad that their time was over.

“You as well!” She bowed her head. “Actually! I hope it’s not too forward of me to ask this but… I was wondering if you would share some of your experiences with me. As someone who fits into the category of having a non-traditional family.”

She quickly waved her hands in front of her after she was finished.

“Of course I know it’s a lot to ask! I am so sorry if I come off as rude!” She blushed again. “You just have a lovely family from what I can tell and I would love to include diverse experiences in my writing.”

“No need to apologize!” Changbin reassured her. “I would be more than happy to share my thoughts and experiences with you. Here…”

He pulled his phone out of his pocket and handed it to her to type in her number.

“Just contact me and I will work something in with my schedule.” He said.

“Thank you so much!” Misun bowed her head in thanks again and accepted his phone. Her hands shook a little as she typed in her number but Changbin didn’t comment.

“Maybe we could meet in person and I could pay you back for the sandwich.” She smiled.

“Okay, sounds like a deal.” Changbin smiled back as she handed him his phone after sending herself a message. “I hope to hear from you soon.”

“You will!” She assured him as they left.

There was something about Misun’s personality that had Changbin intrigued. He wanted to get to know her as much as she wanted to get to know him.

She messaged him the next day while Changbin was relaxing with Jisung. It was the weekend so Jisung didn’t have school and he was off work so they were in the living room trying to decide what to do.

“Did you know that Minho is double jointed?” Jisung asked Changbin as he lay half snuggled against his side. He was bending Changbin’s wrist back and forth as well as his fingers.

“Oi! I am not!” Changbin laughed as he bent his finger a little too far back.

Jisung giggled and curled Changbin’s hand into a fist to bump with his own.

“Your hair is getting long.” Changbin ran his fingers through his bangs which Jisung was almost constantly brushing aside. “You need a haircut.”

“Will you cut my hair?” Jisung leaned his head back to look up at Changbin.

“I have to ask your dad first.” Changbin responded. “And then we would go to a professional place because I don’t trust myself!”

Jisung shifted onto his knees on the couch and reached up to play with Changbin’s hair. He tried to twirl it into shapes but it was too soft and fell flat.

“You need water to make it stay.” Changbin laughed at the way his lip pouted out in frustration. 

Unfortunately that gave Jisung a great idea and he ran to get the spray bottle that Changbin had for the plants on the windowsill. 

Changbin was going to say something about it but was distracted by his phone ringing. To his surprise it was Misun. He answered immediately.

“Hello?”

“Hi! This is Misun!” She replied. “I hope I didn’t catch you when you were busy?”

“No. Now is just fine.” He replied but he was eyeing Jisung who had returned with the spray bottle. “What’s up?”

“I was wondering if you were free this Monday to grab coffee with me.” She said. “I have some time in the evening.”

“Monday evening is fine.” Changbin answered as Jisung sprayed his hair and started trying to make it stick up. “Is six o’ clock a good time for you?”

“Yes! It’s perfect!” She sounded happy. “I’m free the rest of the evening so we can take all the time we need.”

“Okay sounds like a plan. Ouch! Don’t pull my hair.” Changbin reached up to untangle Jisung’s fingers from his messy hair.

“Sounds like you’re on dad duty.” Misun laughed.

“Always.” Changbin smiled. “Is there anything I should prepare for when we meet?”

“Just bring yourself!” She replied. “I’ll have questions to ask you but they won’t be hard so don’t worry about it. And you don’t have to answer anything you don’t want.”

“Alright! I’ll see you then. Just text me the address.” Changbin winced as Jisung’s fingers pulled a little too hard again.

“Okay. See you later!” Misun ended the call.

“Your hair is too floppy!” Jisung complained.

“It’s not short enough and doesn’t have enough product to stay in place.” Changbin laughed. Jisung suddenly rubbed his hands all over, making it a total mess.

“Ya!” Jisung turned and attacked him with tickles, making him shriek.

Later that night, Jisung came looking for him as he brushed his teeth.

“Woah, let’s keep brushing teeth in the bathroom.” Changbin guided him back into the bathroom before he spilled any toothpaste on the floor.

Once he was done, Jisung wiped his mouth and smiled wide at Changbin for him to inspect.

“All clean!” Changbin gave him thumbs up.

“Can you do goodnight kiss for me tonight?” Jisung asked while hopping off his stool.

“Can I…” Changbin was a little surprised but he recovered quickly. “Yeah, of course.”

Once Jisung was cuddled up in his blankets and had his plushie with him, Changbin came and sat down on the edge of his bed.

“I have a question.” Jisung stated.

“Okay, what is it?” Changbin smiled down at him.

“Do you love me?”

The simple question came at Changbin out of nowhere. He didn’t know what to say since it was so sudden and unexpected. Foster parents could tell their kids that they loved them, but the almost random question had stunned Changbin.

“Why do you ask?” Changbin finally asked in return.

“At school we were talking about it and the teacher had us write down someone who loved us.” Jisung shifted to be more comfortable and looked up at Changbin innocently.

“What did you write?” Changbin asked directly.

“I didn’t write anything.” Jisung shrugged. “I didn’t know the right answer.”

Changbin’s heart may have broken a little hearing Jisung talk about it without seeming bothered at all. He tried not to show his sadness on his face as he smiled back at Jisung. 

“I love you sweetheart.” He told him. “And Minho, and Chan, and Grandma and grandpa.”

He was hesitant to say Minho after everything that Jisung had been through in the last month, but now he was confident they were friends.

As a foster parent, Changbin didn’t tell his child that he loved them the minute they arrived, even if it would comfort them in the moment. Love and affection took time and the child should be able to trust that the emotion was genuine since it had been proven by the development of the relationship.

Jisung was asking around the three-month mark. It felt like a long time and a short time all at once. But Changbin was confident in his answer. He really did love Jisung.

“But not my dad?” Jisung fiddled with the ear of his puppy plushie.

Changbin hesitated. Not because he didn’t think Jisung’s father loved him, but because he almost couldn’t believe Jisung had to question.

“Your dad loves you.” He reached out to bump his knuckle against Jisung’s chin to make him smile. “Lots of people love you. There’s no right answer. You have lots of options.”

“I didn’t know for sure.” Jisung rubbed his eyes with his hands sleepily and Changbin felt another rush of affection for him.

Was the concept of love so foreign to him that he didn’t know who loved him? Changbin felt the overwhelming need and desire to show Jisung that he was loved and people did care for him. Changbin had struggled over the past month as he grew more attached to Jisung.

He knew that the visits with his father had been generally good recently. The chances of Jisung being adopted by Changbin were slim to none. It made him worried for the future. Changbin knew he was hopelessly attached to Jisung and it would hurt when he had to leave. But he worried more for Jisung.

If he was attached to Changbin, it would be hard to return to his father, and he knew it would create division. If not between Jisung and his father, then internally.

But how could he deny Jisung of simple things that a child needed? A kiss goodnight. Asking about his day. A comforting hug or a word of encouragement. Changbin couldn’t withhold them for the sake of keeping their relationship on a basic level. He didn’t believe it was right.

“I love you.” Changbin said as he leaned forward to press a kiss to Jisung’s forehead. “You don’t have to wonder.”

Changbin sat next to Jisung as he fell asleep that night. He felt a deep sadness in his heart. He wanted to keep Jisung in the safe bubble he had created but that wasn’t his choice to make.

Changbin started meeting with Misun fairly regularly since the first time. His days fell into a comfortable rhythm of work, Jisung, and when he had time, spending time with Misun.

“Hey there. That’s stylish.” Misun pointed at the coffee stain at the bottom of his shirt.

“Thanks, it’s the work of Jisung.” Changbin rolled his eyes but smiled and gave her a hug. “I didn’t have time to change.”

“Should we be seated?” Changbin looked around for a server. 

They had gone to a nicer restaurant than usual per Changbin’s request. It wasn’t exactly a date but Changbin wanted to treat her to something.

“You look beautiful today.” Changbin said sincerely.

She had on a summer dress and a black cardigan. Her hair was loose and falling down her back in long waves. She looked surprised but smiled brightly.

“Thank you! You also look handsome, even with the stain.” She giggled and Changbin tried to brush away the light feeling in his chest.

“What’s the first question today?” he asked after they had ordered.

“Um, it’s a bit more personal to you…” She tucked her hair behind her ears and looked away shyly.

“Okay.” Changbin nodded. So far, she hadn’t asked any questions that he didn’t want to answer.

“I’m curious… why you don’t have a partner.” She finally said.

“Is this a personal question or objective for your research?” Changbin asked a bit teasingly.

“I was just wondering since usually foster homes have two parents.” She was blushing bright pink answering him. “And many people say it’s harder not having another support.”

“You’re right in both regards.” Changbin relented. “Most foster homes do have two parents and sometimes it feels particularly hard. My goal was always to offer my home to kids that were in need, whether or not I was married or engaged or in a relationship or any of that.”

Changbin contemplated for a moment how to phrase it.

“I know many people judge me for not being married before bringing in my first kid. I know first-hand how hard single parenting is and I wouldn’t recommend anyone going for it without serious thought.” He continued. “I only really decided it was a good fit for me after two years of me being a caseworker and learning the system.”

“That makes sense.” Misun nodded.

“At the time I received Jisung’s placement, I wasn’t in a relationship with anyone.” Changbin explained. “I was open to it and am still open, but my kids come first.”

“That’s really good.” She smiled gently. “How is it going with Jisung by the way?”

It was honestly so endearing to Changbin that Misun was invested in his Jisung. He had her over for dinner once and Jisung had loved her. She connected with him so well and had genuine care for him.

“The visits are going well.” Changbin sighed a little. “I know I should be happy but… every day he becomes more attached and it’s harder to get him to go to the visits. I want to fight for him, to adopt him, but the odds are overwhelming not in my favor.”

Misun made a sad face.

“But he’s been growing so much.” Changbin smiled proudly. “It’s fascinating how a boy that shy can talk so much! He’s really become more confident.”

“I’m so glad to hear it!” Misun pressed her hands together in excitement.

The food arrived then and they ate and talked comfortably. They had been talking about themselves more often and getting to know each other more.

Changbin paid the bill and joined her outside the restaurant.

“Thanks for paying.” She said.

“It’s my pleasure.” He nodded. “Consider it a celebration of our tenth meeting.”

“Has it been that many already?” She gasped.

“Yep.” Changbin shoved his hands in his pockets. “Where’s your car? I’ll walk you to it.”

“It’s in the shop. I took a taxi here.” She explained.

“Then I’ll drive you home.” Changbin offered.

“If you don’t mind.” Misun smiled down at her feet and followed him to his car.

When they arrived at her apartment complex they sat in the car for a moment.

“You asked me earlier about dating.” Changbin broke the silence. She turned her head to look at him.

“Would you… consider tonight a date?” He asked, his heart rabbiting nervously in his chest. 

“I… I would. If you want.” She replied.

“It’s your decision.” Changbin looked at her. “If you would consider… dating me.”

She smiled and dropped her head, her hair falling partially in her face so she had to brush it back.

“Yes. I mean, I would like to date you.” She replied with a slight nervous tremor in her voice. “It’s something I would like very much.”

“Okay.” Changbin nodded, cringing internally if he sounded lame. “But I want to take you on a real first date since tonight wasn’t planned.”

“Deal.” She smiled at him.

It was nerve wracking for Changbin to ask her and he almost backed out, but he had done it. He was glad that she had brought up dating and relationships, because he had been able to explain where he stood in regards to Jisung well.

“Call me, okay?” Misun said as she opened the car door and grabbed her wallet.

“I will.” Changbin tried to contain his wide smile.

“Oh, and…” She stuck her head back in the car and motioned him forward.

When he leaned over, she pressed a quick kiss against his cheek. Her lips were soft against his skin and made his heart stutter.

She pulled back and waved goodbye hastily before closing the door and heading to her apartment.

Changbin was stunned for a moment and then he smiled again and pressed his hand to his chest. Misun was dating him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! I really enjoyed writing this chapter! Misun’s character is one I really loved developing! I hope you like her as much as Changbin does! >u<  
> Very important note!! Jisung does have a caseworker even though I haven’t included them in the story. I decided that relationship fit a bit more into the legal side that I kept vague for the sake of the plot of the story! But yes, Jisung does have a separate caseworker besides his father and Changbin.  
> In regards to haircuts, the foster parent needs to ask permission from the biological parent or guardian because it is considered altering the child’s appearance. Also, to be clear, foster parents can tell their child that they love them but it is a complicated thing because many times it feels too rushed or not genuine. Most importantly, parents should show through their actions that they love their child and will support them.


	6. Jisung

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! This chapter is a much fluffier chapter with lots of plot connection. Fair warning for chapters 7 through 10: They will be the 3 chapter conclusion of this story and will pack a hefty punch of plot and drama! So please take this chapter as a breather before we reach the end! Thank you for all your support! I would be so honored if you gave me some feedback as we wrap up! I have a very important question that I ask in the ending notes! Please take a moment if you have time to help me out! Hope you all have a wonderful day!  
> TW: Unhealthy relationships

Jisung had only one day that he dreaded over any other day. He had dreaded it since he saw it on the schedule for his class. It was project day. The day he had to get up in front of the class and share for four minutes about the research he had done.

Maybe it would have been easier if it was for his music class or his history class, but it was for his science class. Science class was his least favorite class and the one he struggled with the most.

“It’s okay. Take a second to remember and try again.” Changbin encouraged him.

Jisung was standing in front of Changbin in the living room, trying to remember his speech. It didn’t have to be perfectly memorized but his teacher had said they needed to have the important points down.

“The cell…” Changbin prompted from the notecard they had written.

“The cell is…” Jisung fidgeted in place and then let out a noise of frustration.

“I can’t remember any of it!” He cried as he dramatically sunk to his knees and buried his face against the cushions of the couch.

“You’re stressing yourself out too much.” Changbin replied. “I know you know it because we worked on this speech for hours last week.”

“I don’t know it.” Jisung replied but his voice was muffled by the way his face was pressed into the cushions.

“Come over and read it again.” Changbin patted beside him but Jisung stubbornly stayed where he was.

“Jisung, your speech is tomorrow. We can go over it a few more times before dinner.” Jisung knew Changbin was trying to be positive but it felt hopeless.

He pushed himself up anyways and flopped down next to Changbin to read the card again.

“Surprise!”

They were interrupted by the door opening and Chan flinging his arms wide with a big smile on his face. Minho was half hidden behind him and Jisung popped up off of the couch to greet them.

“Seriously.” Changbin groaned and slumped back against the couch, hand covering his eyes.

“I heard your case just ended and… they were having a buy one get one free deal on cheesecake. Which is obviously too good to pass up!” Jisung agreed with Chan’s statement. “So I brought you free cheesecake!”

He extended it like a trophy and Changbin couldn’t help but smile at his contagious excitement.

“You had to come right in the middle of me trying to make progress.” Changbin smiled at Chan but raised his eyebrow pointedly.

Jisung decided it was time to escape so he grabbed Minho’s hand and tried to pull him out of the room, preferably upstairs.

“I want to hear this speech.” Chan gasped in surprise from behind Jisung after looking at his notecard. “We now have cheesecake to celebrate your performance.”

Minho stopped and Jisung let out a whine of disappointment while trying to pull him away.

“Come back here Jisung.” Changbin’s tone was sterner than usual and had him coming back into the living room with his head down like a lost puppy.

Chan chuckled and rumpled his hair on the way to store the cheesecake in the fridge.

“It’s all in your head silly.” Changbin tapped his forehead and handed him his card. “Try reading off of the card for us first.”

Jisung dragged his feet to stand in front of them as Chan and Minho sat beside Chan.

“Um…” Jisung felt so nervous with everyone’s eyes on him. He read from the card slower than usual, stumbling over a few hard terms, but managing to get through it.

“That was a very good speech!” Chan praised him after clapping.

Jisung felt himself blush and he avoided eye contact.

“Now without the card.” Changbin smiled and extended his hand.

Jisung felt overwhelmed by everyone’s eyes on him. It was like it all disappeared from his brain in a heartbeat and made his hands shake and his heart pound.

“I don’t want to.” He said quietly.

His eyes flickered to Changbin’s since he was worried about showing any signs of defiance.

“Aw please Ji? I really want to hear it again!” Chan tried to persuade him.

Jisung handed the card back to Changbin and then sunk down to sit on the floor and leaned against the couch. He pressed his face against Changbin’s knee to hide his face. He knew it was silly to be nervous and childish to hide but he couldn’t help it.

“Okay.” Changbin sighed and reached down to pat his back.

“I think he’s just embarrassed.” He said to Chan quietly. Jisung caught it anyways and agreed. It was embarrassing and he wanted it to be over fast.

He didn’t want to think about when he would actually have to do it in front of his class the next day. Instead he immersed himself in spending time with everyone eating cheesecake.

“I think cheesecake is my favorite food.” Jisung told Minho when they went to his room.

“It can’t be your favorite food because it’s a dessert.” Minho corrected before flopping onto his bed.

“Okay… favorite dessert.” Jisung didn’t understand the logic. He rescued his puppy from under Minho.

“You still sleep with plushies?” Minho smirked.

“Yeah…” Jisung replied.

“I guess he’s kinda cute.” Minho took the puppy from Jisung’s arms and inspected it. “But he’s missing an ear.”

“It fell off a while ago. It’s somewhere at my dad’s house.” Jisung explained.

“My mo- I mean, Ara could sew it back on.” Minho patted the plushies head.

“I don’t think I can get his ear.” Jisung shrugged. “I don’t think I’ll ever go back to my old house.”

“Is Changbin going to adopt you?” Minho sat up in interest.

“He didn’t say he would…” Jisung played with the edge of his blanket shyly. “I hope he does though. I like it here. Better than… with my dad.”

“Mm… me too.” Minho nodded and they sat for a minute in comfortable agreement.

“Are Chan and Ara going to adopt you?” Jisung asked.

“Probably not…” Minho’s face grew cold and stoic like it sometimes did. “My dad gets out of jail in a little while. I probably have to go back.”

“Oh…” Jisung didn’t know what to say. Then he had a thought.

“You’ll still be friends with me even if you have to go back, right?” He asked nervously. “You’re my best friend.”

“I don’t think I can see you much if I stay with my dad.” Minho said quietly.

Jisung felt his heart sink. He didn’t want Minho to go away. Minho took in his expression and offered him an encouraging smile.

“We’ll always be friends Jisung, even if I don’t get to see you very much.” He promised. “I don’t think I will change schools so we’ll still see each other almost every day.”

“Okay.” Jisung nodded. That sounded much better but he still didn’t want Minho to have to leave. He thought Chan and Ara would be very sad.

It was hard to sleep that night since he was thinking about Minho. If he had to go back to his dad, they wouldn’t get to spend much time together. When they were at school, they only had the time at lunch since they were in different classes.

He also stressed over whether or not Changbin would adopt him. He had been thinking about it more and more often even though it made him feel bad. If his dad knew what he was thinking, he would be angry.

He tossed and turned worrying about Minho and Changbin for hours until he gave up on trying to sleep.

He looked at the clock and saw it read a bit past two in the morning. The numbers almost scared him since he had never had such a hard time sleeping before. He felt anxious and lonely. It was all because of the dumb presentation.

He wanted to be comforted by Changbin. It was kind of an odd thought for him since he didn’t usually want to be comforted by his real dad. But then again, he wasn’t very good at it.

He padded down the hallway in his socks with his blanket around his shoulders until he reached Changbin’s door. Co-sleeping wasn’t allowed so Jisung couldn’t sneak in, and the door was closed so Changbin might be angry if he woke him up just so he could send Jisung back to bed.

He ended up sinking down onto the floor, somehow feeling comforted by just being close to Changbin. His own room felt too lonely and dark to sleep in. He curled up under his blanket and surprisingly fell asleep quickly.

In the morning, he was woken by Changbin lifting him up and carrying him to the couch. He grumbled tiredly and rubbed his nose against Changbin’s shoulder as he sat down.

“Why were you sleeping on the floor?” Changbin scolded him and bumped his knuckle against his nose.

Jisung sighed sleepily and tucked his hands in between his stomach and Changbin’s to warm them up.

“It’s too cold to sleep on the floor.” Changbin said. “If you needed something, you could’ve woken me up.”

“I didn’t know.” Jisung replied. “I didn’t want to bother you.”

“You don’t bother me sweetheart.” Changbin’s voice was still deep and rough from sleep. “Next time just wake me up, okay?”

“Okay.” Jisung nodded and snuggled closer to him.

Changbin never pushed Jisung away, or snapped at him for being affectionate. He seemed to recognize that Jisung had never had that kind of attention. Jisung was still shy most of the time but he had become more confident and self-assured. 

Even though Changbin let him be affectionate, he still had strict rules that he had to follow. One was that they had to go to school.

Jisung didn’t want to go to school that morning. He held the notecard that his presentation was written on tightly in his hands as they drove to school. He had tried to pull his best pouty face for Changbin to try get him to relent and let him skip his dreaded science class, but Changbin stood firm.

He sent Jisung off to his fate with a pat on the back and the assurance that he would be fine. Jisung didn’t feel fine. The day seemed to stretch on forever before, finally, he had his class.

He tapped his foot nervously against the bar under his seat since his feet barely touched the floor. The first few presentations had gone by fast and Jisung could read on the board that he was next. 

His heart was beating too fast again and his hands bent his notecard without realizing it.

“Jisung. You’re up now.” His teacher said.

He felt shaky and weak walking to the front of the class and turning to face them.

“Start when you’re ready.” He teacher prompted gently.

Jisung took a deep breath and tried to remember what he had said to Changbin the night before. He pictured the memory in his head and began to recite his speech.

It felt like it was over in just moments even though he knew he had said the whole thing. The class clapped in appreciation and he got to sit down again.

A smile crept onto his face when he realized he had done it. All the practicing had paid off because he had successfully given his presentation.

As soon as he saw Changbin’s car pull into a parking spot, he ran across the pavement to meet him.

“I did it!” He announced as he collided with Changbin in excitement.

“I knew you could do it!” Changbin smiled brightly and rumpled his hair.

“I got this!” Jisung held up the sheet of paper that his teacher had given him after class.

Changbin took it from him and examined it.

“What does it say?” Jisung tugged on his arm to bring the paper down to his eye level again. He had tried to read it earlier but it was a lot of categories and numbers. He wasn’t sure how they related.

“Let’s see… your final score is ninety-six out of one hundred.” Changbin summarized. “That’s so good Jisung! You got an A plus!”

Jisung bounced in place and grabbed the paper to look at it again.

“You worked hard.” Changbin said. “Should we do something to celebrate?”

“What?” He asked.

“Hm… do you want to go to a movie?” Changbin asked.

“Go where?” Jisung was confused. They had movies at home.

“To a movie theater!” Changbin replied.

“Oh…” Jisung’s eyes widened. “I’ve never been to one.”

Jisung wasn’t really sure why he hadn’t been to a movie theater before. If he watched a movie it was usually one that was playing on the TV and it had commercials.

“I wanna go!” He raised his hand in the air to show his enthusiasm.

“Alright!” Changbin laughed. “I’ll see what’s playing.”

Jisung felt like he was vibrating with excitement. Not only had he done a good job and was getting a reward, he was getting to watch a movie in the theater! It was new and exciting.

He was practically climbing on top of Changbin to see his phone as he scrolled through the movies showing.

“Woah! What about that one?” He pointed to one with a colorful image.

“I can’t see bud!” Changbin gently moved him to the side so he could see.

“I’ll look at the reviews.” Changbin searched up some reviews and then looked at the screenplay. He didn’t let Jisung look at it because he didn’t want to spoil the movie for him but wanted to make sure it was all okay.

“I’m so excited!” Jisung jumped on Changbin as he stood, shaking his arm a little bit. Changbin shared his enthusiasm just on a smaller scale.

He wanted to ask a million questions on the car ride there but he stuck to looking out the car window and kicking his legs at a fast pace.

“Don’t kick my seat.” Changbin told him.

“Are we there yet?” Jisung asked.

“Just a few more minutes.” Changbin reported from the GPS system.

Jisung had seen movie theaters and his friends had talked about them but he had never actually been inside one. They were a mystery to him.

He was fascinated with everything. There was a screen which showed all the movies and times and a nice person who gave them tickets. Changbin let him reach up and grab his ticket through the glass slot. 

He was a little surprised when someone inside the theater ripped it in half and handed him half of it back.

“That part is for you to keep.” Changbin explained to him as he stared down at it. “It’s like a keepsake.”

Jisung nodded. He would keep it inside his special box that Changbin had given him to keep his important things in.

Jisung wanted popcorn so Changbin bought some and a drink.

“It’s so big!” Jisung wasn’t sure what was more impressive, the size of the popcorn or the size of the whole theater. There was a hallway of doors that had movies playing in each one.

“We’re in here.” Changbin guided him to one door.

It was so big inside with so many seats. Jisung stood looking at the room not sure where to go. Luckily Changbin took the lead and they settled into three seats in the middle.

When the screen started playing the movie, Jisung was startled. It started off with a loud noise and the sound seemed to come from all around him. 

“Let me know if it’s too loud.” Changbin leaned over and whispered in his ear.

Jisung just nodded, too enthralled with the massive screen displaying the movie in vibrant colors. It was amazing.

Jisung spent almost the entire movie not moving an inch from his seat. He sat staring at the screen with wide eyes and his lips parted just slightly in awe. He could feel Changbin glancing at him from time to time but he couldn’t tear his eyes away from the screen.

Even when he ate popcorn, many pieces missed his mouth and disappeared onto the floor because he was so immersed in the movie.

When the movie was over, Jisung held Changbin’s hand to walk out of the dark theater. He was silent as they walked all the way to the parking lot.

“It was that good?” Changbin asked with a grin as he handed him a cleansing wipe to clean away the popcorn dust from his fingers.

Jisung nodded his head solemnly, his mind still replaying the experience from a few moments ago.

“Your eyes are still wide open.” Changbin laughed and wiped at a smudge on his cheek with his thumb.

“Can we go again?” Jisung looked at him hopefully.

“Yeah, we can go another time.” Changbin nodded.

“Tomorrow?” Jisung wanted to go back as soon as possible.

“I don’t think we can tomorrow.” Changbin chuckled and opened the car door. “Maybe next week though.”

Misun came over for dinner that night and Jisung told her all about it. She listened to his story and asked him questions which made Jisung even more engaged in telling the story.

He liked Misun. She was nice and she always asked Changbin and Jisung how their day was, or how school was. When she was over, Changbin never stopped smiling. 

Jisung liked when Changbin smiled. Sometimes Changbin got a concentrated look on his face that resembled a frown. He usually got it when he was doing something without Jisung or with him, or when he was on the phone.

He had that look on the weekend while he was looking over paperwork at the kitchen table. He called them his files and Jisung was not allowed to touch them. Changbin had told Jisung that they were things for other kids just like Jisung that he was working on.

Jisung set down his backpack that he was looking through and padded over to Changbin. He reached forward and pressed his finger against the space in between Changbin’s eyebrows.

“Hm?” Changbin leaned back, taken by surprise  
.  
“You have the angry look again.” Jisung told him.

“The what…” Changbin frowned and Jisung pointed at his face.

“Sorry, I was just really focused.” Changbin shook his head slightly and set aside his papers. “It’s probably time to go. Are you ready?”

Jisung didn’t really want to see his dad today. The visits sometimes were boring or they felt like his dad was trying too hard. Many times, Jisung felt uncomfortable and couldn’t wait for them to be over.

Visits usually took place at Changbin’s house or at public places like the park. Sometimes his dad was there after school. Now that visits had become more frequent, there was less supervision from his caseworker. They were slowly working up towards doing unsupervised, overnight stays.

Today, he was getting his haircut with his dad after getting lunch. His caseworker wasn’t there today though they expected Jisung and his dad to only go to lunch and then get a haircut. It was the first time they were spending time together unsupervised. Jisung was at least glad that he could finally cut his hair. It was bothersome to have it falling in his eyes.

His dad didn’t seem to be in a good mood and he didn’t talk much with Jisung. During lunch they sat in silence mostly and Jisung started to feel bored again. Suddenly, his movie experience popped into his head.

“I went to the movie theater!” He blurted out and then proceeded to recount the whole experience. 

“Mm yeah, sounds fun…” His dad nodded as he paid and they went to leave the restaurant.

“And there were big curtains on the side of the huge screen like this!” Jisung stretched his arms wide. “And it was so loud!”

“Can you just shut up for a minute?” His dad suddenly snapped. “I’m trying to think for a minute.”

Jisung fell quiet instantly, feeling hurt by his tone. His dad just frowned down at his phone, probably trying to find a nearby place to get his hair cut.

Jisung waited a long time just sitting by the window while his dad got his hair cut first. When it was his turn he hopped onto the chair and smiled shyly at the person cutting his hair. They were gentle and soon they brushed a comb through his hair and told him he was done.

Jisung touched his chestnut brown hair which now fell across his forehead and not into his eyes. He looked to his dad for his opinion but he was already looking away and holding the door open.

“Can I… go to the bathroom?” Jisung asked shyly once they were standing by the car.

He had been waiting and sitting for so long that he needed to go.

“I need to get you home.” His dad replied. “Can’t it wait?”

Jisung considered for a moment and then shook his head.

“Well there isn’t one available around here.” His dad looked around. “Unless… Come with me.”

“I don’t want to go in there.” Jisung’s steps faltered and he stood on the curb outside of the bar his dad had headed towards.

“Hurry up, they have a restroom.” His dad beckoned him over.

Jisung didn’t like the vibe of the place, especially how dim it seemed inside even in the day. His dad hustled him towards the back.

“I’m sorry sir, no kids allowed in the bar.” A man called out to them but his dad ignored him. Jisung stopped again.

“It will only be a moment.” His dad called back and then harshly grabbed Jisung’s arm and pulled him forward. “Hurry up.”

Jisung did hurry, his arm aching from his dad’s tight grip. He felt relieved when they were out of that place. He didn’t say a word on the car ride home since his dad seemed in an even worse mood.

“Sorry we’re late.” His dad told Changbin when they got back. “Took longer than I thought.”

Jisung kept his head down when he got out of the car, suddenly feeling self-conscious about his new haircut. His dad didn’t stay to talk with Changbin and left without even saying goodbye.

“Hey, I wanna see the new look!” Changbin caught him before he could climb into the car.

Jisung shyly combed his bangs down with his fingers and looked at his feet.

“Looking very handsome.” Changbin complimented him but crouched down, trying to see his face.

For some reason, Jisung felt ashamed and wanted to hide his face. He didn’t like the way his father had been so rough with him today and he didn’t want that to continue over to Changbin. Somehow, he was doing something wrong but he didn’t know what.

“Why so shy?” Changbin laughed lightly and tilted his chin up to look at him.

Jisung held eye contact for a moment and then glanced away.

Changbin picked up on his shy demeanor and tilted his head in confusion.

“What’s up?” It was a simple question and Changbin’s voice was light and gentle.

It coaxed Jisung out of his shell a little bit.

“He told me to shut up.” He blurted out first.

“Your dad?” Changbin asked after a moment.

Jisung nodded and lowered his head again. He didn’t know why but it bothered him a lot.

“That’s… not very kind to say.” Changbin said slowly. “I’m sorry he said that.”

“It’s okay.” Jisung said on instinct.

“No it’s not okay.” Changbin shook his head. “We don’t tell people to shut up. It isn’t kind.”

Jisung knew it wasn’t kind. It didn’t feel kind when it was said to him. It made him feel bad. Like he was being bothersome.

“Hey, let me see your face.” Changbin lifted his head again to look at him. “He shouldn’t have said that. Whatever was going on, you don’t deserve to feel like he didn’t want to hear you.”

“Okay.” Jisung fiddled with the hem of his shirt. He didn’t know how to respond.

Changbin looked like he wanted to say more but instead he offered Jisung a smile and pet his head.

“Your haircut looks very good.” He complimented Jisung. “Let’s go home.”

Jisung forgot about what his dad had said once they were back home. After dinner, they started playing a game and Jisung was back to his usual bubbly self.

“I have terrible cards!” Changbin groaned, making Jisung giggle.

They were sitting on the floor around the coffee table playing a card game. 

“I’ll play… this one!” Jisung reached across the table to put down a card.

“Ah! You put me in danger!” Changbin gasped good naturedly. 

Jisung wasn’t paying much attention when Changbin touched the sleeve of his t-shirt and lifted it up slightly. He only looked at him when he brushed his fingertips over his skin gently.

He had a concerned look on his face that puzzled Jisung. But as soon as he realized Jisung was looking at him, he drew back and let his sleeve fall.

He didn’t say anything until the game was over and it was time for them to get ready for bed.

“Jisung, can you change into pajamas and then come see me in my room?” Changbin asked with a light tone.

“Yep!” Jisung ran upstairs to get ready.

When he came into Changbin’s room, Changbin motioned for him to sit on the bed. He sat cross-legged on the end while Changbin retrieved something from the bathroom.

“Can I ask you a question?” Changbin asked quietly as he sat next to Jisung and unscrewed the cap of the tube of cream in his hand.

“Yeah…” Jisung replied.

“How did this happen?” Changbin gently rolled his sleeve up so it stayed on his shoulder.

When Jisung looked down he was surprised to see little bruises marring the honey skin of his upper arm. They looked like… the imprints of fingertips.

Changbin was watching Jisung’s face closely and it made him nervous. He guessed that he had gotten them when his dad had grabbed his arm in the bar. It had hurt for a little bit after but he didn’t know it had bruised.

“I don’t know…” Jisung finally answered. For some reason, he didn’t want to explain what had happened. He felt like Changbin was judging his response closely and it made him anxious.

Changbin didn’t answer right away. He pulled out his phone and took a photo which just confused Jisung even more.

“I’m going to put this on your arm, okay?” Changbin said. “It’s to help bruising and swelling.”

He held it out for Jisung to see and when he nodded, he squeezed a bit onto his fingertips and began to gently rub it into his arm.

“Did your dad… tell you not to say anything about today?” Changbin asked while still focusing on his task.

“No.” Jisung replied, even more confused. “Why?”

“I just want to know how you got these bruises sweetheart.” Changbin looked at him again. “Can you try to remember?”

Jisung waited for a long moment, trying to decide if Changbin would be angry or not if he told him the truth. It was better to be honest, right?

“My dad was holding my arm.” Jisung said slowly. “But I didn’t know it made a mark.”

“Why was he holding you?” Changbin asked further.

“He wanted me to hurry up.” Jisung said. “In the bar.”

“You two were in a bar?” Changbin frowned and his hand stilled on his arm.

“To use the restroom.” Jisung answered.

“Oh… okay.” Changbin nodded but his eyes still looked worried. “Did he touch you in any other way that hurt you or made you feel uncomfortable?”

Jisung shook his head  
.  
“Did he say anything, other than to shut up?” Changbin checked.

“No…” Jisung shook his head again. He didn’t understand why Changbin was asking him all these questions.

“Okay.” Changbin rolled his sleeve down. “If you think of anything that happened that you would like to tell me then come to me, okay? I… want to make sure you’re alright.”

He paired his words with a smile and he patted Jisung’s knee.

“I will.” Jisung whispered, staring back at him. Something felt hidden but he couldn’t figure it out.

Changbin walked him back to his bedroom after their little talk and didn’t press him for more. When he got into bed, he waited for Changbin to switch on the little lamp on his desk that created a warm orange glow before asking him a question.

“Do you think my dad was angry with me today?” He whispered.

“Why do you say that?” Changbin stood by the side of his bed.

“He just didn’t seem happy today.” Jisung shrugged slightly. “And he was tired of being around me.”

“I’m sorry bud.” Changbin leaned down and ran his hand over his hair. “Maybe it was just a bad day. Next time… your caseworker will be there, or I will.”

Jisung nodded, accepting it quietly. He stared up at Changbin for a long time. Changbin was so kind and gentle, even today. It made Jisung feel bad sometimes that even after spending the day with his dad, he preferred being home with Changbin. Even the fact that his old house didn’t feel like his real home anymore. He felt like he belonged with Changbin.

“Okay, goodnight kiss.” Changbin gave him a quick kiss before leaving the room.

Jisung fell asleep feeling a little better after the long day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Here is a quick question! I would like to post another story after I finish this one but I am not sure which one you all would prefer! I have the continuation of this one, pt. 2 which picks up where this story ends and is already all written! Or I have a one which is a completely different storyline and revolves around Jisung and Jeongin mostly! I can explain more if interested but please let me know which you would like to read next! Thank you! <3
> 
> This chapter had me a bit stumped with how to portray Jisung’s dad’s interactions as he moves towards being less invested in Jisung. I know, it’s so sad, I’m sorry! There are supervised visits and unsupervised overnight stays which usually happen closer to full reunification. I wasn’t sure about the location rules for unsupervised visits that weren’t the overnight ones. In my personal experience overnight unsupervised stays are most common. That being said, I did research but couldn’t find much about location guidelines. I would assume it has to do with the rules in your state and the visitation plan put together by the three involved parties. Hopefully this isn’t too confusing in the story! I kept it for the plot but am willing to do more research if needed!


	7. Chan

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! This chapter starts off a lot of the drama and a LOT of emotional complexity. I’m honestly so sorry if this is triggering to anyone, please keep in mind the warnings that I provide! I don’t go into descriptive detail about many of the underlying themes, but the discussions in this chapter may be very sad. I wanted to shine a light on the struggle of a foster parent rather than just the foster child. This is just one experience and one situation though! Hopefully you enjoy!  
> TW: Emotional distress, Separation, Past mentions of abuse

Chan had been friends with Changbin since they were teenagers. Chan had never had a best friend until Changbin showed up. Their friendship felt like a cliché high school movie.

Chan was placed with the family that lived right next to Changbin. The families were close and his parents had hoped that he could be friends with the boy his age. They had a rough start and Chan owned up to the fact that he mostly made it difficult.

He was angry and emotional and didn’t want to be there. He wanted to return to his biological mom and he made sure his foster parents knew it. One way he did that was by refusing to make friends within their circle.

Looking back, it was a defense mechanism. He just didn’t want to accept his current circumstances and so he took it out on everyone else. It made things harder for himself but he was stubborn and couldn’t see past his own emotions.

Changbin was the opposite of Chan in every way. He was quiet and mild tempered and he never snapped back at Chan, even when he had every right too. Sometimes, Chan thought he hated him because he was so good all the time. He was also envious of Changbin’s perfect family. He had two kind parents and an older brother that he was close with.

Every effort Changbin made, Chan blocked. More for the principle than anything else. Deep down he wanted to be Changbin’s friend.

When they had just entered their senior year of high school, Changbin’s brother died. Suddenly and unexpectedly. Chan only felt compassion.

The bright, kind, loving person that Changbin was had been dimmed and it changed Chan’s perspective. No one’s life was perfect, or even especially great. Changbin experienced a broken family same as Chan even if the way was different.

Chan was there at the memorial service. He kept his hand on Changbin’s back for comfort. It felt like the right thing to do.

Looking back, Chan never stopped supporting and comforting Changbin. Both of them had a lot to work through, but they began to do it together.

Chan was the reason Changbin became a caseworker. He had always been someone who gave freely. Upon knowing Chan and watching his experience, he decided he wanted to do something like that for other children. Because of Chan’s relationship with his biological mom, Changbin understood the importance of reunification and how best to achieve that.

That’s how he ended up fostering Jisung. He saw a need and he filled it. He was Chan’s best friend, but also one of his biggest inspirations. Changbin was truly born to love and care for people. He had been doing so for Chan for years.

But it was a two-way street and the relationship was beneficial for both of them. Chan was always there to support Changbin in the ways he needed. At the moment, it was his situation with Jisung.

Months seemed to pass by like they were days and soon Changbin was facing a big decision.

“One of our visits didn’t go so well.” Changbin sighed. Chan and him were sitting at his house while the kids were playing outside. “Jisung came back with some bruises and told me his dad had said some things that hurt his feelings.”

Chan set his glass down, getting concerned.

“I took a photo of the injury and sent it to his caseworker but haven’t gotten much response with that…” Changbin dropped his head. “At most they’ll probably suspend his unsupervised visits for a bit. It just goes into conflict with our visitation plan so I doubt it will be long before they reinstate them.”

“Are you worried he’s not safe?” Chan asked.

“To be honest, I don’t know.” Changbin replied. “It seemed to be an accident and I think Jisung was telling the truth when he told me the story. It’s just the emotional conflict he has to go through every time!”

“I try to do most visits at my house since it’s in the natural setting for Jisung, but the ones away from me are usually unsupervised and he always seems to take them hard.” Changbin continued. “I just don’t see his father making any effort. It’s only because we are pushing the reunification plan that we are getting anywhere.”

“That sounds like a lot to deal with.” Chan shook his head in empathy. “Hopefully you’re able to support Jisung through all of this.”

“He’s tougher than I thought.” Changbin replied. “He’s definitely a little firecracker when he’s comfortable.”

“Love to hear it!” Chan laughed. He had a soft spot for Jisung.

Jisung was a lot like him. The difference was, he was so gentle and open. His heart was so soft and vulnerable, Chan worried for him. He felt the need to protect him just as much as Changbin did.

Where Chan had wanted to be with his biological mother until the end, Jisung was visibly drawing away from his father and the divide between them was growing wider on the daily. Even though Changbin had worked so hard for reunification, Jisung showed less and less interest.

“How’s it going with Minho?” Changbin reversed the conversation to Chan’s kid.

“Everything’s going pretty good.” Chan sat back in his chair. “I’ve been more attentive to what he’s been up to after that incident with Jisung.”

Changbin nodded.

“He’s really warmed up to me and it feels pretty good.” Chan couldn’t help but smile. “Sometimes he’s still a hard one to break through to, but he’s been more open and compliant recently.”

“Stepping stones turn into milestones huh?” Changbin joked.

“Seriously.” Chan agreed. “I have never experienced such a roller coaster of… everything! Any small victory is a huge victory in my book.”

“Welcome to parenting!” Changbin laughed as Chan punched him in the arm.

“I’m ready to retire!” It was just a joke but Chan didn’t realize that soon he would be faced with a dilemma involving just that.

Once a month, Minho had contact with his father. In person visits were something Minho had strongly expressed his dislike for and his caseworker had also deemed them not the most suitable for the case. Instead, his communication was through the phone.

Chan was busy in his office when Minho came and knocked on his door.

“Are you done?” He asked Minho. The phone calls weren’t usually terribly long.

“Yeah… I just-.” Minho trailed off, looking confused.

“What’s going on?” Chan asked.

“My dad said my aunt is going to come and get me.” Minho said flatly.

Chan had not expected this at all. It was obvious Minho hadn’t either because he just stood there with a blank look on his face like he was lost in thought.

Half an hour later, Chan was pacing his room on the phone with his caseworker.

“I just don’t understand how she can pop up out of nowhere. And I don’t appreciate that Minho finds out about this from his father before I even know!” Chan said. “I haven’t even been able to talk to my wife about this yet!”

His caseworker had called him just after Minho had told him with the news. It had completely blindsided Chan.

“How will this change his case?” Chan asked, sitting on his bed.

Ara came into the bedroom then, having just come home from work.

“Yeah, uh-huh…” Chan gave her a look which meant he was focused on something serious. “How does that affect us though?”

Chan didn’t blame the caseworker but the lack of information was making him irritated. He knew that they were trying their best and were taking things one step at a time as they were able, but it felt terrible to be left in the dark.

“Do we have to incorporate her into visits?” Chan had many questions to ask and not enough clarity of mind at the moment to articulate them all.

Ara sat on the edge of the bed facing him.

“Okay, yes. Thank you.” Chan ended the call with a sigh.

As soon as he was done, he groaned and let his shoulders slump forward. 

“What’s wrong?” Ara asked and reached forward to massage his shoulder.

“Apparently Minho has an aunt and now… she wants to take him.” Chan said hollowly.

“What? When did this happen?” She frowned.

“A few hours ago.” Chan dropped his head into his hands. “I had no idea…”

“I thought all family members would be contacted before they even sent him into the foster care system.” She expressed her confusion.

“They can always show up somehow or decide they changed their minds or… I don’t know!” Chan groaned and ran his hands through his hair in frustration. “It’s just a variable we didn’t plan for.”

“So then are we setting up a reunification plan with her or his father?” Ara asked. “He is being released in a month and a half.”

“I had honestly hoped our reunification plan would be with his father.” Chan answered. “With his aunt in the picture, the caseworker says we have to involve her immediately. I don’t know really but it seems she is going to be a part of his case.”

“Legally, this will become complicated.” Ara bit her lip thoughtfully. “I had also hoped that our visits and reunification plan would revolve around his father.”

“We were so close to his father’s release too!” Chan groaned and fell back onto the bed.  
He let Ara talk through her thoughts but stayed silent. It was a lot to process in just a few hours. It also made him feel guilty.

Because he had a secret.

Though reunification was the goal, his mindset had changed over the months that he had spent with Minho. He hadn’t believed that his father would succeed in winning Minho back and so he slowly slipped into the mindset that they would just have to wait for the time frame for terminations of parental rights to come. 

The first thing that changed his mind was the way Minho’s father contacted him. It only occurred once a month and every call seemed dry and uninteresting. Chan suspected that his father only called because he had few responsibilities in jail. It at least gave him some routine or an activity to accomplish.

Secondly, Chan had slowly begun to unpack Minho’s past over months of slow progress. Minho’s father had been abusive and Minho had witnessed many traumatic experiences. Many of them involving women he didn’t even know.

His nightmares and struggle to connect with father figures stemmed from his traumatic past. Chan couldn’t see his father creating a healthy environment once out of jail.

But he had to recognize that people change and Minho’s father could return as a new person. That’s why he was waiting for his release. Now with this new variable in the mix, some of Chan’s desires came to the surface.

Ones that he didn’t want to admit. Like that fact that he was just attached to Minho. He loved him like his own kid and believed living with Chan and Ara had helped him tremendously.

He knew from his own experience that children wanted to be with their biological parents more than they wanted just a nice house. But Minho was different. He didn’t want to return to his father and it created a struggle for Chan.

Over the space of the next month he had to face some hard truths and it was anything but a smooth transition.

Chan was forced to watch helplessly as Minho slipped away from him. The court had been evaluating the aunt and though she still seemed to be a subpar option, she was the best one available.

Sometimes Chan wondered if the court was just trying to rush along the case. Sometimes it felt that way with how sudden everything was. Ara and him had spent countless nights staying up and discussing the situation until Chan dropped his head in defeat.

The worst part was that Minho seemed to know something was slipping. Chan had expected him to almost be resigned.

Instead, Minho had become more and more vocal about his dislike for the situation. He had even flat out asked Ara if they could adopt him. It was obvious that he didn’t want to leave.

It should have filled Chan with joy, but he only felt sadness. The farther and farther they went down the path towards Minho’s separation from them, the harder Minho would fall. Chan knew deep down that it was only a matter of time before Minho would have to face the hard truth. He would have to leave.

It was something that Chan couldn’t accept himself yet. He was grasping at straws. He had tried to drill it into his brain over and over that reunification was the goal. He remembered his own mother making every effort to keep him with his biological mother.

But Chan had become so attached to Minho. He knew now the severity of what Minho had to live under and he couldn’t bear to send him back to that. Especially after Minho had begun to be less subtle about expressing his desire to stay with them.

As he often did, he went to Changbin with his concerns.

“You’re having a hard time.” Changbin said it more as an observation, not a question.

“I know I should have been prepared for this because this has been the reality from the beginning but… maybe I thought something would change.” Chan admitted. “I thought if things went well then maybe we would reevaluate.”

“What was your goal in the beginning?” Changbin asked him.

“Well… we were going to take in a kid whether or not we got to keep them.” He answered. “It was kind of touch and go.”

“But now you’re serious about Minho?” Changbin said gently.

Chan raised his head and swallowed hard.

“I didn’t expect to love him so much or for him to… want to stay with us.” He continued.

“He said he wanted to stay with you?” Changbin perked up at that.

“Yeah and it just about broke my heart Changbin. Do you know how hard it is to not be able to promise them anything because of this system?” Chan asked.

“I know all too well.” Changbin sighed.

“I don’t know what to do.” Chan dropped his head into his hands.

Changbin reached forward and squeezed his shoulder. There weren’t really words of comfort at that point.

“Is it so wrong for me to not want him to go back to his father? Or his Aunt for that matter?” Chan asked.

Changbin was quiet for a few moments, weighing his words carefully.

“If we really are devoted and invested in the child, as anyone should be, it’s only natural to not want to give them up.” Changbin said. “But we have to remember the mental damage inflicted from separation. I know we are reminded that reunification is key over and over, but think about it from the child’s perspective.”

“Jisung cries for his dad sometimes.” Changbin gave an example. “He tells me he wants to stay with me but he also wishes his father had never abandoned him in the first place. Being with a biological parent gives a child a sense of belonging. We can’t take that away without thinking deeply and seriously.”

“Minho doesn’t want to leave though.” Chan shook his head. “Many times, he has a legitimate fear of his father.”

“That is true.” Changbin affirmed. “But if you can give him a chance then you’ve done everything you can do. Maybe after a trial, the court rules in your favor and you know that you did everything in your power to give him that option.”

“I know, but the Aunt…” Chan pointed out. “If she wins him then what do I do?”

“You’re in a really tough spot.” Changbin grimaced. “The Aunt most likely will not be able to win custody before his father is released. But then again, she is most likely a tool that his father is using from jail. If she does win custody then he wins as well.”

“She’s already getting close, Changbin.” Chan said seriously. “They’ve already upped her visits and my caseworker told me to prepare Minho as much as possible for moving.”

“It’s more serious than you expected all of a sudden, huh?” Changbin nodded empathetically.

“Yeah, I realize now how complicated and flawed the system really is.” Chan sighed. “There is good but there is also bad.”

“Keep me updated.” Changbin patted his shoulder as he got up to refill his glass. “I may not know everything on the legal side, but if you can manage to hold off on her winning custody until his father’s release then you can better evaluate the situation.”

Chan nodded. He was far more willing to hand over Minho to his father, even with his background than a total stranger. At least Minho would have a relationship with the man, no matter how tenuous. It was all up in the air at the moment.

Chan hadn’t expected the court date to go so wrong. He felt blindsided by the judge and even his own caseworker. 

When Minho’s Aunt was approved to take him, Chan was stunned. He sat in the parking lot of the courthouse for a solid hour, staring into space. His brain couldn’t process that Minho had just slipped through their hands.

Ara had stayed inside, talking to their caseworker. Basically trying to understand if anything could be done and how it had even happened. Chan didn’t have the strength of mind to even think through what had happened.

It had happened over the span of months but it all fell into place in that moment.

When Ara finally got into the car, she sat for a few minutes staring straight ahead just like Chan had. It really was a crushing moment.

“Maybe it’s for the best.” She finally spoke. “We didn’t see it coming but maybe that means it was meant to be since we couldn’t stop it.”

Chan knew her tone of voice. It was the one she used when she was hurting or didn’t know what was going on, but pretended to be brave.

“Reunification is the goal, right?” her voice wavered. “We did it I guess.”

“Did we do it with the right person?’ Chan said quietly.

“Our caseworker said she’ll be a good fit for Minho.” Ara took in a deep breath. “We just have to tell him…”

“Don’t do this Ara.” Chan said but he sounded like he was pleading with her. “I don’t think this is the right decision.”

“It’s not a decision.” She replied. “We have our hands tied so we have to make the best of the situation we are given.”

“Is this not hard for you?” Chan knew his words were unfair. He knew Ara was just trying to be strong and logical for the both of them. “We’re giving him to a stranger.”

“She’s not a stranger anymore.” Ara’s eyes glistened with tears. “She’ll be his guardian.”

“How can this woman who barely has her own life together, take in our son? How can she take care of him?” Chan gestured vaguely in distress.

“He’s not our son!” Chan was shocked when Ara raised her voice. “He never was our son Chan! And I knew this would happen because you become so attached! You don’t get to claim him!”

“I just want to do what’s best for him! It’s not my fault for having emotions a-and wanting him to be well-taken care of!” Chan shot back.

“We can’t be the only providers of that.” Ara replied. “We were always temporary. I love him as much as you do, but I always reminded myself that this would come to an end.”

“Well I’m sorry for not wanting it to end! I didn’t mean to become so involved but now I am and I can’t help it!” Chan yanked his hand through his hair in frustration and leaned his head against the window.

“I know…” Ara said more gently. “I saw you falling into accepting that life as our forever life but I just… didn’t know how to stop you, o-or help you.”

“It doesn’t matter.” Chan swallowed bitterly. “It’s all over and there is nothing I can do.”

He started the car and began to drive home, feeling a mix of anger and helplessness and sorrow churn within him.

He only calmed when Ara started crying in the seat next to him. He reached over to hold her hand for comfort. She didn’t embrace the touch at first but then softened and clutched his hand tightly.

“I’m sorry.” Chan apologized. “I shouldn’t have taken it out on you.”

“You didn’t.” She sniffed and wiped at her cheeks. “You’re hurting as much as I am, if not more. You have every right to feel sad or frustrated.”

“Still, we’re supposed to be a team. I should have let you in on how I was feeling sooner.” He moved his hand to her cheek, gently stroking his thumb under her eye to catch her tears. “I slipped back into feeling like I had to do everything myself because I felt overwhelmed.”

“It’s going to be hard and overwhelming for a while.” She responded. “We’re going to have to rely on one another.”

Chan nodded. When Minho had to leave, he knew he would be broken. But so would Ara and he needed to be strong for her. He had promised to always be by her side, as a protector and supporter. But most of all, as someone who would love her in the good times or the bad.

“We’ll get through it.” Chan promised. “Together.”

She took his hand in her own and pressed gentle kisses against it.

“Together.”

“I just don’t want to tell Minho until we know when his Aunt is taking him.” Chan said as they pulled into the driveway. “The caseworker said we should get a call notifying us within twelve hours.”

“Okay.” Ara nodded. “Let’s enjoy the time we have with him for as long as we can.”

“I don’t think he’ll take it well.” Chan said as he parked the car.

“I know he won’t.” Ara sighed before wiping her face and straightening her clothes. “But we have to do it and when it’s over we can comfort him through it.”

“There’s not enough time.” Chan replied.

“But we have some time.” Ara leaned forward to press her forehead against his. “We will maximize every bit of time we have right?”

“Right.” Chan whispered back.

“Now kiss me so I can make it through tonight.” She offered him a smile.

Chan closed the small space and kissed her gently.

“Together.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Wow… pretty intense huh? For those who are maybe disappointed or confused about Chan’s reactions, let me remind again, just in case, that no parent is perfect and in situations like these, the “right” way may not always be the way your heart feels. I work with foster kids and I have had some parents express to me the feeling of being torn between what they know is right and what feels best. It’s very complicated and many times there is no perfect answer. We will get Minho’s perspective in the next chapter. Until then, I hope everyone has a wonderful day!


	8. Minho

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi there! Already the 8th chapter! Yay!! I am so unbelievably nervous to post because I have been worrying whether or not you all will hate me for this! >.< Welcome to possibly the hardest chapter! (So sorry) More notes at the end! See you there!  
> TW: Emotional distress, Separation

Minho knew something was wrong. He had known something was wrong from the minute his father had mentioned his aunt on the phone. He had known that something had changed from the first visit he had with his aunt.

Even with his father’s release drawing nearer, he hadn’t expected to have to leave Chan and Ara so soon. If he was honest with himself, he hadn’t expected to have to leave at all.

After all this time, he had finally come to terms with the fact that he loved Chan and Ara and he wanted to stay with them. His feelings were based off of months and months of memories and experiences.

That’s why he began to worry as it became more and more likely that he would have to leave. He tried to deny it and ignore the potential change looming in his future. 

As hard as he tried, he couldn’t stop it. And when the final verdict finally hit him, he wasn’t ready to let go.

He was nervous when Chan and Ara called him into the living room to talk with him one night before dinner. He had a suspicion it was about what he dreaded.

“Minho… I need to tell you something.” Chan said as he sat down.

Minho already knew what was coming. He knew that things had been stressful for Chan and any news was bad news.

“It’s about your aunt.” Chan’s voice was quiet.

“Please don’t say it.” Minho choked out. “I don’t want to hear it.”

“It’s not something we can change at this point.” Chan looked down at his hands. “I tried.”

“No. I’m not going with her.” Minho said firmly. 

“The court has given you over into her custody. And you’ll be moved within three days.” Chan said the last part quickly as if he was trying to get the words out as fast as possible.

“I said I’m not going with her.” Minho clenched his hands at his sides, feeling angry at the injustice of the situation. He didn’t know how to react so he reacted with anger.

“Minho just listen to me.” Chan attempted to calm him down.

“I can’t listen to you because I refuse and you can’t make me!” Minho snapped back. “It’s my life and I choose not to go with someone I don’t even know! I haven’t even spent a whole day with her!”

“We know she’s a stranger but you’ll have to get to know her.” Ara said. “As much as you hate it, that’s the only option right now.”

“Just stop!” Minho cried as he stood up. He felt like it was him against Ara and Chan and he knew he could never win against the two of them. “I don’t want to hear about her ever again!”

“We don’t want to hurt you.” Chan spoke again. “We just want to prepare you because… she’s taking you home in three days.”

“I’m not leaving.” Minho’s voice wavered and he had to clench his hands tightly into fists to keep his hands from shaking. “Her home isn’t my home.”

“Minho, please…” Chan looked so defeated it made Minho want to cry but he refused to let his emotions show like that.

“It’s not fair that you are forcing me to do this!” He finally shouted, pointing his finger accusingly at them. He knew it wasn’t their fault but, in the moment, it felt as if they had betrayed him by even entertaining the thought.

“I wanted to stay with you! I wanted you to adopt me!” As soon as Minho shouted the words out loud it felt more real and he felt a crack in his strong façade. Tears welled up in his eyes and his bottom lip trembled.

“Can’t you see we wanted that too?” Chan replied. “I would give… my very life to be able to keep you! I can’t bear to think about it either but I have to!”

Ara dropped her head into her hands, too overwhelmed with emotion to engage.

“Then why can’t you just do it!” Minho screamed at him. “Why can’t you keep me but a stranger gets to take me away? Why? I don’t understand.”

“Minho, calm down, we can talk about this.” Chan stood as well, trying to talk Minho down.

“No.” Minho shook his head. “You gave up on me. You’re letting me go.”

He knew deep down that wasn’t true but in the moment that’s all he could think. He was too overwhelmed with emotion to think of the damage his words may cause.

“I’ll just leave now then. It doesn’t make a difference anyways.” Minho said quietly.

“No, that’s not-.” Chan didn’t get to finish his sentence because Minho was already turning towards the door. He shoved his feet into his sneakers and yanked open the door. It was night and it was cold out so he instantly regretted not bringing a coat, but he wouldn’t turn back.

The anger and grief and pain had him burning inside. His legs carried him down the street without direction. He just wanted to go anywhere fast. He wanted to get away from the now painful place.

“Minho!” Chan shouted after him. “Minho!”

Tears were running hot down his face and he brushed them away roughly. He hated how weak he was. How dependent he had become on Chan and Ara. He just wanted to escape the feelings he was struggling through.

“Minho, stop!” Chan hand suddenly grabbed his arm and pulled him to a stop.

“Let go of me!” Minho cried, trying to pull away.

“No, Minho- stop!” Chan struggled to get a good hold on him as he tried to push away.

“I’m leaving like you wanted!” Minho delivered a verbal blow and then seconds later gave Chan a physical blow.

He pounded his arm against Chan’s chest to try to get away from him.

“I said stop it!” Chan shouted and adjusted his grip so he was grasping Minho’s biceps tightly.

“Listen to me!” His tone was more serious and demanding then Minho had ever heard. “I want you Minho. I would never willingly give you up.”

He punctuated his words by shaking Minho just slightly. Minho stayed still, held in place by the strong emotion in Chan’s eyes.

“I don’t have a choice! I have done absolutely everything I can.” He continued. “It’s just… not enough.”

Minho blinked up at him through watery vision, expecting him to repeat what he had said earlier. Instead, he surged forward and hugged Minho tightly against him.

“I don’t want to do this.” He breathed. “It’s killing me to do this.”

Minho stayed rigid for a moment and then his body and heart gave in and he melted against Chan, wrapping his arms back around him and holding him close. Chan was the only thing centering him in the moment.

“You have every right to be angry at me and hate me.” He said. “But I could never let you go easily and I would always fight for you even if I can’t win.”

Minho didn’t respond, his mind too exhausted. He just let Chan hold him close and soothe his aching heart.

He knew that he couldn’t have what he wanted. If even Chan couldn’t keep him there then it was all over.

He was so exhausted that he skipped dinner and went straight to bed. He could hear Ara and Chan talking softly in their room, probably about his meltdown, but he fell asleep before he could worry about it.

The three days that Minho had seemed like they weighed on him like a physical burden. He would be dropped off to his aunt on Monday. Today was Friday and it was already going by to fast. He sat in school, his attention entirely elsewhere.

During lunch he didn’t say a word. He didn’t have an appetite either. He just poked at his sandwich while listening to Jisung talk.

Jisung. He didn’t know how to tell Jisung. He had a feeling that the boy would be worried about it and Minho couldn’t handle anymore negative emotion. He got through the day without having yet another breakdown though he wished he could vent his emotions some way. Maybe then it wouldn’t be so hard.

“Do you want to go anywhere today?” Chan asked him gently once they were in the car. “I took the day off work so we can do anything you want.”

He knew Chan was making an effort to maximize the time they had left but Minho was too tired inside. He just wanted to shut down and not engage.

“Can we go home.” Minho replied quietly and avoided looking at Chan.

He was silent for a moment and his gaze traveled over Minho’s face before nodding.

“Yeah, we’ll go home.” He listened graciously.

Neither Ara or Chan had mentioned it, but he knew he had to pack and be ready to leave. He had planned to get home and get it over with. But maybe he wasn’t ready because he sat on his bed staring at his room and it felt like too big of a task.

He looked at the desk which was cluttered with his things. His shoes thrown haphazardly by the closet. The dresser which held the clothes he had accumulated over the year thanks to Ara.

There was a tiger on his bedside table that she had bought for him after watching almost twenty-four hours straight of big cat nature documentaries. And a polished sea stone that Chan had picked out for him from the time they went to the beach.

It was a lot of memories that he would be packing away. He felt like he had finally managed to pack away the bad ones and replace them with good ones and now he had to reset all over again. He didn’t know if the future would hold good or bad experiences. He didn’t really know anything.

“Thinking about something?” Chan interrupted his thoughts from the doorway.

“Not really.” Minho shrugged and smoothed his hand across the covers of his bed.

“If you’re up for it, Changbin is making a big dinner tonight.” Chan offered. “He invited us over. I thought you might want to see Jisung.”

Minho considered the option. It might be the last time he got to see Jisung outside of school. He hadn’t gotten to tell him yet. It would probably be best to go.

“Okay. I’ll be ready in a minute.” Minho stood and made his way to his closet.

Chan lingered for a moment and then returned downstairs.

It was really hard for Minho to swallow down the anxiety stirred up in his chest when Ara knocked on Changbin’s door. He thought maybe it was a bad idea and he should have stayed home.

As always, the three of them were welcomed in warmly by Changbin and Minho didn’t have much time to feel any worse about the situation before Jisung was at his side, chattering away happily. Minho couldn’t tear his eyes away from the energetic boy as he used his hands to describe the apparent mess Changbin made in the kitchen on accident.

He waited until the last moment possible to finally tell Jisung. They escaped to his room after dinner and Jisung beckoned Minho to sit on his bed next to him.

“I… have something to tell you.” Minho finally got out.

“Me too.” Jisung replied.

“You should probably… go first.” Minho gestured for him to go ahead.

Jisung suddenly looked a little nervous and glanced away from Minho shyly.

“Changbin told me you have to go away soon.” Jisung started hesitantly. “And that even if we still go to school together, we might not be able to see each other much.”

A small wave of relief washed over Minho. Knowing that Changbin had already broken the news to Jisung made everything easier.

“I’m sad you have to go. But I promise we’ll still be good friends and we can see each other at school as much as possible!” Jisung suddenly extended his pinky to Minho.

Jisung was sweet and maybe a little naïve about what was really going on. Yet he made it seem simple and not as life shattering. For that, Minho was grateful. 

He gladly linked his pinky with Jisung’s and pressed their thumbs together.

“Promise.”

“I also have something for you.” Jisung continued. “When I first started living with Changbin I felt lonely.”

He reached over and lifted his puppy plushie into his arms.

“Maybe I’m too old to have plushies now but they are still nice to cuddle when you feel lonely.” He blushed and looked down at the soft comfort item. “I know I can’t see you all the time anymore but I can give you something to remind you of me and maybe make you feel less lonely.”

Upon finishing his explanation, he placed the puppy in Minho’s lap.

“You don’t have to take it if you don’t want it.” He said. “I just thought it might be helpful.”

Minho took the plushie in his hands carefully. He stared down at it, at a loss for what to say. He knew it was a precious belonging of Jisung’s. Even if it was considered childish.

He would feel guilty for taking it if he didn’t recognize the genuine consideration behind it that Jisung had expressed. It was meant to give him strength for what he had to go through. Jisung was maybe the only person he knew who could understand what he had been through. The simple toy meant a lot.

“Thank you.” Minho whispered. “I’ll keep him safe.”

When he said goodbye to Jisung it didn’t feel like the end. The younger boy waved at him from the porch as he drove away and it felt like he was just saying goodbye until the next meeting.

Minho didn’t think he would immediately become attached to the plushie Jisung had given to him but he couldn’t sleep with it sitting on his dresser. He got out of bed and returned with it held securely in his arms. Jisung was right. It was comforting.

He pretended to be asleep with Ara came in a bit later. She gently touched the puppy held against his chest and then brushed her hand over Minho’s hair. Minho kept his breathing even when she kissed his forehead and pulled the covers up to his shoulders.

He knew Ara loved him. He knew that even though she had to work long hours every day, the best part for her was coming back home to see him and Chan. He hoped she wouldn’t be too lonely when he was gone.

The next day was hard. Ara stayed home for him so it was just the three of them the whole day. They did whatever Minho felt like, which wasn’t much, but he made an effort for them.

They were so much stronger than him. They tried to put on a positive attitude and made him feel like they were treating him no differently than usual. It was enough to keep him from falling over the edge.

The final day with them was hardest. All the emotions he had tried to keep hidden away deep-down inside were too strong to battle down. He was tired of forcing himself to be okay.

He felt almost detached from himself as he placed one of his shirts in his suitcase. The past few hours had been such a whirlwind of emotions. 

It wasn’t like any of the other times he had to pack. He wasn’t leaving because the family hadn’t been a good fit. His Aunt wanted him back. A woman who almost felt like a stranger to Minho. It had been only a few days he had known her.

Sometimes it made Minho feel sick thinking that his life could be packed up and completely changed within the span of a few days without his consent. He had no control over what happened to him and it hurt.

His chest ached as he knelt on the floor and folded his clothes neatly to fit. His chest had ached all day in a physical manifestation of the emotional pain. For the first time, he didn’t want to leave. 

A soft knock on his open door drew him out of his thoughts. Chan was at the doorway, his expression dimmer than it usually was. It made the ache in Minho’s chest grow.

“Need any help?” Chan asked.

Chan was like that. He never forced himself on Minho or assumed he knew what he wanted. He just let him be himself and was there if he needed anything. He was the first person that Minho had been with that had broken his expectations.

He had completely shattered them to be more accurate. Minho sometimes thought he hated the idea of a father. It was a broken and twisted image he had grown to know. Chan just didn’t fit that concept he had held in his heart.

Chan was comforting touches in the middle of the night. Gentle words even when Minho deserved harsh ones. He was light in every area that Minho had known to be dark. He wasn’t perfect but he was kind and gentle and sincerely good.

Minho nodded to Chan’s question though he didn’t know what he needed help with. He just wanted to be with Chan. He embodied safety and security in Minho’s eyes. He wanted Chan to be there with him just because he was feeling lost and Chan was so sturdy.

Chan picked up the pile of folded clothes that he had set aside on his bed and placed them into his suitcase, crouching down slowly as if his body was tired. Minho felt tired too. Tired in his heart.

“I put a load of laundry from the washer to the dryer.” He said. “If you have anything in there then we can put it in last.”

Minho nodded and placed his sweater on top of his shirts.

Minho had cried far too many times in front of Chan. But this time when the tears came, they felt different. He had never felt so broken before. It was terrifying.

He covered his eyes with his hand as he felt himself start to break down.

Chan didn’t say anything. He shifted forward onto his knees and gently pulled Minho forward against him. Minho didn’t reject his touch.

“What do I do?” Minho asked. It was a question he desperately needed the answer to.

Chan brushed his fingertips through Minho’s without answering for a long time.

“I don’t know…” He whispered. 

“I don’t even know her!” Minho cried. It wasn’t fair. He didn’t get to choose where he went even though he wanted to be with Chan and Ara.

“I’m sorry.” Chan could only apologize even though he had done nothing wrong.

Minho couldn’t bear the thought of leaving the first family he had ever wanted to be a part of. He wanted to stay with them forever. If they offered to adopt him, he would accept in a heartbeat.

Chan had been patient and loving and supportive through everything Minho had thrown at him. When Minho thought of who a dad was supposed to be, he thought of Chan. He had really gone above and beyond, exceeding all of Minho’s expectations.

Ara was not just a mom but also a friend. She was genuinely invested in Minho’s life and wanted to have a close relationship with him. He loved spending time with her because she was simple and fun and could go with the flow. She made him feel safe and loved.

He didn’t want to give that up. But he didn’t have a choice.

That night he had a different type of nightmare. Darkness was swallowing up Chan and Ara and no matter how hard Minho tried to tear it away from them, the inky darkness persisted.  
He woke up screaming.

As always, Chan was there for him in a heartbeat. He sat on his bed and pulled him into his arms as Minho felt like he was struggling to breathe.

The darkness was closing in on him and he gasped for air. Chan stroked his back as he breathed heavily.

“Don’t make me leave.” Minho gasped as soon as he felt he could breathe again. “Please don’t make me.”

“Shh Minho, calm down.” Chan tried to soothe him.

“Please don’t send me away! I promise I’ll be good and I won’t do anything bad.” Minho was frantic, clutching onto Chan’s sleepshirt desperately.

“Minho-.” Chan held his arms, maybe to pull him back to look him in the eyes, but it just made Minho more panicked.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” Minho repeated over and over, keeping his forehead glued to Chan’s chest.

“Don’t apologize. It’s not because of you.” Chan’s voice wavered. “J-just take a deep breath, okay?”

“I didn’t mean it when I said I hated you.” Minho cried. “I promise I didn’t mean it!”

“I know you didn’t mean it. It’s forgiven.” Chan hugged him back tightly. “Don’t think about it.”

“T-then can you take me back?” He pulled back to look Chan in the eyes in the dark.

“Min I- I can’t because- I just don’t have a choice!” Chan responded. “If I could keep you here I would but I don’t get to make the decision.”

“Please…” Minho didn’t even care that he was begging. “I don’t want to leave.”

He knew he was putting Chan in a hard spot. There truly was nothing he could do.

“I don’t know what to do…” Chan whispered. “I just can’t…”

Minho was too distraught to beg further. He knew it was useless so he just let Chan hold him close.

Minho felt half alive in the morning. He felt listless and exhausted. He didn’t utter a word as they drove away, leaving his house. The place that he wanted to call his.

“Do you think you forgot anything Min?” Chan asked.

He didn’t answer and let his head rest against the window of the car. He couldn’t bear to let his heart hurt again. He was too exhausted.

“Are you okay baby?” Ara asked softly.

She reached back to rest her hand on his knee but he shifted away from her touch without breaking his gaze out the window. He didn’t want to feel anything at the moment. Not even comfort.

He didn’t miss the worried look that Ara and Chan exchanged.

When they got there, Minho had resigned himself completely with the fact that it was all really over. He had numbed himself. It was already over in his mind.

Ara hugged him and told him things and tried to get a reaction from him but he wouldn’t speak a word.

“Minho. Look at me.” Chan cupped his face gently and rubbed his thumb under Minho’s eyes even though there were no tears to brush away.

“If you need me, call me.” Chan said quietly. “I’m always here.”

Chan always would be there. But he couldn’t be there in the moment which Minho needed him most.

“I’m sorry that I wasn’t there for you in all the ways I could have been.” Chan continued. “It’s not because…I didn’t love you.”

That woke Minho up a little. Chan had been there for him more than he could have ever wished for. How could he not think it was enough?

“I wish we had more time.” Chan bit his lip and he looked so distressed; Minho wanted to comfort him. “There’s so many things I wanted to share with you still.”

“Don’t say that.” Minho replied shakily. “I don’t want to hear that.”

He placed his hand on Chan’s chest to try to create distance from him before he broke all over again.

“You have to know how sorry I am!” Chan trapped his hand and kept him close. “I didn’t want you to have to go through this again, or at all.”

“I have to go.” Tears blurred Minho’s vision.

“I’ll always love you Minho, please don’t ever forget that.” Chan said with so much conviction that Minho’s chest seized.

He let go of Minho and let him step back. Minho wanted to say something but he just couldn’t. He was balancing on a ledge. He followed his caseworker into another room where he would wait for his aunt. It felt like waiting for his life to really turn upside down.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Here is a box of tissues for everyone. *tissues* Really sorry to put them through this but this is the reality for many families in the foster system. I know it’s a really tough cliffhanger but that’s why I will be posting chapter 9 AND 10 on the same day! It will be a double update so both storylines are wrapped up nicely! The chapter POV’s for 9 and 10 are Changbin and Chan respectively. As always, thank you for the support! Hopefully everyone is staying safe and healthy! Remember to take care of yourselves!


	9. Changbin

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! Welcome to the last two chapters! This chapter is yet another roller coaster! Are you curious about whether or not Changbin will be able to keep Jisung? Yet again, I’m sorry for all the drama in this chapter! I assure you; it is definitely necessary! Let me know what you think!  
> TW: Mild injury, Emotional distress, Legal issues

Changbin spent a lot of time with Chan in the days following Minho’s removal from their care. He had honestly never seen Chan so distraught. Ara even asked him to come over to the house just to check on him when she was at work.

A month passed and then another. Chan slowly began the healing process. Ara and him began to adjust to life without Minho bit by bit.

Changbin on the other hand was so wrapped up with his own work as well as trying to adopt Jisung. His father had become less and less involved with visits, missing so many that now he only attended around twenty percent. It had become a hit or miss.

Many days Changbin waited for the call from the caseworker to let him know whether or not Jisung’s father had even come. Many times, he never showed. On those days, Changbin spent more time loving on Jisung and making sure his confidence wasn’t completely crushed. It was hard for a child to feel abandoned by their parent, regardless of the relationship status.

The first moth he hadn’t shown repeatedly had been the hardest. Especially since it was following his unsupervised visit rights suspension. After the incident with Jisung’s injury the caseworker had deemed it best to take a slight step back.

Jisung’s father having some of his visits reduced meant that Jisung was able to spend less time with him. Changbin had been tasked with explaining the situation to Jisung.

He told Jisung what had happened after dinner. He sat down with him in the living room and explained that they would only be visiting his dad once that week. He had expected Jisung to be sad and disappointed but it still hurt his heart to actually see it.

“It’s okay to cry.” Changbin opened his arms for Jisung as he saw the boy starting to crumple in on himself. “Come here sweetheart.”

Jisung hugged him tightly and pressed his face against Changbin’s shoulder.

“You didn’t do anything wrong.” Changbin told him.

His father losing his rights and not being able to see Jisung was hard to process. To a child, it seemed like they were being punished.

Changbin let Jisung cry for a while, rubbing his back gently the whole time. His heart ached for the little boy trembling in his arms. It wasn’t fair to him.

Jisung mumbled something against Changbin but he couldn’t make it out.

“What was that?” Changbin asked.

Jisung turned his head so his cheek was resting against Changbin’s shoulder, his nose just below his chin.

“I’m being punished for having bad thoughts.” His voice was hollow and tired, like he was resigned to what was happening.

“What do you mean by that?” Changbin asked quietly.

“My dad has to go away because I don’t want to leave.” Jisung whispered.

Changbin was still for a moment, not sure what he was saying exactly.

“I made a wish.” Jisung melted a little closer to Changbin in exhaustion. “I wished to stay here with you forever… and not go back with my dad.”

Changbin nodded slowly, adjusting his arms around Jisung carefully.

“I’m not supposed to think those thoughts.” He shifted his hand to rest on Changbin’s chest. “That’s why my dad left me. Because I’m bad.”

“You’re not bad.” Changbin answered. “You’re not bad at all Jisung.”

“Yes I am…” Jisung said softly.

“You aren’t being punished.” Changbin reached his hand up and tucked Jisung’s hair behind his ear. “This has nothing to do with you. It just happened because your dad made some mistakes.”

“I feel bad inside.” Jisung’s voice wavered with tears again.

“What do you feel like?” Changbin gave him space to talk even though he wanted to hold him close and cuddle it away.

“I want to stay here with you. B-because you’re nice, and you don’t get angry, and I like doing things with you.” Jisung explained. “But…I don’t get to because it’s not right. My dad said I have to work hard and come back to him…”

Changbin bit his tongue sharply, feeling the familiar surge of disbelief and anger towards his father. His father had put the responsibility of the relationship on Jisung which was so wrong.

“It’s okay to like being with me.” Changbin said slowly.

He was walking a fine line. He didn’t want to say the wrong thing but it was a minefield.

“Do I ever ask you if you did good enough at the visits?” Changbin asked and Jisung shook his head slowly against him. “You don’t have to do anything sweetheart. That’s not your job.”

Jisung lay against him for a little while, obviously drained emotionally.

“I love you.”

Changbin almost missed the quiet whisper that slipped from Jisung’s lips.

He froze, unsure how to react at first. Then he settled for rubbing his thumb back and forth where his hand rested on Jisung’s back. He pressed his cheek to the side so Jisung’s head was against it.

He almost thought he imagined it. It was the first time Jisung had said it and it felt surreal with the current situation. For a second, Changbin wondered if Jisung was just saying it because he felt insecure in the moment.

“I love you,” Jisung said a little louder this time.

This time Changbin’s heart began to beat faster and his chest felt warm with something other than Jisung’s weight.

“I love you too.” He replied.

His throat suddenly felt tight with emotion. He wanted to hold Jisung close and tell him how much he loved him for days. 

He did love Jisung. So much it almost hurt sometimes. He knew deep down that he was fighting for Jisung wholeheartedly now. He couldn’t let him go.

Jisung had come into his life with his scuffed sneakers and puppy dog eyes and stolen his heart away. It hadn’t taken Changbin much to tie his heartstrings to Jisung’s.

He snuggled Jisung closer and pressed a kiss against the side of his head. 

In the moment Jisung was torn, not because he missed his dad solely, but because he preferred spending his time with Changbin. Though it made Changbin’s heart ache in sympathy to see Jisung struggling, he felt a little relieved at what he had admitted. 

Changbin wanted to adopt Jisung. He had tried to gauge if Jisung wanted that too. His admission of wanting to stay with Changbin solidified any uncertainties he had. The reason he hadn’t outright asked Jisung was because he didn’t want to raise the boy’s hopes since he was already fighting a losing battle.

The parent was always given preference because reunification was the goal of the system. He knew he would have to make promises that he didn’t know if he could keep. And the last thing he wanted to do was hurt Jisung.

Over the next month, his father proved to be more and more unreliable as well as more and more cold towards Jisung. His demeanor had changed from a mild investment in Jisung’s life to pure disregard.

The visit that finally settled it for Changbin occurred after the sixth visit his father had missed in a row. When Jisung’s caseworker had confirmed that he had arrived, Changbin packed Jisung into the car and headed to meet them.

It was obvious that Jisung’s father wasn’t in his right mind. Changbin noticed from the moment he pulled up that he seemed off. He had been sitting outside the building but when he stood, he seemed unbalanced.

Jisung stuck by Changbin’s side when they approached him. He had stopped running to greet his dad and was generally more reserved around him.

The caseworker joined them, having been on a phone call off to the side when they had pulled up.

Changbin greeted Jisung’s caseworker as he always did but kept his gaze focused on his father. He didn’t seem all there and he stumbled when he reached forward for Jisung. His actions made Changbin keep his hand on Jisung’s shoulder.

He didn’t miss the way Jisung shied away from his father’s touch as if he knew something was different as well. It made Changbin linger before leaving. The caseworker seemed a little preoccupied as well that day and hadn’t seemed to pick up on the strange behavior.

“Why don’t you sit down for a moment.” Changbin said to Jisung and then pulled the caseworker aside.

“Is everything alright with him?” He said quietly while motioning to the man sitting next to Jisung. “He seemed… off.”

“As soon as he arrived, I notified you and then had to respond to an urgent call.” The caseworker explained. “He seemed a little tired but I haven’t spoken with him yet.”

“Is it alright if I stay, just for a few minutes?” Changbin asked. He trusted the caseworker, especially now that he had pointed out a problem but Jisung’s safety came first and he felt the need to be there.

“Yes of course, I’ll talk to him now.” Changbin nodded his thanks.

It was obvious the situation was escalating when the caseworker began to talk with Jisung’s father and he became agitated while still not seeming to be in full control of himself.

When the caseworker told him the visit was over, he grabbed Jisung’s arm.

Changbin’s instinct was to immediately pull Jisung away but he stayed still as the caseworker began to talk through things with his father. It wasn’t much help.

“I’m taking him home.” Jisung’s father said and suddenly he was moving, pulling Jisung along with him.

“Sir- you aren’t allowed to resume custody over Jisung.” The caseworker attempted to say but words were lost on the man.

“Woah, woah can we talk this out.” Changbin stepped into the path of Jisung’s father and held his hands out nonthreateningly. “You can’t take Jisung with you today.”

“We’re going home.” He repeated and tried to step around Changbin to get to his car. There was no way Changbin was letting him get into that car with Jisung, especially since he wasn’t allowed custody and was obviously under the influence of something.

“Wait.” Changbin spoke firmly. He caught the man’s arm which was holding onto Jisung and wedged his body between them.

“Let go of the child.” The caseworker moved to block him as well.

He didn’t listen and tried to pull Jisung along after him. Changbin hated to become physical but he wouldn’t give up any more ground. He held Jisung’s arm with one hand and his father’s arm with the other. By planting his feet and standing strong he was able to keep either of them from moving forward.

Suddenly, it was like Jisung became aware of what was happening. He leaned his weight back and tried to pull his arm from his father’s grasp.

“No! I don’t want to go with you!” He cried.

“Let go.” Changbin repeated with an icy tone. He looked directly at Jisung’s father, only concerned with Jisung’s safety at the moment.

“The judge won’t look on this favorably.” The caseworker said. “Release him now.”

There was a moment of heavy silence and then finally his hand dropped from Jisung’s arm. Immediately, Changbin lifted Jisung into his arms and put space between them.

It took everything in him not to shout at the man. It had honestly been so much trauma for Jisung and this incident would surely be another painful memory for him. 

Jisung was distraught like Changbin had never seen before. Changbin took him to the car before dealing with the emotional break that had been building up for so long. 

Jisung sobbed until he was gasping for breath, his hands grasping and clutching at Changbin’s shirt in an attempt to pull him closer. He was trembling in Changbin’s hold as Changbin’s heart pounded harshly in his chest from the mix of fear and adrenaline that had shot through him.

“Shh, you’re okay Jisung.” Changbin rubbed his back. “Take a breath for me.”

Their caseworker joined them after a few minutes and it set Jisung off all over again.

“I don’t want to leave!” Jisung wailed and buried his face against Changbin’s chest. “Don’t make me leave!”

“You’re not going anywhere.” Changbin tried to calm him. “You’re staying right here with me. I won’t let anyone take you.”

It took half an hour to calm Jisung enough for Changbin to be able to separate himself. Even then, Jisung clenched his fingers tightly in Changbin’s shirt like he was trying to attach himself to him.

“You have to breathe sweetheart.” Changbin wiped Jisung’s face and tapped his chest which stuttered with short breaths. Take it slowly.”

“I don’t w-want to see h-him ever again!” Jisung stumbled through his sentence. 

“It’s okay Jisung.” Changbin replied.

“I want to stay w-with you f-forever.” Jisung looked at him with such desperate eyes with tear streaks on his face that Changbin had to bite his lip to keep from making a promise he couldn’t guarantee. 

“I don’t want him to b-be my dad.” Jisung tried to pull Changbin towards him again and Changbin had to stop.

He hung his head and took his own shaky breath. He had to remind himself that it wasn’t just about Jisung and himself. 

Jisung was emotionally unstable at the moment. He was asking for things that he may truly want, but might not receive. Changbin couldn’t feed into his pleas or promise anything, but he could comfort him.

“I don’t want to go w-with him.” Jisung’s lower lip trembled as he stared at Changbin hopefully, with his whole trust bestowed upon him.

“We’re going home today.” Changbin cupped his face and wiped away his tears with his fingers. “We’re done seeing him today.”

“I don’t want to visit ever again!” Jisung said with such conviction that Changbin was tempted to never bring them to another visit.

“We’ll talk about it later.” Changbin shifted the attention away from the sore subject. “Right now we need to go home.”

It was so much harder than Changbin had ever imagined. He had never expected himself to be in this situation. It was emotional pain shared by both Changbin and Jisung.

He knew it probably wasn’t safe to drive with one hand but home wasn’t far away and he couldn’t let go of Jisung’s hand. He reached his arm behind him to hold his hand and give that small comfort.

Turns out, that visit may have been the final straw for Jisung’s father. As the court date to review termination of parental rights neared, he was completely absent. Changbin suspected that he had come to simply take Jisung away with him since he wasn’t in his right mind that day. When he hadn’t been successful, he had given up.

Essentially, he had abandoned Jisung. Changbin wanted it to be over. He believed that Jisung needed it to be over.

He looked at the hurting little boy gazing out of the window of the car, or stuffing his cheeks full of pancakes in the morning before rushing off to school, and he worried. He didn’t know how many times he could keep piecing together Jisung’s broken heart before the pieces were too small to fix.

He knew Jisung wanted to stay with him, and he believed now that it was best.

Changbin had his caseworker record all visitation details. Jisung’s father had attended every visit early on in the case but by the end he was only attending one a month before going missing for about two months. Changbin’s strongest case against Jisung’s father was his abandonment. As well as the records of emotional and verbal abuse that Jisung had sustained over the span of the entire time he was in his care.

Changbin had been very conscientious of having their caseworker make a note of every incident that he found troubling, even if it had been a struggle sometimes. He needed any bit of leverage he could get.

When the court date for termination of parental rights finally drew near, Changbin was beyond nervous, knowing that now he was fighting directly for Jisung. He had stayed up sleeplessly for countless nights in a row worrying about what could go wrong.

Even though Jisung’s father had the odds stacked against him, the court would be reluctant to terminate rights as long as the parent was still involved, no matter how little.

Misun was over the night before for dinner. After Jisung went to bed, they both sat on the couch, honestly too tired to make much of an effort.

“Sorry I haven’t been talkative much tonight.” Changbin sighed. “I just can’t get tomorrow out of my mind.”

“It’s okay.” Misun smiled gently. “How are you feeling about all of this?”

Changbin could feel the anxiety rising in his chest at just the simple question. He was feeling lost and overwhelmed and more than a little terrified.

“I’m having to really fight for him and I-I don’t know what to do.” Changbin ran his hands through his hair. “I don’t have control of the situation a-and I just-.”

“Shh.” Misun closed the space between them and put her arm around his waist. “Take a breath Changbin.”

Changbin dropped his head and did as he was told.

“This court date tomorrow...” He said quietly. “I have no idea what they’re going to throw at me. I can’t even be prepared.”

“Don’t think about it for one minute.” Misun tugged him a bit closer.

“How can I not think about it?” Changbin raised his head. “Everything could unravel in a moment!”

“Look at me.” Misun pulled back and gently framed his face in her hands. “You have been worrying about it all day. You have to take a moment to just take a breath.”

Changbin breathed in slowly.

Misun let out a light laugh and pressed her forehead against Changbin’s.

“Not that kind of breath.” She smiled. “Let your mind and your body rest for a moment. You’ve been going for months.”

“I can’t give up now.” Changbin whispered.

“No way.” Misun shook her head as she drew back. “But don’t count yourself out just yet.”

“You know it’s not about how good I am.” Changbin said softly. “If they find just one good reason it’s all over.”

“I know.” She whispered back. 

There was no comfort in a situation like this. Promises were empty. Plans were always changing. And he could lose Jisung in a heartbeat. And like he always worried, anything could go wrong.

The first thing that went wrong was being late to leave the house in the morning. He tried to hustle Jisung along but he seemed to be moving extra slow.

Changbin was trying to hurry him into the car when Jisung screamed. It was definitely a cry of surprise and shock, startling Changbin as well.

He stepped to the side to see what had happened and then promptly lunged forwards. In a flash he was yanking open the van door and pulling Jisung back.

“It’s okay. It’s okay.” Changbin said immediately, tears already streaming down Jisung’s face. He lifted Jisung’s hand to see his fingers which had gotten smashed in the car door. They were already red and the skin looked awfully indented.

“Owie! I know it hurts.” Changbin worked on comforting Jisung first. He gently cradled his fingers with one hand and wiped the tears from his cheeks with the other.

Changbin inspected Jisung’s fingers again. They were already bruising but when he moved them back and forth, they didn’t seem fractured or broken.

Jisung’s uninjured hand fisted tightly in Changbin’s sweater as he tested curling his fingers gently. His sobbing died down into little whimpers.

“You’re okay sweetheart.” Changbin pulled him into a hug without jostling his hand. “It’s a big ouch, but you’re okay.”

Jisung dropped his face against Changbin’s neck, still sniffling and taking short breaths.

He ran inside to get an ice pack for Jisung’s fingers and then they were on their way.

Jisung kept sniffling and tears trickled down his face slowly as they were almost there. Changbin worried about how this would look. He would be late since he had to drop the boys off at Chan’s house first.

“Shh, shh.” Changbin gently removed the ice pack when they got to Chan’s. His fingers were swollen and still a bit bruised but they hadn’t stiffened up or looked broken. 

He wiped away Jisung’s tears with his sleeve gently. He wanted to take his time to comfort Jisung but he didn’t have time and he didn’t want to make a big deal over.

“I don’t want you to go.” Jisung told him as Changbin unbuckled his seatbelt for him.

“I have to go sweetheart. But I’ll be back soon” He replied.

“I don’t want to stay with Chan.” Jisung shook his head. “I want to go home!”

“I’m sorry bud, we have to do this.” Changbin felt awful about having to put him through this while he was emotional and hurting.

Jisung reached out his arms for a hug so Changbin hugged him comfortingly. But Jisung refused to let go of him when he tried to pull back. When Changbin tried to pull him away he just started crying again.

“Okay baby.” Changbin sighed and lifted him fully into his arms to carry him inside. Jisung buried his face in the space between his shoulder and neck, trying to hide his face.

It was a disaster. Jisung refused to separate from Changbin and there ended up being a longer delay as he tried to convince Jisung to calm down. Ara ended up being the one to finally distract Jisung long enough for Changbin to slip away.

“Good luck.” Chan squeezed his shoulder as he left.

It was the day that would determine the path of Jisung’s life. Changbin was by no means ready or prepared but it had come nonetheless.

Hours passed in court and by the time it had concluded, it was later in the evening.

As Changbin drove back to Chan’s house he couldn’t stop the tears sliding down his face. His emotions were too raw and overwhelming to hold back.

Chan was instantly worried when he returned. 

“What happened? What’s the verdict?” He asked immediately and stepped forward to pull Changbin into a hug.

“Where is he?” Changbin sniffled, desperate to see Jisung.

“Outside with Ara.” Chan pulled back. “Changbin, you’re scaring me, what happened?”

Changbin didn’t take a moment to respond because he was heading to the backyard, focused on one child.

They were playing baseball and Jisung didn’t realize Changbin was there until Changbin lifted him into his arms and hugged him close. He couldn’t stop the tears.

“Why are you crying?” Jisung asked. His small hands patted back and forth against Changbin’s back.

“What’s the verdict?” Ara asked, her eyes searching Changbin’s.

Changbin looked back at her over Jisung’s shoulder as Chan joined them and put his hand on Ara’s shoulder, awaiting his response.

“He’s mine.”

He was sobbing and clutching Jisung close because he was so relieved. It almost didn’t feel real. He had fought for Jisung so hard and now finally he was his. His son.

Ara covered her mouth and then she was crying as well. Jisung was bewildered to why everyone was breaking down but he knew it was something good because Changbin kept pressing kisses against the side of his head. 

Chan let out a breath of relief and hooked his arm around Changbin to hug him as well.

Finally, Changbin took a few breaths to stabilize himself and then set Jisung on the ground. He crouched in front of him and held his hands gently in his larger ones.

“Jisung.” He looked into his chocolate eyes. “Would you let me be your dad?”

The young boy looked confused for a moment but he didn’t hesitate to nod his head.

“I want to adopt you sweetheart.” Changbin cupped his cheek in his hand. “Is that okay?”

“Yes.” Jisung looked back at him with so much trust and faith that he almost started crying all over again.

“You’ll be my baby.” Changbin smiled and opened his arms for a hug.

Jisung fell into his arms, almost knocking him backwards. He lay his head on Changbin’s shoulder like he did when Changbin carried him into his bed after a long day. 

Changbin supposed it had been a long day. It had been a long journey but it was finally at the end. They were standing on the edge of a new journey, but this time it was one that Changbin and Jisung could walk together.

“Can we go home now?” He asked innocently.

“Yeah. We can go home.” Changbin smiled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Cries* I hope the happy conclusion was satisfactory! I worked really hard on this chapter and had to do a ton of research on the legal side to make sure I did everything correctly, even though I didn’t go into details! Separation of a biological parent and child is always heartbreaking and with foster care, reunification is the goal. However, I chose to portray in this story a situation where the child ends up being adopted by the foster parent due to the situation. Keep in mind that every situation is different and legal processes are different depending on location and regulations. Let me know if you would like me to post pt. 2 for this story next or my Jisung/Jeongin oriented one next!


	10. Chan

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There were so many legal processes to research that I gave up on accuracy a bit in this chapter.>.< I’m sorry if it’s not the most accurate! But anyways, it’s the end! I really hope you like the direction I took! Let me know in the comments if I should post pt. 2 to this story or move on to another series!  
> TW: Grief (?), It’s a pretty mild ending dw!

Chan laughed, really truly laughed for the first time in a long time. It had been a long time since he felt enough space in his heart for real joy to exist.

The laugh bubbled up from his chest happily as Jisung attacked him with tickles. In the moment, his heart felt light and he had no room for sadness.

“Time out! Time out!” He cried as Jisung jumped on him.

“Alright, he said timeout!” Changbin laughed at his predicament.

After a few last attacks, Jisung sat back and left Chan on the floor.

“You definitely killed him.” Changbin observed and stepped over Chan laying on the carpet to get to the couch.

“My one ally has failed me!” Chan teased back as he sat up.

“It’s your fault for not wearing pajamas!” Jisung pointed his finger at him and then ran away to the safety of Changbin when Chan raised his eyebrows back.

“Everyone is hating on my pajamas.” He pouted.

He was wearing a plain t-shirt and sweats but apparently those didn’t fit the mood of the pajama party.

“Changbin wears those as his clothes all the time!” Jisung pointed out.

“Aye!” Changbin smacked him lightly with a pillow. “Don’t say it like that! Only around the house you know!”

Chan laughed again at that and moved to sit on the couch next to his best friend who was in a similar t-shirt and flannel pajama pants.

It was his idea to have a boy’s movie night but pajama version. Ara had stolen his idea and taken Misun out for a fancy girl’s night as well. It was like a strange separated double date.

Chan put his arm around Jisung’s shoulder and tucked him against his side. The boy was now officially adopted and absolutely thriving.

Sometimes, Chan was amazed that he ever thought Jisung had been shy. He was playful and energetic and sometimes drove Changbin insane. Talkative beyond comprehension and loved being around people he knew.

He was really glad Changbin had given Jisung a home. Chan also loved the boy. Jisung sometimes felt like his own child.

Chan turned his head to look at Changbin once the movie had started. He looked back at Chan and gave him a smile.

A wave of affection washed over Chan for a moment. He was happy there with Changbin and the Jisung.

Somewhere halfway through the movie, Chan fell asleep. He was woken up by Changbin patting his thigh.

“I came to pick up my baby.” Ara smiled down at him and extended her arms.

Chan rubbed his eyes and went to sit up before realizing Jisung’s head was laying on his shoulder. He was fast asleep.

“Looks like everyone wiped out.” Misun whispered from behind Ara.

“I’ll take him.” Changbin moved to shift Jisung from his side but Chan stopped him.

“Can I put him to bed?” Chan asked.

“Yeah, go ahead.” Changbin nodded.

Chan carefully transitioned Jisung into his arms without waking him up too much. He was like a sleepy koala all cuddly and warm.

He made sure to be gentle and not jostle him too much as he pulled back the covers and lay him down. Jisung rolled onto his side and pulled the bear plushie Changbin had given him close to his chest.

Chan pulled the covers up to his chin before sitting on his bed and looking down at him with a soft smile on his face.

Changbin appeared in the doorway and leaned against the side of the frame with his arms tucked around himself. They stayed still for a few moments in comfortable silence.

“Finally some peace and quiet.” Changbin laughed softly as he came to the side of Jisung’s bed and reached down to brush his hand through his chestnut hair.

“Mm…” Chan hummed. He could feel Changbin’s eyes on him.

“I’m sorry it didn’t work out, Chan.” Changbin said gently.

Chan smiled sadly, reminded of the nights he would hold Minho.

“It’s okay.” He replied, looking into Changbin’s eyes in the dim light of the room. “There was nothing I could do so maybe it was meant to be.”

Changbin smiled slightly but it was one of sympathy. He knew just how much Chan missed Minho. The only thing he could do was hope it got better with time.

Later that night, Chan lay in bed waiting for Ara to join him. There was something on his mind that he kept returning to.

“Did you guys have fun? Before you fell asleep!” Ara asked as she came out of the bathroom.

“Yeah. How was it with Misun?” He asked back.

“Great! She is a really lovely person!” Ara slid under the covers and snuggled up to his side. “Do you think Changbin is considering seriously dating her?”

“I thought he already was.” Chan chuckled.

“I mean, you know!” She rolled her eyes. “Like this!”

She held up her hand to show her wedding ring in the glow of the lamp by their bed.

“Anything Changbin does has a purpose.” Chan observed. “I’m sure he is very conscientious about the relationship.”

“Good, cause I kind of want to keep her around.” Ara teased.

They lay for a minute in silence.

“I can feel you want to tell me something.” Ara spoke.

“Sorry, I’m just thinking about…” Chan trailed off.

“You’re thinking about him again, aren’t you?” She replied softly.

“Not exactly…” Chan sighed. “I was actually thinking if you would ever want to take in another kid.”

She thought about it for a bit while tracing patterns over his chest absentmindedly.

“I would love to take in another kid.” She answered. “But… I don’t know if it’s best for us. Can we handle possibly giving up another one?”

“I wasn’t thinking about fostering.” Chan corrected her. “Have you considered adoption? Many kids who become open for adoption don’t get adopted by their current foster families.”

“Mm.” She hummed. “I think that’s beautiful. They’re kids who for sure need a home.”

“I just didn’t know if you wanted to start our own family.” Chan said quietly.

“Are those kids not our own family?” She teased.

“You’re right.” Chan pulled her closer. “If you were open to it then I would definitely be willing.”

“I’m not opposed to it.” Ara pressed her hand to his chest. “Let’s keep having this conversation. I also would like to do some research.”

“Alright.” Chan nodded. 

“Now let’s sleep.” She reached up and covered his eyes with her hand. “Turn off the light.”

“Okay.” Chan laughed and reached for the switch.

Ara was true to her word. She did extensive research into the adoption process for the next few weeks. Changbin helped them get to know the adoption side of foster care where children were matched with a permanent family after the termination of parental rights.

After a full month of consideration, they decided they would adopt a child. Since they had been in the foster care system, it would be easier to work with someone to match them to a kid that needed them and would be a good fit.

Chan was still on the fence about having an open or closed adoption however. There were so many kids in need of a home it was no problem finding one, but still Chan hesitated. Ara didn’t mind either way. To Chan, an open adoption felt too much like having visits and it poked at the sore part of his heart that was still missing Minho.

He put aside his worries to join Changbin for a day. Being a single parent meant Changbin rarely got breaks. Some days he desperately needed someone to fill in the gaps and Chan or Ara were more than happy to help.

“His backpack with his homework…” Changbin handed a red backpack to Chan. “His soccer practice clothes and shoes… Remember therapy is at three-.”

“Changbin!” Chan laughed. “Don’t you think I have it down by now?”

“Sorry I just feel so scattered today.” Changbin sniffed, battling a cold which made it harder to deal with two busy boys and their schedules.

“I’ll text you if I need anything, now go rest!” Chan lightly pushed him towards the stairs.

“Okay, okay.” Changbin gave in. “Just don’t spoil him too much.”

Chan rolled his eyes but he knew it was true. He tended to spoil Jisung a lot. He couldn’t help it; he was too precious to him.

“Can we go?” Jisung whined, already impatient as they sat in the car.

“This car doesn’t start until seatbelts are on.” Chan watched him struggle to connect his belt before succeeding. “Alright we’re set.”

“I’m so glad you are hanging out with me today!” Jisung said excitedly once they were on the road. Chan smiled at how comfortably he addressed Chan now.

“I’ve been so bored! Summer break is boring.” He pouted.

“It’s barely been a week and you want to go back to school?” Chan gasped.

“There’s nothing to do!” Jisung replied. “Changbin is sick so he can’t even play games with us.”

“He won’t be sick for the whole summer!” Chan laughed. “How about this. If you get really bored you can call me and we can do something fun.”

“Really?” Jisung sat straighter.

“But you can’t be bored every day.” Chan set a boundary. “I make an exception for when you are truly bored!”

The counseling center Jisung went to was coincidentally where Misun worked. Chan was pleasantly surprised to see her when he dropped Jisung off.

“You have Jisung duty today?” She asked after giving the boy a hug.

“Yep.” Chan replied. “Changbin’s feeling under the weather today.”

“Oh no!” She frowned. “He said it was just a little cold.”

“It’s nothing too bad.” Chan assured her. “Knowing him, he probably didn’t want you to worry.”

“Maybe I’ll stop by after work and bring him sick food.” Misun nodded. “Are you staying for Jisung’s visit?”

“Yeah it won’t be that long and it’s no use heading home in between.” Chan answered. 

“You can join me in my section if you don’t want to wait in the general lobby.” Misun offered. “Probably the same amount of kids but not so boring.”

“I love kids.” Chan teased. “But thank you.”

Misun was quick to greet a new arrival so Chan had a moment to observe the room. A little boy in a sweater far too large for him was sitting against the far corner with a dinosaur toy in his hand. He looked to be only six or seven years old, the age of most of Misun’s regulars. He sat quietly, swinging his feet in the air while the other kids in the room played with the toys or books that had been set out.

For a moment, Chan thought of Minho. He wondered if Minho was alone like that little boy or if his new family was with him. He hoped his aunt was treating him well. Since school was on summer break, even Jisung wouldn’t see him for a while.

Maybe it was lingering emotion that urged Chan to cross the room and sit in the chair next to the little boy. He just didn’t want him to be alone.

When Chan sat down, the boy looked up at him with wide brown eyes. The look in his eyes somehow made him seem even younger. To Chan, he seemed too young to be left alone.

“Hi there.” Chan smiled to be friendly. “You look like you’re waiting and so am I! We can wait together if that’s okay with you.”

The boy continued staring at him, fidgeting nervously with the sleeves of his sweater.

Chan decided not to try to start a conversation since he wasn’t sure of the boy’s comfort level. Yet after a minute, a gentle tug on his sleeve brought his attention back.

“Is that real?” The boy’s voice was quiet and hesitant, pointing to Chan’s chest.

He had to look down to realize he was talking about the necklace resting there. It was a simple black cord and it had a shark tooth on it. He didn’t wear it often but threw it on today. Now he was glad he did because the little boy seemed interested and not as nervous.

“It is.” Chan nodded. “Do you want to touch it?”

“Is it sharp?” He eyed it skeptically.

“Nope.” Chan shook his head and ran his finger over it to show how it had been sanded down to be smooth.

“Is it from a baby shark?” The little boy touched it gently, his face intent with curiosity.

Chan smiled. He was a cute kid.

“It’s an adult shark but it’s a baby tooth.” Chan replied.

The boy cocked his head for a moment as if he was thinking.

“Can you say that again please?” He asked, pressing his lips together shyly.

Chan hesitated, not sure why he needed him to repeat the sentence but he did anyways.

“Oh…” The boy nodded and his caramel hair flopped into his eyes a little bit. He pushed it away and Chan noticed something when he tucked his hair behind his ear.

It was a small plastic piece fit snugly in his ear with a curved piece looping over the top to hold it in place. It was a hearing aid.

Chan had a moment of understanding when he realized why the boy had asked him to repeat his sentence. He was honestly impressed by how politely he had asked.

“What’s your name?” The boy cocked his head and stared at Chan. 

“My name is Chan.” He answered, taking note of how his chocolate eyes watched Chan’s lips move. “What’s your name?”

“Seungmin. I’m almost seven.” He answered with a smile.

“Wow you’re almost seven?” Chan looked surprised. “Happy almost birthday!”

“Thank you.” Seungmin bowed his head slightly and Chan smiled at how polite he was even for being so young.

“Sorry that took so long.” Misun returned. “Looks like you’ve been making friends.”

“This is Seungmin who’s almost seven.” Chan introduced the little boy.

“I know Seungmin!” Misun smiled and gave him a wave. “Someone was just looking for you! It’s time for your appointment!”

Seungmin hopped off of his chair and looked at Chan for a moment.

“Thanks for showing me your tooth.” He said solemnly. “Bye!”

Chan waved with a bright smile as he ran off.

“He is such a cutie.” Misun observed. 

“I noticed he had a hearing aid.” Chan said. “Is he hard of hearing?”

“He’s deaf.” Misun replied, sitting down next to him. “He’s honestly lucky to be here. His parent doesn’t seem to be able to afford many services so he’s in and out of here a lot.”

“He seems like he functions well though.” Chan commented.

“From what I’ve seen of him, he’s a really sweet kid. And, as you know, pretty friendly.” Misun nodded. “Though I don’t know how much longer he’ll be here. He’s one of our kids in transition.”

“What does that mean?” Chan asked.

“It’s not an official term, just how we sometimes describe the kids awaiting their forever homes. You know what I mean?” She explained.

“He’s a foster kid?” Chan clarified.

“Actually he’s waiting to be adopted.” She corrected. “The only problem is that his mom wants an open adoption which complicates things more. Not to mention not many families are willing or able to take in a kid with a disability.”

“Ah…” Chan nodded his head slowly.

Hearing her describe Seungmin’s situation gave him a strange feeling in his chest. For some reason, he viewed open adoption a bit differently upon hearing it. From the brief time he had with Seungmin, he could understand why his mom wouldn’t want to give him over completely. Even Chan had gotten attached to him in such a short amount of time.

He couldn’t get Seungmin out of his head all day. He couldn’t stop thinking about his need for someone to take him in who would give him the love and support he needed. 

When Chan got home after his long day, he headed straight to Ara who was sitting with her feet up on the couch reading a book. She had probably just got home from work and wanted to rest but Chan was impatient to tell her his decision.

“Ara, I want to do an open adoption.” 

She stared at him, shocked by his sudden declaration.

“I thought about it and I decided I want to do an open adoption.” He repeated as he sat down next to her.

“O-okay.” She nodded. “This is just… kind of sudden.”

“I know and I know it’s crazy and I shouldn’t rush into making a decision but it just feels so right.” He said.

“We can look into open adoptions.” Ara nodded. “Let’s check tomorrow morning.”

“There’s already a boy I want to adopt.” Chan blurted out.

Ara frowned and sat up a little more.

“I know it’s crazy and you will probably think I’ve lost my mind but hear me out.” Chan went on to explain his experience meeting Seungmin.

“I’m all for this whole open adoption thing and am… glad you feel so strongly about this boy but…” She bit her lip. “Chan, he’s deaf. I’ve never had experience with someone with that disability. How am I supposed to provide him with what he needs?”

“I know it’s a lot. I know we have to be one hundred percent sure that we are capable of doing this.” Chan replied. “But I looked into the services he needs as well as the ways he functions on a daily basis. Misun told me it will be hard to adjust but we can do it.”

“Misun works with kids all day. From all different backgrounds.” Ara pointed out. “It seems easy from an expert’s perspective.”

“Don’t you see though? Not many people build that skill set without having their own child or brother or relative be in need of it. There aren’t many options that he has for homes that are already experts in giving him what he needs.” Chan placed his hand on Ara’s knee. “We can learn. And maybe that’s what the world needs. A little more of people understanding and adapting to differences.”

“What you’re saying is good and it makes sense but it’s also so broad and you’re saying this from having only met this kid for a day.” Ara replied. “We both need to think about this more. We can’t make a decision right away.

“I agree.” Chan conceded. “But you’ll really consider it, right?”

“I will.” Ara nodded. “Yet we have to think through this rationally. We have to really be sure we can help this kid.”

“Okay. That’s fair.” Chan nodded. 

He tended to get caught up in emotions and act without thinking much which was why Ara was so perfect to balance him out.

She yet again set to work learning more about the things they would need to know while having a deaf or hard of hearing child under their care. It was definitely overwhelming but she broke it down bit by bit, constantly asking herself and Chan if they were willing to go the extra mile for this child.

In the end, Chan set up an appointment to meet with the person who had been helping them through looking into adoption. Ara gave him a tight hug before he headed to talk to them about their decision.

Adoption wasn’t an overnight process, but he wanted to make it clear that he wanted to do an open adoption for a specific child. 

Chan sat down with the woman that had been helping him through aspects of their foster care process as well as their transition into looking for a child to adopt. He felt oddly nervous for some reason.

“I’m really glad you came in today.” She said. “I meant to call you just yesterday about a child that caught my eye.”

Chan nodded and rubbed his hands on his knees nervously. He let her speak even though his mind was set on something, or someone, specific.

“You’ve been looking for a child through closed adoption over open adoption, correct?” She asked, checking his preference. 

“Um, we actually decided we would be willing to do an open adoption as well...” Chan updated her.

“There was one child that I thought you would be particularly interested in.” She pulled a file from her desk without acknowledging his last comment. “It’s a boy. He became open for adoption recently and…he made a request for you.”

Chan frowned. He hadn’t really been tracking. What boy? What child could have requested him?

“I keep an eye on the children who become open to adopt and attempt to match them with their previous families.” She explained. 

“Minho is open for adoption.”

Chan’s world stopped. Surely his heart stopped beating for a moment as he processed her words. Minho was… what?

“We didn’t call you until the case was officially closed.” The woman said. “That way there were no misunderstandings.”

“His father and Aunt have both had their rights terminated. It seems that unfortunately his father hasn’t changed his ways after returning from prison.” She explained.

“Minho is… you mean we could adopt him?”

“I know it’s been a while since he was in your care but I saw how hard you fought for him in court. I thought you and your wife would maybe be interested. Especially since he asked that I notify you.” She said.

“Where is he?” Chan gripped the edge of the desk tightly. “I-is he here?”

“He’s in the courtyard at the end of the hall. He will be placed with a family today, just in the meantime, until he is adopted.” She reached for his file. “Here is the-.”

Chan was already out the door and running down the hall. When he got to the final door, he yanked it open. It led to a small outdoor area.

Chan scanned the surrounding searching for a familiar face. When he finally found what he was looking for, a gasp fell from his lips in relief. Minho looked up at the same time and his eyes locked with Chan.

It wasn’t beautiful or inspiring like in the movies. When Minho collided with Chan and was swept up in his arms it was filled with tears and sobs. 

It was colored by pain and loss and heartache, all wrapped together in broken promises and uncertainties. Yet it was their story and their reality. Every step of the journey had some stumbles and scraped knees, but it led them to that moment.

It led to Minho clinging to Chan as if he was the only thing he needed in the moment. And maybe that was true. Maybe all Chan needed was Minho in that moment as well.

“I didn’t think you would come.” Minho sobbed against his shoulder.

“Of course I’ll come for you.” Chan hugged him tight enough to express his emotion but not enough to hurt him. “I’ll always come for you.”

“I was so scared.” Minho kept his face hidden against Chan.

He was trembling in Chan’s arms. His entire body overwhelmed by the emotions he was feeling. Chan felt the same way. He was practically vibrating with a hurricane of emotions that had hit him so fast.

“I’m here now and I’m not going anywhere.” Chan promised him. “I’m going to take you home.”

He pulled back slightly to look at Minho. A significant amount of time had passed and Minho was more mature, was a little taller, and his eyes were a little older. But he was still the boy that Chan loved more than the stars. He was still the child that earned a permanent place in Chan’s heart.

“Can I adopt you?” Chan asked.

Minho stared back at him, searching his face as if trying to reassure himself that it was reality.

“Yes.” He choked out. “Please.”

“You can’t even imagine how much I missed you.” Chan pulled him back into a hug.

Minho clutched him back tightly.

Chan hadn’t expected to see Minho ever again yet here he was in his arms.

“I’ll take you home, Minho. I’ll take you home.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow… not sure what to say now that we are at the end… As I said, bear with any legal or process inaccuracies, I was struggling to pin down specific answers and am limited to my own experience! I would really, really love to know what you all thought! I had lots of fun writing it and creating my own little universe!  
> I’m sure many of you are curious what happened to Seungmin! Spoiler! Yes, he is in pt. 2 of this series but I haven’t decided whether to post right after or not so give me your opinion! I will take 4 days break from posting and then will be back on my every other day schedule! Hopefully you will join me for what I have coming soon! I definitely am proud of this story but I think the next ones are even better so stay tuned!  
> If anyone read this whole thing than thank you! Seeing your hits, comments, and kudos gives me confidence to keep going! Feel free to discuss your thoughts with me! I hope you all have a lovely day! Thank you for your support! -Soojin

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! As many of you are probably wondering, is it possible for Changbin to be a single foster parent in reality? According to the laws and regulations of my state, yes, it is! In fact I have two friends who are single foster parents! For those who aren’t familiar with the foster care system, reunification is the primary goal so Changbin is required to set up a visit plan between Jisung and his father and make sure the visits are attended. He also has to go to court dates where updates are given and the case is looked at. I won’t put much of that in this story because it is a very extensive process that may not add to the storyline.  
> Let me know if you have any questions or comments! Will be updated every other day! 10 chapters total.


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